When we do not know what “we want”

The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Twenty-ninth Sunday in Ordinary Time, Cycle B, 20 October 2024
Isaiah 53:10-11 ><}}}}*> Hebrews 4:14-16 ><}}}}*> Mark 10:35-45
The Jewish Cemetery of Mount of Olives facing the Eastern Gate of Jerusalem where the Messiah is believed would pass through when He comes, exactly where Jesus entered on Palm Sunday over 2000 years ago (photo by author taken in May 2019).

Jesus Christ’s three predictions of His coming Passion, Death, and Resurrection punctuate Mark’s narration of the Lord’s journey to Jerusalem. They were already fast approaching Jerusalem when Jesus revealed His third prediction of His Pasch to His followers.

According to Mark, the Twelve and the crowd were “amazed and were afraid” after hearing for the third time Christ’s coming Passion, Death, and Resurrection.

Photo by author, Via Dolorosa in Jerusalem, April 2017.

And this was the prevailing mood among the followers of the Lord as they approached Jerusalem; beginning today and next Sunday, Mark reminds us of the need to have a clear sight and understanding of Jesus and His mission so that we may not be blinded by fame and glory in following Him like the brothers James and John:

James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Jesus and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” He replied, “What do you wish me to do for you?” They answered him, “Grant that in your glory we may sit one at your right and the other at your left.” Jesus said to them, “You do not know what you are asking… but to sit at my right or at my left is not mine to give but is for those for whom it has been prepared” (Mark 10:35-38, 40).


Jesus said to them, 
"You do not know what you are asking."

Photo by author, Betania Tagaytay, 2018.

Whoa…! We might all exclaim with some indignation like the other ten Apostles upon hearing this request by James and John, two of the most intimate friends of Jesus with Simon Peter.

Were they trying to ease their worries and fears that they made the request without thinking it so well, a case of mema, me masabi lang? Or, do they really understand nothing at all of the Lord’s teachings especially last Sunday of the need to let go of our possessions to enter eternal life?

Whatever may be the reason, we could just imagine the treachery of the two who left the group behind, trying not to be noticed by the ten, and approached Jesus who was walking ahead. They have both belittled Jesus who reads the minds and the hearts of everyone. And most sad is the fact that many times, we too act like James and John.

Oh yes! We know so well of the sufferings and trials, of the “cup we have to drink and baptism we have to undergo” Jesus told the brothers. Very much like the two, we also know Christ always triumphs! Jesus never fails!

And that’s the crux of the matter here not only with James and John but with us: we bet on Jesus like in gambling casinos for we know Jesus wins all the time, hoping for some rewards following His glory.

James and John like us today believed so much in Jesus that despite His coming Passion and Death, they knew as we do that He would rise again and be King. Long before the Passion of Jesus had begun, still far from entering Jerusalem, James and John were already betting on the success and glory of Christ because they wanted a guarantee of a reward. It was a sort reminding Jesus they have always been with Him since the beginning like Peter last Sunday who bragged about having left everything to follow Him.

Are we not like them? It is the same attitude found among many of us not only in politics and government but even at home, in school and offices, or the church! Be the first to register to make it known how well qualified we are for commendations and rewards simply because of being in the company of every journey or advocacy or struggle.

It is the tragedy that happens even in our faith journey as Christians when we are blinded by so many worldly things about Jesus whom we see merely as a miracle-worker or worst, an ATM who never runs out of cash. We believe in Jesus as the Son of God, all-powerful and merciful who can do everything, especially the impossible as He had assured us last Sunday but many times, we do not know what we are asking like James and John.

When the ten heard this, they became indignant at James and John. Jesus summoned them and said to them, “You know that those who are recognized as rulers over the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones make their authority over them felt. But it shall not be with so among you. Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you will be your servant; whoever wishes to be first among you you will be slave of all. For the Son of God did not come to be served but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:41-45).

Photo by author, wailing wall of Jerusalem, May 2019.

Jesus clarifies today with us that His glory has nothing in common whatsoever with those things we gain here on earth by claiming our rights or resorting to undue favors, by competing with others to get the better of them or even push them away or step on them to crush them for us to be on top.

We cannot be Christ’s disciples if we are preoccupied with rewards. We serve Jesus because we love that we want to be with Him in eternal life. And in loving Him, we serve lovingly others without expecting anything in return simply because we love.

See how in calling together the Twelve, Jesus reminded them and us today of His central teaching of becoming like a child, confidently entrusting everything into the Father’s hands, exactly like Him, the Suffering Servant of God referred to by the Prophet Isaiah in the first reading who “gave his life as a ransom for many” (Mk.10:45).

Photo by author, 2021.

Jesus reminds us this Sunday that love alone – like His self-sacrificing love on the Cross – is the basis of our relationships with each other, unlike the world where relations are based on power and domination.

Noteworthy too is the reminder of the author of the Letter to the Hebrews today about Jesus our High Priest who entered the sanctuary of heaven through the Cross so that we may be saved and receive mercy from the Father.

What else do we want Jesus to do for us when He had done everything for our salvation? Let us pray for a clearer vision of Jesus, to always see and find Him in our lives so that we desire only Him and share only Him. And follow Him like the blind Bartimaeus next Sunday. Amen. Have a blessed week ahead!

Led by the Holy Spirit

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday in the Twenty-eighth Week of Ordinary Time Year II, 16 October 2024
Galatians 5:18-25 ><))))*> + ><))))*> + ><))))*> Luke 11:42-46
Photo by author, Fatima Ave., Valenzuela City, 25 July 2024.
Lead and guide us,
O Most Holy Spirit;
set us free from "the works
of the flesh: immorality,
impurity, licentiousness,
idolatry, sorcery, hatreds,
rivalry, jealousy, outbursts of fury,
acts of selfishness, dissensions,
factions" (Galatians 5:19-20);
cleanse our nation now facing
the realities of the truth of what we
have long suspected of filth and evil
that have shrouded the past
administration's drug war;
so many lives were lost
and destroyed not only by
the deaths but all the lies
that were glorified;
be the courage and strength,
O Holy Spirit, of those finally
given the chance to stand for what is true
so that never again such reign of
darkness and terror be repeated.
Woe to us
and everyone who continue
to overlook the good of others!

Let your Spirit, dear Jesus,
bear fruit in us with "love, joy,
peace, patience, kindness, generosity,
faithfulness, gentleness, self-control"
(Galatians 5:22-23); fills us with your
Spirit today, Jesus, so we may be
more loving, thinking always of the
good of others above all.
Amen.
Photo by author, Fatima Ave., Valenzuela City, 25 July 2024.

Faith working through love

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Tuesday, Memorial of St. Teresa of Avila, Virgin & Doctor of the Church, 15 October 2024
Galatians 5:1-6 ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> Luke 11:37-41
Photo by author, somewhere in Pampanga, August 2024.
What a wonderful Saint 
You have gifted us today,
dear Jesus in St. Teresa of Avila;
what a wonderful saint
we need so much these days
to guide us in your Church,
one who has "faith working
through love" (Galatians 5:6).
In this time when people
laugh at our traditions of old,
when liberalism is so adored,
modern thoughts highly praised
and so embraced that many of us
are so concerned in "cleansing the outside
of the cup and dish while inside us are
filled with plunder and evil" and pride,
so highly speaking of freedom, inclusivity
and sensitivity that in the process
we forget You, Jesus;
like St. Teresa of Avila,
lead us back to our faith
working through love that seeks
You in deep prayer by detaching
ourselves from the trappings of
this modern world like social media's
very alluring style of story-telling
that's empty inside because
of all outside as "palabas" -
one big show,
a circus.
We pray to You, Jesus,
through St. Teresa of Avila
for the grace of a contemplative spirit
in a world so active that frees us
from the slavery of one's own passions
and fantasies so that we can be
more free to become a loving person
who sees You in others we must serve.
Amen.
Photo by author, 21 August 2024, St. Scholastica Spirituality Center, Tagaytay City.

And the greatest is love…

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday in the Twenty-fourth Week of Ordinary Time, Year II, 18 September 2024
1 Corinthians 12:31-13:13 <*{{{{>< + ><}}}}*> Luke 7:31-35
Photo by author, 20 August 2024.
What a lovely Wednesday
today, O God our merciful Father!
Thank you for this wonderful moment,
thank you for your presence,
thank you for the gift of life.
Thank you for the love.
St. Paul tells us today
that love is the greatest
of all your gifts,
O God
because no amount of
goodness and giftedness
will ever be worthy
without love.
And what is love?

Love is.
That is,
being present always.
Never absent.

Love happens in the present moment,
never in the past nor the future.

That is why
love is patient,
love is kind,
love is not jealous,
love is not pompous,
love is not inflated,
love is not rude,
love is not self-interested,
love is not quick-tempered,
love does not brood over injury,
love does not rejoice over wrongdoing,
love rejoices with the truth,
love bears all things,
love believes all things,
love hopes all things,
love endures all things
(1 Corinthians 13:4-7)
because precisely,
love is always in present tense.
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Jesus said to the crowds: “Then to what shall I compare the people of this generation? What are they like? They are the children who sit in the marketplace and call to one another, ‘We played the flute for you, but you did not dance. We sang a dirge, but you did not weep'” (Luke 7:31-32).

Forgive us, dear Jesus
for being loveless,
always missing
every moment to love,
missing every chance
to be kind to others,
for desiring and having
always the best intentions
but never having
even the the smallest
kind deeds for anyone;
let us live in every present moment,
that thin line between
here and now
called present
which is the other word
for gift.

Let us live,
O Lord,
in love,
finding and cherishing
the gift of every presence
right here,
right now.
By being
a gift too
to others
in You.
Amen.
Photo by Skyler Ewing on Pexels.com

Omnia Omnibus

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday, Memorial of St. John Chrysostom, Bishop & Doctor of Church, 13 September 2024
1 Corinthians 9:16-19, 22-27 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Luke 6:39-42
Photo by Mr. Jim Marpa, 2018.
Lord Jesus Christ,
help me be like St. Paul,
a man truly free:
free from slavery of sin,
free from selfishness,
free from what others may say
so that I may be truly
free to love,
free to serve,
free to be my true self.

Although I am free in regard to all, I have made myself a slave to all so as to win over as many as possible. I have become all things to all (omnia omnibus), to save at least some. All this I do for the sake of the Gospel, so that I too may have a share in it (1 Corinthians 9:19, 22-23).

In a world when most people
insist on their rights,
you teach us Lord through St. Paul
that inasmuch as the Church is the
your Body, then being a slave to others
is actually the path to true freedom,
making no room for anyone to insist
on his or her rights superseding
the common good;
most of all, in becoming
all things to all men like St. Paul,
then we acknowledge that
the strong and powerful
must take into consideration
the needs of the weak and powerless;
forgive us, Jesus,
for blindly leading others
to doom and more darkness;
forgive us, Jesus,
for always seeing defects of others
without recognizing our own;
cleanse us with your words
like St. John Chrysostom
who wrote us in one of his letters
on the way to his exile,
"Distance separates us,
but love unites us,
and death itself cannot divide us.
For though my body die,
my soul will live and
be mindful of my people."
Amen.
Photo by Paco Montoya on Pexels.com

Knowledge inflates, love builds

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday, Twenty-third Week in Ordinary Time, Year II, 12 September 2024
1 Corinthians 8:1-7, 11-13 <'[[[[>< + ><]]]]'> Luke 6:27-38
Photo by author, 2018.

Brothers and sisters: Knowledge inflates with pride, love builds up. If anyone supposes he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. But if one loves God, one is known by him (1 Corinthians 8:1-2).

O dear Jesus,
how lovely are your words
today through St. Paul;
so timely like during his time
when so many of us today
have become so proud and
arrogant in knowing so much
that have bloated their egos,
seeing only themselves
unmindful of others around them,
losing their personal touch,
forgetting their humanity,
miserably failing to love
at all.
Dear Jesus,
remind us anew of that
basic truth that true knowledge
is when we realize we know
so little,
that we must learn more
not only from books
but most of all from persons;
let us be more loving
so that we can build more
lasting and fulfilling relationships;
let us be more loving
so we can build more trust
and understanding when we
learn to love our enemies;
let us be more loving
so we can build more goodwill
and fellowship by being more
merciful like the Father in heaven;
let us be more loving
so we can build persons
than destroy them by being
non-judgmental of one another;
let us be more loving, Jesus,
so we can build and overflow
with more grace and gifts
as we give more of Jesus Christ.
Amen.

“Ephphatha!” – and he spoke plainly.

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 09 September 2024
Image from crossroadsinitiative.com.

And people brought to Jesus a deaf man who had a speech impediment and begged him to lay his hand on him. He took him off by himself away from the crowd. He put his finger into the man’s ears and, spitting, touched his tongue; then he looked up to heaven and groaned, and said to him, “Ephphatha!” – that is, “Be opened!” – And immediately the man’s ears were opened, his speech impediment was removed, and he spoke plainly (Mark 7:31-35).

Come, Lord Jesus,
take me away from the
routines and ordinariness
of this life that has become
my comfort zone;
touch me again
and speak to me that word
"Ephphatha"
so I may be opened
to speak plainly again:
let me speak plainly of love
not with eloquent words
but with sincere gestures
of care and kindness for the
other person;
let me speak plainly of love
not with technicalities of the laws
and rituals but with mercy
and compassion for a sinner
and those who have gone wayward;
let me speak plainly of love,
dear Jesus, like you,
not with letters and punctuations
but full of tenderness for the
weak and the sick;
let me speak plainly by
being open, giving all that I have
not only whatever is in excess;
let me speak plainly not with
advocacies so passionate
but simply doing what is right
and good to keep this world
clean and just;
let me speak plainly, O Lord,
with a ready smile to anyone,
wide arms to hug and welcome
family and friends,
warmth and joy to inspire those
lost and about to give up;
let me speak plainly, Jesus,
like you that in the end of this
life the heavens may open
as I pray, "into your hands
I commend my spirit."
Amen.
Photo by author, Chapel of St. Francis Xavier, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 20 March 2024.

Elijah & Jesus with “Lolo and the Kid”

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 13 August 2024
Photo from reddit.com

This is a rejoinder to my Sunday homily I posted here Saturday morning (https://lordmychef.com/2024/08/10/when-we-cry-this-is-enough-god-gives-us-more-than-enough-to-go-on/).

I had published my Sunday homily that Saturday morning when I decided to unwind by watching any movie on Netflix which I do only on weekends. So glad it was the first movie I saw, very related with the story of Prophet Elijah and Jesus Christ’s “Bread of Life Discourse” that Sunday.

First think I liked with Lolo and the Kid is its fast-paced story that revolved around the two characters played by veteran Joel Torre and GMA7’s famed Firefly star Euwenn Mikael Aleta.

Second thing so interesting with me is how Lolo and Kid have no proper names at all (I just learned Lolo’s name was Mario after reading the various write ups) maybe because they stand for all of us who are caught in this great race for money and material things but deep inside longing for the more essential and truly lasting in life like love. And people who love us too, who care for us, and would stand by us.

We are Lolo and Kid who many times have traded our principles for momentary satisfaction but despite our seemingly strong facades of pragmatism and “resourcefulness” or madiskarte as Lolo taught Kid in the movie, deep inside us is still our conscience where God dwells, telling us to pursue good and shun evil. Joel Torre perfectly portrayed this beautiful side in each one of us (with his Ilonggo accent) of keeping a conscience despite our sinfulness, like a soft shell we delicately keep whole and intact inside lest we lose everything in life.

Photo from de.flixable.com

Recall our first reading last Sunday about Elijah fleeing to the mountain from an army pursuing to kill him. Elijah felt a total failure like Lolo and us many times in life when after all our goodwill and love, we are dumped by the very people we care for.

Elijah went a day’s journey into the desert, until he came to a broom tree and sat beneath it. He prayed for death, saying: “This is enough, O Lord! Take my life, for I am no better than my fathers” (1 Kings 19:4).

In one of the scenes of Lolo and the Kid, we find Lolo crying, cursing everyone and murmuring just like in last Sunday’s gospel. As he tried to end his life with a knife, Lolo suddenly heard the cry of an infant from the heap of garbage around him. What a beautiful portrayal of that infant left in the trash like Jesus Christ born on a manger becoming the savior of Lolo, a definitive message of mercy and love from God after his apparent cry of “This is enough, Lord!”

How many times have we found ourselves in the same situation, often in less momentous ones than Elijah or any prophet and saint, crying out to God in the heavens “this is enough”?

But, what is also most true behind every cry of “this is enough” that we make, we continue to believe and to hope in God that there is still a way out of our plight. And very often like in the story of Elijah last Sunday and in that scene in Lolo and the Kid, God comes at the nick of time like that infant crying in the garbage heap, a reminder of life and beauty found within us despite all the dirt we may have around us.

From netflixlovers.it

Here we find the Kid, perfectly played by Euwenn like in Firefly, as the saving grace, the Christ-figure in the movie bringing salvation to Lolo. Kid was “the bread of life from heaven” who “fed” Lolo with life with its meaning and direction. And joy found in Kid, the image of Christ Jesus.

Now, joy according to Jesus at the Last Supper is like a woman at the pangs of childbirth (Jn.16:21-22); it is deeper than happiness. True joy is borne out of self-sacrifice, a fruit of self-denial, of loving somebody more than one’s self. This we find at the end of this moving film.

Now all grown up, Kid finally met again Lolo in the hospital a day after his college graduation. Kid brought Lolo while seated on a wheelchair to visit Taba (another character without a name), their suki in fencing. From there, they went to their usual stop, a videoke bar to eat and drink, singing repeatedly Kenny Roger’s Through the Years.

Then, Lolo died, singing the only tune he knew that summed their beautiful relationship.

Photo from list23.com.

After Lolo’s body was taken out of the videoke bar, Kid opened Lolo’s bag that had a tin can of biscuit filled with old photographs taken with their stolen Polaroid camera. The photos did not merely remind Kid of their happy times together but most especially when they were already apart!

Unknown to Kid, Lolo hid to take photos when he moved to his adoptive parents, from his first ever birthday party to his college graduation! Through the years, Lolo, like God, was always there, present in all of Kid’s milestones in life because he is truly loved.

I have never liked that song Through the Years even when it was a hit during our high school days in 1981 but since Saturday, I have been humming it silently, hearing it inside me as an LSS until now. We hear the song playing throughout the end of the movie with scenes of how Lolo secretly took Kid’s photos filled with love and joy amid the strong current of pain within he had to endure to be far and away yet so near to his beloved apo.

If the Kid is the Christ figure in this film, Lolo is the God-the-Father figure, the One who seems so far from us as if He does not care at all. In Lolo and the Kid, there is that message of God never leaving us wherever we may be, whether we are in the squalor of poverty and sin or in the purity and cleanliness of affluence and grace maybe. God like Lolo to Kid is always with us but never interferes, silently doing many things to ensure that despite our many faults and failures in life, we end up in Him and His love.


We go back to Elijah’s cry of “This is enough, Lord!”, our very same cry like Lolo in the movie.

It is a cry that is also a prayer coming from our innermost being when we feel so saddled with no one to unload our woes except to God – who after all is the very reason why we cry! Watch for Lolo’s soliloquy on this reality we often do.

Photo by author, James Alberione Center, QC, 08 August 2024.

It is a cry of faith so akin with love because to believe and to love go hand in hand. It is during that moment when we feel like giving up to God, crying “this is enough” when in reality we surrender everything to God because we have been caught up by Him that we cannot resist His attraction.

It is that moment when we feel so “fed up with life” but deep inside, we hear God telling us like Lolo with the cries of an infant or like Elijah with an angel instructing him, “Get up and eat, else the journey will be too long for you!” (1 Kings 19:7).

Yes, our life journey is still long but we have a companion in Jesus, our bread of life from heaven, nourishing us, strengthening us, teaching us that essential beauty of love found only in sharing one’s life for the other. As we have said in last Sunday’s homily, it is when we cry “it is enough, Lord” when God gives us more than enough to sustain us sometimes in the form of a good movie like this one. May we have more “bread” like Lolo and the Kid that feeds our soul and gladdens our heart.

*BTW, we are not paid to endorse this movie; simply sharing with you its good news.

Written in our hearts

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday, Memorial of St. Dominic, Priest, 08 August 2024
Jeremiah 31:31-34 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Matthew 16:13-23
Photo by Javon Swaby on Pexels.com
Graffiti: a writing or drawings on a wall
or other surface, usually without permission
and within public view.

Writings on the wall: an idiom that means
to say something will fail or something
unpleasant will happen like during the time
King Belshazzar when there appeared
writings on the wall of Babylon's impending
end (see Daniel 5:1-30).
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, 20 March 2024.

The days are coming, says the Lord, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah. But this is the covenant which I will make with the house of Israel after those days, says the Lord. I will place my law within them, and write it uppn their hearts; I will be their God, and they shall be my people (Jeremiah 31:31, 33).

How lovely,
O God our Father,
You chose to write your covenant
on our hearts-
not on the walls
nor documents
that often spell danger
and disaster
or doom and endings;
how lovely
to simply just look
inside our hearts to find
You and your covenant,
O God;
no need to look out
or look up
or look down
and see dirt
and chaos.
Your writing
on our hearts is simple,
noble and reassuring:
You shall be our God,
we are your people;
when Jesus came,
He gave us His heart
to visibly make
that writing,
that covenant
simply the word LOVE.
Many times,
we cannot find
your laws,
your writing on our hearts
because we have covered
them with so many other gods;
very often,
Jesus comes to us
asking us the same question
to the Twelve,
"But who do you say
that I am?"
but we are so busy
with our many pursuits in life,
reading the many writings
on the wall and pavements
of our sick world.

Cleanse our hearts, Lord
to truly give You our
sincere answers
and remember your
covenant of love
written on our hearts.
Amen.
St. Dominic De Guzman,
Pray for us!

To love is to be small to be a part of the other person

A wedding homily for Sir Vicente R. Santos III & Ms. Jillian Bianca Carpio
St. Michael the Archangel Parish, Bonifacio Global City, Taguig, 12 July 2024
Tobit 8:4b-8 >><}}}}*> + <*{{{{><< John 15:9-12
Photo by author in La Trinidad, Benguet, 12 July 2023.

Congratulations, Sir Teng and Mam Jill on your wedding day. Your decision to get married in the Church is an expression of love itself because love is a decision, not just a feeling. Making a decision to get married is a choice to be small, to be broken into pieces to be united, to be one with the other person, your beloved.

Every time we make that decision to love, we renounce our very selves, our selfishness. The truest sign that we love is when we are able to love somebody more than our self; and to grow in love is to always choose the other person by a daily renunciation of one’s self which Ben&Ben sang so well, “Mahiwaga… pipiliin ka sa araw-araw…”

Photo by author, Camp John Hay, 12 July 2023.

This we saw in our first reading in the beautiful prayer by Tobiah with Sarah on their honeymoon when he mentioned God’s original plan in Genesis in creating woman as a suitable partner of man.

The root word of “partner” is part. A part is always small that makes up the whole. Every whole is made up of small parts.

A part-ner means you are both a part of each other and you both have to be small in order to be whole as married couple.

In that beautiful story of Tobiah and Sarah, we find them choosing to become small in order to become part of the bigger whole, of each other, and of God.

Tobiah is the son of Tobit who lived in exile in Nineveh, the capital of Assyria that had conquered Israel in the Old Testament. Tobit used to be wealthy but had a reversal of fortunes later in life made worse with his going blind. He sent his son Tobiah to Media to collect a debt from a fellow Jew with hopes he could also find there a bride for himself among their kindred.

God then sent Archangel Raphael who disguised as a traveler to Tobiah who was so kind to welcome him as companion. On their way to Media, Tobiah was attacked by a large, strange fish while taking a bath at the Tigris River. Tobiah was able to subdue the creature while Raphael instructed him to take out its heart, liver and gall due to its medicinal properties. Tobiah obeyed Raphael and they proceeded to Media to collect the debt owed to his father. There he met and fell for a Jewish woman named Sarah.

But, there was a major problem with Sarah: she had been widowed seven times because the devil Asmodeus would always come and kill her husband just before their honeymoon!

Engraving of Raphael instructing Tobiah to gut the fish by Georg Pencz (1543) from en.wikipedia.org.

Raphael pushed Tobiah to still marry Sarah, teaching how to drive away the devil Asmodeus on their honeymoon by burning the heart and liver of the strange fish he had killed. Tobiah followed Raphael’s instructions and Asmodeus was finally driven away that is why we have this scene of them praying in thanksgiving for their marriage. (This is the reason St. Raphael is portrayed with a fish and why arbularyos burn fish intestines to drive away evil spirits.)

Tobiah returned home to present his wife Sarah to his parents in Nineveh; Raphael again instructed Tobiah to apply the dried gall of the fish onto the eyes of his father Tobit to regain his sight. Amid their celebrations for Tobit’s healing and Tobiah’s marriage, Raphael revealed himself as God’s archangel sent to them to bring their healing which is the meaning of the name Raphael, “God has healed”.

See how Tobiah and Sarah, as well as Tobit even Archangel Raphael chose to be small and humble before God and everyone, to play mere parts in the grand plan of God in their lives. They were all willing to be humble and small.

Photo by author, St. Michael Archangel Parish, BGC, Taguig City, 12 July 2024.

Sir Teng and Mam Jill, you were sent for each other by God like St. Raphael to Tobiah and Sarah and Tobit. Handle your life with prayer. Always invite Jesus into your life as a married couple just like today you when you invited Him to bless your wedding. Do not forget to celebrate Mass every Sunday, to pray daily, as much as possible together as husband and wife.

True greatness is in becoming small like a little child as Jesus Christ repeatedly told His disciples. In this world where we compete on being the biggest and most powerful, God tells us the key to fulfillment is in being small, being humble, to become a part of the whole. The greatness of every person depends on the measure of his or her ability to share because it is only in participating in the whole does one becomes truly great.

Marriage is becoming small to become one. Husband and wife cannot be one unless they let go of themselves first. Marriage is not a competition of who has more love to give and share but simply of loving and loving, giving and giving.

When you reflected Sir Teng on what to do with your life and realized you will never be complete without Mam Jill, that is being small, that is truly loving because you are willing to let go of yourself to be a part of Jill.

Remember, there’s no perfect husband nor perfect wife but you can be the ideal husband, the ideal wife by forgetting yourself through daily conversion in Jesus Christ who gave His total self out of love for us. And you do not have to die on the cross literally, Sir Teng and Mam Jill.

Photo by Irina Iriser on Pexels.com

Sir Teng, the ideal husband is someone who is deaf. Bingi. You know how women are. They talk a lot as they remember everything in detail even from long, long time ago. The moment Mam Jill starts talking, play deaf. So you don’t quarrel or debate.

Mam Jill, the idal wife is someone who is blind. Bulag. Problem with women is you see everything, kahit wala naman, may nakikita pa rin mga babae. When you see something with Sir Teng, play blind. Wala yun. Mabait siya talaga.

You two were brought together by your love for the French language. Every language is made up of small parts called letters used to form words put together in a sentence to express a thought or a feeling so we can communicate.

But, “communication is more than the expression of one’s thoughts and feelings; at its most profound level, it is the giving of self in love like Jesus Christ on the Cross” (Communio et Progressio #11)… just like every husband and wife too.

So, be small, Sir Teng and Mam Jill for you to remain in love, to grow in love, and be great in love. Amen.

Photo by author, 2018.