Category: Life in God

On crying & giving permission to die

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 10 November 2023
Lady of Sorrows from a triptych by the Master of the Stauffenberg Altarpiece, Alsace c. 1455; photo from fraangelicoinstitute.com.

There’s a beautiful interplay between crying and living. And dying.

When we were growing up as kids, siesta was obligatory at home. It was a moral ought that my mom would tell us stories in bed to fall asleep, always holding a copy of the Reader’s Digest with its beautiful pictures and illustrations.

One siesta time, the image of a newborn baby being delivered caught my eyes from the copy of the Reader’s Digest my mom was holding. Then the next illustration struck me – I was about four or five years old – as it showed the doctor held the baby upside down, crying so hard after being spanked by the doctor! My mom explained to me that’s the way it is with babies when they are born: if they cry, that means they are alive but if they do not cry, the doctor had to spank the baby in order to cry and be alive.

That was my first lesson about life strongly etched in my mind. As I grew up and matured, especially after being ordained as priest, I realized deeper meanings from that simple explanation of my mom: crying is part of our lives. If we get hurt, if we suffer, if we cry, that means we are still alive.

Photo by Daniel Reche on Pexels.com

Many times in life for us to live, we have to kick hard and cry so hard enough like newborn babies to breathe and be alive. It is in crying we realize so many things in life, about real friendships and relationships, about joy and sadness. There are times we cry not only when in pain and agony but even when we experience joy. In fact, our most profound experiences in life are best expressed with tears when we cry, best when in silence and alone.

Crying is life’s most wonderful and effective response to any experience in life so burdened by many things (see our previous blog, https://lordmychef.com/2021/11/23/on-shedding-tears-and-crying/).

But, death had also taught me something so amazing and lovely about crying. I consider it as the other side of crying. And of life.

Photo by author, Baguio City, August 2023.

It happened when my best friend, Gil died in 2015. He asked me in February that year to pray for his long-delayed medical checkup; that same night, he called me again that his doctor had him confined for suspected cancer. After a series of tests, he had radiation then surgery after which followed his series of chemotherapy.

Gil cried a lot when diagnosed with cancer. He was angry and bitter with his sickness. And for a good reason because among us from high school seminary, he was the healthiest and most health conscious! I knew it because when news of that mad cow disease from Europe broke in early 2000, he stopped eating beef even burgers!

In mid September, her Ate Lily called me that doctors had told them Gil’s cancer cells were very aggressive and would have a short time to live. It was a Sunday and we his friends rushed to Makati Med that afternoon. I came to visit him for another three days before he died early Sunday morning, September 22, 2015.

It was during his final week in the hospital when he asked me for a “permission to die” (see our blog, https://lordmychef.com/2023/11/08/giving-permission-to-die/). Gil simply told me he was ready to go. His face was radiant and light, he was so at peace on his hospital bed as he gave me other final instructions for his kids and ex-wife.

I could not say anything except cried. And I cried so hard, especially as I anointed him with holy oil and prayed the commendation to the dying. It was from Gil that I realized the dying receive that special grace of knowing the end, possibly even of seeing heaven that is why they are always so composed like Jesus Christ on the Cross on Good Friday. I told him how I wish I could have that same courage in facing death when my time comes. He assured me God would give me that grace too.

From that experience, I realized when people get sick, they cry because that’s when death faced them. Who would not cry and be terrified? We their friends and family in turn, console them. The inverse happens when they approach death: they are so composed, we their family and friends are the ones crying. And the one dying are the ones consoling us! When they die, we cry. Why? Because we do not know what happens next, of what lies ahead when our loved ones are gone. Paano na tayong naiwan? That’s the saddest and scariest part of life when someone dear to us dies.

In 1999, St. John Paul II wrote a letter to his fellow elderly where he said that the grace of getting old is to be able to look back to the past with gratitude and to look forward to the future with joyful anticipation of eternity. That holy Pope must have been seeing heaven while still here on earth!

Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, 06 November 2023.

It is in death when we see its strange contrast with life, of how when we were born, we cried and kicked hard to be alive while those around us rejoiced with the gift of life; when we die, we do not cry because we are already joyful with the coming bliss while those around us are filled with grief and sadness, crying not only with our demise but because they do not know what lies ahead.

In both instances, we find the grace of God so pronounced, so present that indeed, St. Paul was absolutely right:

None of us lives for oneself, and no one dies for oneself. For if we live, we live for the Lord, and if we die, we die for the Lord; so then, whether we live or die, we are the Lord’s.

Romans 14:7-8

When we were growing up, there was a baby shampoo that advertised itself so mild that would not hurt your eyes, marketing itself with the words “No more tears”. It also played a commercial of a young boy going to shampoo his hair declaring, “a man should not cry” to bolster that old belief that crying is weakness.

At the sermon on the mount, Jesus taught us one of the beatitudes as “Blessed are they who mourn, for they will be comforted” (Mt. 5:4). I love using this gospel in funeral Masses. Where is the blessedness of mourning the death of a loved one? What is good with mourning, with crying?

Answer: love.

Blessed are those who mourn because they have love in their hearts. We cry at the death of a beloved because we love them. But, the greatest blessing we have when we mourn is from the love we have experienced from the one who had died. It is said that “if you have love in your heart, you have been blessed by God; if you have been loved, you have been touched by God.”

We are blessed when we mourn, when we cry at the death of a beloved because they loved us, they gave us a glimpse of God, they made us experience God’s love in their love! Is it not a tremendous blessing indeed?

We are so blessed these days that crying is no longer considered as a sign of weakness but actually of strength – the strength to live and the strength to forge on in life after the death of a beloved. Cheers to our tears that keep us alive! Have a wonderful weekend!

Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, 2021.

Giving permission to die

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 08 November 2023
Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, 06 November 2023.

A very dear friend died last October 16 after more than three years of fighting cancer. She used to be one of our elementary teachers at the school I was first assigned after ordination. She later resigned to teach abroad but every year whenever she was home for summer vacation, she always invited me to join their mini-reunions of former co-teachers.

Everything changed in 2020 when she had to retire early to return home for her cancer treatment. We could not visit her during the pandemic lockdown, occasionally meeting her via zoom and video phone calls. When COVID subsided a little in late 2021 and early 2022, we finally met briefly. She seemed to be responding well to her chemotherapy except that she had lost hair that was natural. Last December, we were finally able to go out with other fellow co-teachers twice after Christmas and after New Year’s day last January. We were so glad she had regained weight and strength. And hair too!

Saw her again last June but in late August, she stopped answering our messages. It turned out that her cancer had metastasized to her lungs and liver. When I came to see her October 7, the first thing she told me was for me to “allow her to die”. According to her brothers and elder sister, she had also asked them for “permission to die” earlier that night because she said, she was already tired and was ready to go back to God.

Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, 06 November 2023.

It was not the first time somebody had asked me a “permission to die”, especially since I have become a hospital chaplain two years ago. But, I must confess, in all instances, there was always hesitancy on my part in giving “permission to die” especially when those dying are close to me like friends and relatives. In fact, the first person who asked me “permission to die” was my best friend from high school seminary. I just cried, said nothing when he calmly told me he was ready to go.

That scene remains vivid to my memory to this day, including the many lessons he had taught about life and dying.

By the way, let me put it clear that what we are referring here as giving “permission to die” is allowing death take its natural course, not mercy killing or euthanasia which is intrinsically evil we should never allow.

In my 25 years in the priesthood, two years as hospital chaplain since 2021, I have always felt the process of dying as a “grace-filled moment” too like in the birth of an infant or recovery of a sick person. Both the dying and their family and friends are blessed when death approaches or had come, like when Jesus visited Martha and Mary four days after the death of their brother Lazarus. That scene of Jesus speaking to Martha before bringing Lazarus back to life assures us of how God had turned death into a blessing in Christ: Jesus told her, “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (Jn. 11:25-26)

Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, 06 November 2023.

If we believe Jesus and his words to Martha, we too shall find him coming to us when a beloved is dying, especially when they ask us that “permission to die” which is not actually a permission per se because only God decides when we are going to die.

When patients ask for “permission to die”, they are actually bidding us goodbye. Dying people always knew when they had to go because they have already accepted the reality. This is very noticeable at the serenity, even of joy, on their face. Despite their sickness, dying patients who have truly made peace with God and had given up everything to Him always have that grace of composure like Jesus when he died on the Cross, crying his same prayer, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit” (Lk.23:46).

Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, September 2021.

Giving “permission to die” is a grace from God He gives to relatives and friends to accept and embrace that difficult reality.

“Permitting” our loved ones to die is to assure them of our love and forgiveness of their sins against us. It is our final act of love for them when we assist them to that great passageway onto eternity like when we would lead our guests out to the door to ensure them our separation is just temporary until we meet again soon.

Due to this great amount of love in our final goodbyes, some people sometimes “fake” their dying moments, creating a “drama” in asking “permission to die” when actually, they are not yet ready to die but merely demanding love and care from family and friends. One clear sign is they tend to be more cerebral than cordial, becoming bitter and angry than ever. Even amid sufferings, they think more of themselves than feel others around them. Like the boy who cried wolf, they have not yet really seen death approaching because most likely, they have not yet faced life and living truly. Coming to terms with death is coming to terms with life. When loved ones “fake” their dying, what they really seek is how to live fully and responsibly, to be their true self. But that’s a different topic…

Photo by author, Malagos Orchid Farm, Davao City, 2017.

Death is the most terrifying moment in life because we do not know what’s next, where we are going. That is why, when people truly mean that they have accepted death, that is also when they have accepted life in its fullness. They do not reason out. They just feel God and those around them. Most of all, they have peace within amid pains.

The same thing happens with us relatives and friends of the dying. We feel their sense of peace within, affecting us, infecting us. Hence, we get lost at how to express our giving them of that permission to die. Very often, we cry because our hearts overflow with love. When we feel their seeking of permission to die is genuine, our mouths and tongues are shut, incapable of expressing our love for them that is diverted into our eyes as tears, bursting forth like waters from a collapsed dam that cleanse also us of our fears and sadness at our impending loss.

Finally, giving permission to die to our beloved is an expression of our faith in God, affirming we all came from God and would someday go home to God in heaven. Thus, giving permission to die is actually to comfort – literally, “to give strength to” – the dying of their faith in God while facing their final tests and temptations in life, assuring them that soon, we shall join them in eternal joy.

Many times, our family and friends suffer so much before death because of our refusal to let them go too. We keep on holding them back that terrify them in making the great crossover. Giving them permission to die is easing and sharing their fears so they can finally let go and let God, that is, die – the meaning of the letter “d” that stands between the words “go” and “God”. According to the prayer by St. Francis of Assisi, it is in dying when we are born into eternal life. Amen.

*Aside from All Saints’ Day and All Souls Day, the whole month of November is a traditional time for visiting the graves of our loved ones. Go and offer them prayers, especially that “permission to die” if you are still holding them and have not yet let them go.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Our hallowed hiddenness

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 31 October 2023

Whether you choose to celebrate Halloween in its truest sense which is the Christian and sacred celebration of All Saints or, the popular and pagan manner that is scary or spooky, November first reminds us always of things that are hidden and not seen.

What is really scary whenever November first approaches is the insistence of so many benighted souls including many Christians who highlight the erroneous pagan practice of dressing evil when halloween literally means “hallowed eve” or “holy evening” before the day set aside for all “holy souls” already in heaven we call “saints”. Any soul who enters heaven is considered a “saint”, that is, holy even if not recognized or canonized by the Church.

Remember the old Our Father translation when we used to say “Hallowed be thy name”? That’s it! Hallowed is the old English for holy. Where people got that idea of halloween as evil is clearly from the devil! And part of that sinister ploy by the devil in making evil funny and acceptable – and visible – is happening in the social media where everything must be seen, shown and exposed. Notice the expression “as seen on TV” to sell and market products while Facebook users brag their rule of thumb “show pictures or it never happened”.

Not everything can be seen and must be seen and shown. Recall how Genesis portrayed Adam and Eve hiding in shame, covering themselves with leaves after eating the forbidden fruit but these days, which could be the second phase of the Fall, men and women are not ashamed at all of their sins and scandals that instead of hiding, they make known to everyone deeds better kept in private, saying words better kept unsaid. They have absolutized the truth, baring all in total disregard of persons’ dignity and unity of the community. We have lost decency because we have also lost our sense of hiddenness, of privacy through silence and stillness.

Photo by author, sunrise at the Pacific from Katmon Nature Sanctuary & Beach Resort in Infanta, Quezon, 04 March 2023.

Hiddenness is a sacred presence where each of us can be all by one’s self focused on God who is the root of our being and existence no matter how one may call Him.  St. John Paul II said in one of his writings that God created man first to be alone with Him.  And that is how it will be to each of us in the end: we die alone. With God.

We all have this gift of hiddenness within each one of us. This we experience in our desires to be still, to go to the mountains or anywhere for a retreat or introspection, for some “me” time to rediscover and find one’s self anew. 

Hiddenness is the passageway to the great gifts of silence and stillness that everyone needs to maintain balance in this highly competitive world filled with so much noise where everybody is talking, including cars and elevators.  Compounding the problem of noise within and outside us are the cameras everywhere that entertain us and safeguard our well-being. But, are we really safer these days with all the CCTV’s and Face ID’s we use?

From forbes.com.

Many times, we have actually stripped ourselves of the innate mystery of being human, of the beauty and gift of personhood that some have tried to reveal using the camera but failed because we are beyond seeing. We do not notice how the cameras actually rob us of respect when unconsciously we give ourselves away to the world with our photos and videos spreading far without our knowing. Worst, we have allowed the camera to invade our hiddenness without us realizing that its effects backfire to us as we rarely have the time to analyze the possible outcomes of our photos and videos that usually tend to show what is negative and bad than what is positive and good about us. Our fascination with cameras perfectly capture our Filipino term palabas that literally means “outward”, a mere show without substance inside (loob). As a result of these sounds and images saturating us daily, the more we have become confused and lost because we do not have our grounding or “bearing” found only in hiddenness.

“In our society we are inclined to avoid hiddenness. We want to be seen and acknowledged. We want to be useful to others and influence the course of events. But as we become visible and popular, we quickly grow dependent on people and their responses and easily lose touch with God, the true source of our being. Hiddenness is the place of purification. In hiddenness we find our true selves.”

Fr. Henri Nouwen
Photo by author, Anvaya Cove in Morong, Bataan, July 2023.

We need to regain our hallowed hiddenness if we wish to grow and mature truly as persons – emotionally, psychologically and spiritually.  With the phone and TV always around us even in the church, everybody and everything has become so ordinary and cheap. 

Regaining our hiddenness is learning to put our technology in its proper place to be grounded in God in silence, the one commodity that has become so scarce these days since the invention of the Sony Walkman more than 40 years ago that spawned all these gadgets all over us now.

Silence is the language of God which leads us to Him and to our true selves. Every communication by God is always preceded by silence, something we have refused to learn as the most basic requirement of every communication. No wonder, we quarrel a lot, ending up more confused than ever because we never listen to others in silence. We never dialogue but simply talk, talk, and talk.

Genesis tells us in the beginning when God created everything, there was silence before He said, “Let there be light” while the fourth gospel solemnly tells us, “In the beginning was the Word… And the Word became flesh” (Jn.1:1, 14). Both instances evoke the beauty and majesty of God in grand silence.

All books in the Old Testament especially those of Psalms and of Job teem with many instances of God in silence amid every sunrise and sunset, in the gentle breeze and vast skies and oceans. In the New Testament, all four evangelists reported nothing Jesus said and did in childhood until the age 30 except for his lost and finding in the temple when 12 years old; Jesus was totally silent all those “hidden years” of his life in preparation for his ministry that lasted only three years, accomplishing so much whereas we speak all our lives and still end up empty. Most of all, the evangelists tell us too how Jesus frequently invited his disciples to a deserted place to pray, be silent and rest to be in communion with God his Father.

Hiddenness is God’s mode of presence that cannot be captured nor described in human terms. That is why He is hidden. It is not that God is hiding from us but He is inviting us to be intimately close with Him to exclusively and personally experience Him, be filled with Him.

Photo by Ms. Jo Villafuerte in Atok, Benguet, 01 September 2019.

It was the same thing Jesus did on Easter, remaining hidden from the disciples. When he finally appeared to Mary Magdalene who tried to touch him, Jesus stopped her to signal to her and to us all of the new level of relating with the Risen Lord in hiddenness. In all Easter stories, we are told how the disciples fell silent whenever Jesus appeared to them. In Emmaus, after the breaking of bread, the two disciples finally recognized Jesus who immediately vanished too! Why? Because Jesus wanted his disciples including us today to follow him personally in his hiddenness to find him and ourselves too.

Appearances or images and noise in life are very fleeting. Very often, the most significant moments and insights we have in life are those that come from our long periods of silence, of prayers and soul-searching.

This November 1 and 2 as we remember all those who have left us in this world, let us keep its sacred origins:  All Saints Day for those souls already in heaven and All Souls’ Day for those who have departed but still being purified in the purgatory.  Both dates invite us to “hide” in prayers, in silent remembering to experience God and our departed loved ones in the most intimate and personal manner without the gadgets and things that numb us of their presence. Amen. Have a blessed All Saints’ and All Souls’ Days!

Slavery & separation that are good

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday in the Twenty-Ninth Week of Ordinary Time, Year I, 26 October 2023
Romans 6:19-23   <*((((><  +  ><))))*>   Luke 12:49-53
Photo by Dr. Mylene A. Santos, MD, 2022.
Your words, O Lord, 
today sound old, even archaic
but they evoke so beautiful
feelings within that lead us
into deeper realities we often
ignore and take for granted:
slavery and separation.

But now that you have been freed from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit that you have leads to sanctification, and its end is eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 6:22-23
Many times we wrongly
choose to become slaves of sin
because of the belief that is when
we are most free in doing 
whatever we want,
whatever we like,
whatever we desire
but always, we are proven wrong,
sadly wrong,
disastrously wrong;
being free O God is being
tied up to you,
being your slave
being at home with
what is true and good;
your laws and teachings
are not burdens but are
in fact what lead us to true freedom
without guilt,
without darkness,
without shame.

Most of all, 
it is the slavery that leads
us to life and fulfillment in
Jesus Christ who had come
to liberate us from slavery to sin.
In the same manner,
to be your slave, O God,
is to be on your side,
to separate from those 
against Jesus;
it is always painful
like every separation
but what makes it a good kind
of separation like slavery to you, God,
is how the fires of Christ's love
and mercy purify us into
better persons that enable us
to prosper,
grow,
and mature.

In the power of the
Holy Spirit,
let us choose always
slavery to you, dear Father,
and separation with you, dear Jesus
lest we become like the chaff
which the wind drives away
(Ps.1:4).  Amen.

Relationship is everything

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday in the Twenty-Eighth Week of Ordinary Time, Year I, 20 October 2023
Romans 4:1-8   ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'>   Luke 12:1-7
Photo by author, Liputan Island, Meycauayan City, Bulacan, 31 December 2021.
Our loving God and Father,
help us learn St. Paul's beautiful
teaching today about your 
righteousness and our justification -
that, essentially, everything 
in this life is our relationship with you
and with one another.
You justified and redeemed us
in your Son Jesus whom you
sent to restore that relationship with you
broken by sin in Adam and Eve; 
to renew and make that relationship 
work, you made us new in Christ
to make us worthy before you
and with one another in your grace. 
How wonderful as St. Paul explained
that long before your Laws came,
that relationship has always been there
wondrously expressed most especially
by Abraham in his deep faith in you;
faith is a relationship which Abraham
proved thrice to you:
when he obeyed your command for him
to leave his family and city to go to
the land you would show him;
when he believed even in his old age
you would give him a son in his wife
Sarah to become the father of all nations;
and when Isaac was finally born 
as he grew up, Abraham willingly
gave him up to you when you asked
him to be offered.
In all three instances,
Abraham never sinned to you
because he upheld and
valued so much your relationship 
with him.
Help us, God,
to be like Abraham in
upholding and preserving
most dearly this relationship
with you and with one another
we keep and nurture in faith.

For what does the Scripture say? Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness. A worker’s wage is credited not as a gift, but as something due. But when one does not work, yet believes in the one who justifies the ungodly, his faith is credited as righteousness.

Romans 4:3-5
Forgive us,
merciful Father, 
for being so proud,
always proving our worth
with all our works without
realizing that you have done
everything in our favor,
that there is nothing we can do
nor we may do for us to be saved
in ourselves, by ourselves
except to believe in you like
Abraham; let us not be hypocrites
like the Pharisees who do not
realize that everything is revealed
in you, including our thoughts;
let us remember that sin is
more than the evil acts we do
but most of all, our lack of faith
in you that we destroy 
our beautiful relationships with
you and with one another.
Amen.

Life is not a dress rehearsal

The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Twenty-Eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Cycle A, 15 October 2023
Isaiah 25:6-10 ><}}}}*> Philippians 4:12-14, 19-20 ><}}}}*> Matthew 22:1-14
Photo by Mr. Jay Javier in Taal, Batangas, 15 February 2014.

I grew up in a generation when dressing properly – meaning, decently – was deeply inculcated both at home and the school. It has always been considered in our time as a sign of maturity when we come properly attired in every occasion.

Now, those days are gone along with the expression “Sunday’s best” when sneakers are paired with formal suits and worn even in weddings! Dressing has become so relative with total disregard for basic fashion sense and worst of all, without any sense of propriety at all in the name of personal comfort and style as well as individuality. That culture on “liberal” or “liberated” dressing has encroached into the church with priests refusing to wear the proper garments and dress as required by Code of Canon law. How ironic that while the lay people appreciate us priests dressed properly for the liturgy and ministry, the harshest insults and negative reactions against it come from some priests who argue using the hot weather as an excuse. Many priests have subscribed to the lame excuse of people that clothes do not make us who we are, that there is much more beneath the clothing we wear of who we really are.

True but not absolutely because what we wear, how we look outside is indicative of who we are, what we value, what we believe in. Dress speaks a lot about ourselves whether we like it or not as the Lord’s parable this Sunday teaches us.

The servants went out into the streets and gathered all they found, bad and good alike, and the hall was filled with guests. But when the king came in to meet the guests he saw a man there not dressed in a wedding garment. He said to him, ‘My friend, how is it that you came in here without a wedding garment?’ But he was reduced to silence. Then the king said to his attendants, ‘Bind his hands and feet, and cast him into the darkness outside, where there will be wailing and grinding of teeth.’ Many are invited, but few are chosen.”

Matthew 22:11-14
Photo by Fr. RA Valmadrid, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, 13 October 2023.

We now come to the third and final series of parables addressed by Jesus Christ directly to his enemies, the chief priests and elders of the people while teaching at the temple area in Jerusalem to underscore to them the need to reform their lives and be converted to his good news of salvation like the tax collectors and prostitutes.

See how in today’s parable some semblances with the parables of the two sons and wicked tenants of the past two weeks to show us God’s loving patience in doing everything to make us come to him like the subjects of the king with all the chances to come to his son’s wedding banquet.

And like with the parables of the past two Sundays, Matthew makes again a crucial twist in today’s parable that can be sufficiently ended in that part when the king was enraged by the continued refusal of his guests to come to his son’s wedding banquet that he ordered them all killed and instead extended his invitation to everyone in the streets.

The wedding banquet is heaven like the vineyard in the parables of the past two Sundays.

But it is not only referring to heaven at the end of time but also speaks so well of the here and now – the present life we live as citizens of the kingdom of God in Jesus Christ. Rejecting the invitation to come to the meal which as an expression of our citizenship in God’s kingdom is an act of disloyalty and treason against him.

Photo by Arch. Philip Santiago, Hearts of Jesus and Mary parish, Malolos City, 2022.

When we were baptized, we became citizens of the kingdom of God. We do our “pledge of allegiance” to God as his citizens every time we pray and most especially celebrate Mass which is just half of the whole deal of being citizens of his kingdom! Like in being Filipinos or whatever nationality we have, we must live up to our citizenship in God’s kingdom by being good and holy. That is the wedding dress referred to in the parable, the life we lead as children and citizens of God and his kingdom.

Jesus invites us today to face squarely the uncomfortable issues that prevent us from being his good and faithful disciples and citizens of God’s kingdom. Many times we are like those invited guests in the parable who allowed something else in their lives like their wealth and possession, businesses and worldly pursuits become more important than their allegiance to the King. Every time we sin, every time we skip the Sunday Mass, that is when we have our new God and King that may be our very selves, gadgets, vices, or the malls we frequent more than the church!

Here we find a deepening in Jesus Christ’s invitation to conversion into conforming our lives into him. St. Paul made a lot of beautiful imageries of “putting on Jesus Christ” as our new clothes and garment which we have retained in the Rite of Baptism when the newly baptized is clothed with the white dress. See how the man caught by the king fell silent when confronted because there was no excuse at all at not wearing the wedding dress in the banquet. The same thing is true with us today. We have no excuse for not being dressed, for not being conformed in Jesus Christ in our lives as his disciples. Everyday he gives us the opportunities of being conformed to him through our daily conversions through prayers and good works. God does not expect us to wear extravagant nor expensive clothes for his wedding banquet; just a clean and decent clothes are enough. Nobody is perfect.

Photo by Dra. Mylene A. Santos, MD at Tagalag, Valenzuela City, 13 September 2023.

One of the things I used to enjoy in my school and seminary days were joining stage plays. Yes, I love acting but I just don’t know if acting (and singing) love me. Nonetheless, one of our most dreaded moments before the actual play was always the dress rehearsal when everything is considered as the “real thing”, the real play as our teaches and nuns have insisted when we were supposed to have memorized our lines and cues.

But, as I grew and matured, I realized that life is not a dress rehearsal at all; each day is an actual “play”, a “live” presentation where we must “perform” or “act” so well. Yes, we are all required to memorize our lines and cues in life but many times, we forget them. Nobody is perfect. And here lies the immense love and kindness of God to us: he allows us to improvise for our selves in case we have forgotten our lines just like those people instantly invited to the wedding banquet of the King’s son. They were able to improvise to make it to the banquet hall except for that one who came not dressed for the occasion. He was silent because he was so lazy to improvise, to find ways like the chief priests and elders in the time of the Lord. Until now, many of us make a lot of excuses and alibis for not being conformed in Christ, from the ordinary excuse of being “difficult” to the most absurd that “I am only human” or tao lamang, mahina at marupok. Keep in mind St. Paul’s words in the second reading, “I can do all things in him who strengthens me… My God will supply whatever you need, in accord with his glorious riches in Christ Jesus” (Phil.4:13, 19).

Photo by Ka Ruben, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, 2022.

Every Sunday we are invited to celebrate with others the coming of Jesus and the salvation he has won for us. This wedding banquet is the Sunday Mass we celebrate, a fulfillment of the first reading from Isaiah of that mountain where “the Lord of hosts will provide for all peoples a feast of rich food and choice wines, juicy, rich food and pure, choice wines” (Is. 25:6). In the Holy Eucharist, we have the choicest food and drinks – the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ – given to us to nourish us and keep us strong in this journey of life into eternity in heaven with the Father.

How amazing that nothing is really imposed upon us in coming to this banquet of the Lord in the Eucharist that is totally free of charge except that we have to come properly dressed on the inside, of being conformed in him.

But please, let’s get dressed also on the outside. No need to wear expensive and beautiful clothes. Just proper and clean ones are more than enough. A good rule of thumb we can rely on is this: God has blessed me tremendously this week and I am coming to celebrate with him, for him. How do I look to to express to him my gratitude and appreciation to his wondrous gifts? Amen. It is a Sunday, go to Mass!

Jerusalem, O Jerusalem!

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Tuesday in the Twenty-Sixth Week of Ordinary Time, Year I, 03 October 2023
Zechariah 8:20-23   <*(((>< + ><)))*>   Luke 9:51-56
The old city of Jerusalem with the Golden Dome Mosque seen from the inside of the Church Dominus Flevit (the Lord Cried); photo by author, May 2017.
Today O Dear God
our loving Father,
I pray for those going
through many difficulties
and sufferings in life;
those travelling the road
to Jerusalem,
even inside Jerusalem
already, one with Jesus
without them knowing 
carrying their Cross
to the Calvary.

When the days for Jesus being taken up were fulfilled, he resolutely determined to journey to Jerusalem.

Luke 9:51
Open our eyes,
open our hearts, 
dear Father to recognize
Jesus our companion 
to Jerusalem,
in Jerusalem;
help us to be "resolute"
like Christ in going to
Jerusalem to face 
Passion and Death
to eventually realize our
Resurrection in him
 too! 
I pray, dear God,
for those giving up,
have given up to
continue the journey
to Jerusalem:  those
who have been living
all these years with
dialysis or chemotherapy,
those with never-ending
rehabilitation due to stroke
and other accidents,
those living daily with
medications and motivations
to fight depression,
to resist suicide;
those nursing so much pains
and hurts within not only 
due to physical trauma but
especially emotional and
spiritual traumas;
Lord, I pray also for their
caregivers, their family
and loved ones so 
often pushed to the limits
physically, emotionally,
and spiritually; console and
comfort them with the warmth
of the Holy Spirit, strengthen them
and assure them of your love;
tap their shoulders and whisper
to them they are doing well.

I pray dear Father
for those grieving,
those still grappling with
the loss of a loved one;
those suddenly thrown into 
emptiness within and without
with the death of a wife or
husband, a mother or a father,
a brother or a sister;
Jesus Christ knew so well the
deep hurt and emptiness every
death creates; accompany them
in the eerie silence and darkness
of suddenly not seeing
nor hearing, not embracing
nor serving a beloved departed.
God, 
life is a journey;
thank you in giving us Jesus
our companion; like
the two disciples going
back to Emmaus in
sadness and disappointments,
ignite our hearts anew with
Christ's loving presence,
to go to you, to seek you
right in our hearts,
our little Jerusalem
until we come to you in heaven,
the new Jerusalem.
Amen.
Facade of the Church of the Holy Sepulchre where one finds inside another church enclosing the very site of the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ; photo by author, Jerusalem, May 2017.

Consider your ways!

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday, Feast of St. Lorenzo Ruiz & Companion Martyrs, 28 September 2023
Haggai 1:1-8   ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'>   Luke 9:7-9
Photo by Mr. Jay Javier, August 2023.
Teach me,
O God our Father,
to be sincere and true,
humble and docile
to heed your call 
today to "consider
my ways" in relating
with you and others:

Now thus says the Lord of hosts: Consider your ways! You have sown so much, but have brought in little; you have eaten, but have not satisfied; you have drunk, but have not been exhilarated; have clothed yourselves, but not been warmed; and he who earned wages earned them for a bag with holes in it. Thus says the Lord of hosts: Consider your ways! Go up into the hill country; bring timber, and build the house that I may take pleasure in it and receive my glory, says the Lord.

Haggai 1:5-8
I confess, Lord,
so many times in life
I have been thinking more of
myself and less of you,
less of others,
 and yet,
the more I get
everything and all
the attention, the more
I feel lost and empty
because I do not have you.
How true are your 
words to Haggai, Father:
it is not really working 
on so much but doing
everything for you and 
in you; it is not simply
eating but also feeding 
my soul that is truly
filling; more than drinking
is the reason for celebrating;
better than clothes is
the warmth of another
person; and better than
all the fruits of our labor
are the treasures of
kindness we save
in heaven that is never
lost.
Let us consider
our ways in the light
of Jesus Christ; 
like Herod, many times
we just keep on trying
to see him without 
any firm resolve 
to follow him like
St. Lorenzo Ruiz and
companion martyrs
we celebrate today.

You are so kind,
O God; all you ask us
is to consider our ways
to become witnesses 
of your love without any need
to shed our blood
like St. Lorenzo and
company; make us see,
dear Father, the life 
and joys you offer us
freely, compared to
the ways of the world
that is misleading
and utterly empty,
lacking in meaning.
Amen.

Pick up the pieces

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday in the Twenty-fifth Week of Ordinary Time, Year I, 25 September 2023
Ezra 1:1-6   ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + >]]]]'>   Luke 8:16-18
Photo by author, view from Jerusalem temple, May 2019.
Thank you,
dearest God our Father,
in giving us this new day
to pick up the pieces of
our lives, to become better,
to be well, to be fulfilled in you
through Christ Jesus.

Let me claim this life,
Father; let me own 
and embrace this gift
of life to make it good;
let me be focus with 
the present and what lies
ahead, to let go but learn from
the past.  Let me live 
the life you have meant 
for me so that when finally
I have reached the end 
of this journey, you may take
my whole life as my only offering
to you, dear God.
As the psalmist says today,
"The Lord has done great things
for us; we are glad indeed.  
Restore our fortunes, O Lord...
those who sow in tears shall reap
rejoicing.  Although they go forth
weeping, carrying the seed to be sown,
they shall come back rejoicing,
carrying their sheaves."
(Ps. 126:3,5-6).
May your word guide us
as we live our lives, Jesus;
let us shine like lamps to make
you known to everyone,
that you alone O Lord is 
our life and meaning,
our only fulfillment.
We pray also today
for those rebuilding their
lives - those who are finally
set free by all kinds of bondage
to sin and evil, those who have
finally decided on their own
to choose you, to do what is
good, those who have finally
broke free from vices and
every kind of slavery this world
has continued to surreptitiously
promote to hide its sinister plans;
may we find the "goodwill" of 
the many other "King Cyrus of Persia"
you continue to send us, Father, 
so we too, like your exiled people
of old, may start to pick up the
pieces of our lives 
and rebuild our
lives in you again.
Amen.