More blessings, more trials in Easter

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday within the Octave of Easter, 09 April 2021
Acts of the Apostles 4:1-12  <*(((><  +  ><)))*>  John 21:1-14
Photo by Mr. Jim Marpa, 2019.

I could easily identify with your words today, Lord Jesus, especially with the flow of the story of the healing of the crippled man through Peter and John: from the Upper Room to the Beautiful Gate to Solomon’s Portico to their being thrown to prison; from the proclamation of the Good News of salvation to the healing of the crippled man and now their persecution and harassment.

After the crippled man had been cured, 
while Peter and John were still speaking to the people, 
the priests, the captain of the temple guard, 
and the Sadducees confronted them, 
disturbed that they were teaching the people 
and proclaiming in Jesus the resurrection of the dead.  
They laid hands on Peter and John 
and put them in custody until the next day, 
since it was already evening.  
(Acts 4:1-3)

So many times, Lord, we resent and avoid sufferings in life like persecution without realizing that it is through these trials that we make it to Easter like you when you passed over from your Passion and Death to Resurrection.

There are also times, Lord, when we feel so down, feeling lost and disappointed that we try going back to our old ways like Peter and his companions that Sunday morning when they decided to go fishing again after you have risen.

Like them, we feel we can be on our own that when failures come, we fail to recognize you only to realize later that without you, we can do nothing.

When it was already dawn, 
Jesus was standing on the shore; 
but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.  
Jesus said to them, 
"Children, have you caught anything to eat?"  
They answered him, "No."  
So he said to them, "Cast the net 
over the right side of the boat and you will find something."  
So they cast it, and were not able to pull it in 
because of the number of fish.  
So the disciple whom Jesus loved 
said to Peter, "It is the Lord."  
(John 21:4-7)

Thank very much, dear Jesus for bearing with us when we feel afraid of your mission, when we doubt if it is really you who is with us, directing us, guiding us.

Send us your Holy Spirit to enlighten our minds and our hearts to be firm in our faith in you, to trust you that when trials come our way, your abundant blessings are also there pouring into us to weather every storm in life. Amen.

Photo by Mr. Raffy Tima of GMA7 News, Batanes, 2018.

Easter is turning towards God

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday within the Easter Octave, 08 April 2021
Acts 3:11-26   ><)))*> + <*(((><   Luke 24:35-48
From Facebook, 04 April 2021: “There is an urgency to announce the Joy, the joy of the Risen Lord.”
So they set out at once and returned to Jerusalem... 
The disciples of Jesus recounted 
what had taken place along the way, 
and how they had come to recognize him in the breaking of bread.  
While they were still speaking about this, 
he stood in their midst and said to them, 
"Peace be with you."  
Then he opened their minds to understand the Scriptures.  
And he said to them, 
"Thus it is written that the Christ would suffer 
and rise from the dead on the third day 
and that repentance, for the forgiveness of sins, 
would be preached in his name to all the nations, 
beginning from Jerusalem.  
You are witnesses of these things."  
(Luke 24:33,35-36,45-48) 

O dearest Jesus, help us find our way back to you! Let us turn around, turn towards you, go back to you in Jerusalem to meet you with the other disciples. Help us to repent and be converted as Peter preached in the first reading so our sins may be wiped away to see and experience you (Acts 3:19).

Cast away our doubts and fears of coming to you, of experiencing you, of seeing you because all you want is for us to be free from the bondage of sins and guilt, of the past pains and hurts so we may experience Easter – which is the fulfillment and fullness of life in you, Lord Jesus.

Strengthen our faith through the words of the scriptures that attest everything written about you is true and are meant for our own good as children of the Father.

May we keep in mind that Easter is not an ending, Lord.

As your “witnesses” to your passion, death, and resurrection, remind us of this great mission to spread your gifts of peace and forgiveness to everyone as we strive to establish your Kingdom here on earth by making life more humane especially in this time of the pandemic.

Give us patience and perseverance to go through the process of daily conversion so that your Easter may continue in us and lead to our genuine reconciliation with everyone to the Father by removing our many divisions, fears and hostilities that prevent us from caring and loving each other. Amen.

Looking at Easter, seeing Easter

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday within the Octave of Easter, 07 April 2021
Acts of the Apostles 3:1-10  <*(((>< + ><)))*>   Luke 24:13-35
Photo by author, sunrise at Lake Tiberias in Galilee, the Holy Land, 2017.
When the crippled man saw Peter and John 
about to go into the temple, he asked for alms.  
But Peter looked intently at him, as did John, 
and said, "Look at us."  He paid attention to them, 
expecting to receive something from them.  
Peter said, "I have neither silver nor gold, 
but what I do have I give you:  
in the name of 
Jesus Christ the Nazorean, 
rise and walk."  
Then Peter took him by the right hand 
and raised him up, and immediately 
his feet and ankles grew strong.  
(Acts 3:3-7)

Praise and glory to you, our Risen Lord Jesus Christ, in sharing with us your victory and glory over sin and death, sickness and powerlessness. In joining us in our humanity in all of its aspects except sin, you have made us share in your divinity at Easter.

Like Peter and John at the Beautiful Gate that afternoon, fill us with your presence and power, love and mercy to uplift and empower our brothers and sisters afflicted with sickness and other burdens that drag them down, unable to rise again to experience life anew.

Give us the courage to tell people to look at us and find you like that crippled man you have healed through Peter and John.

Moreover, let us look at your face, look for what will unite us than divide us, look at your light than at the world’s darkness and shadows so we may look for Easter especially in this time of the COVID-19 pandemic.

Remove the pessimism and cynicism growing among us in this worsening pandemic.

Ignite the flames of faith, hope and love within us so our eyes may be opened to see you again walking with us in this journey.

Cleanse us of our biases and prejudices, as well as of our expectations and other personal beliefs so we may see you most especially when we are treading the wrong path to our Emmaus of sunset and defeat.

That very day, the first day of the week, 
two of Jesus' disciples were going to a village 
seven miles from Jerusalem called Emmaus, 
and they were conversing about all the things that had occurred.  
And it happened that while they were conversing and debating, 
Jesus himself drew near and walked with them 
but their eyes were prevented from recognizing him.  
(Luke 24:13-16)

O dear Jesus, may we look at Easter on the face of everyone you send us and at every situation we find ourselves into so we may lead and guide others to you.

May we see and recognize you most of all in the darkness enveloping us this time of crisis so that eventually, we may come together in the breaking of bread and sharing of our very selves to others blinded by the calamities that have fallen upon us. Amen.

“Road to Emmaus I” painting by Daniel Bonnel, 2011 from mwerickson.com.

Questions of Easter

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Tuesday within the Octave of Easter, 06 April 2021
Acts 2:36-41  ><)))*>  +++  <*(((><  John 20:11-18   
Painting by Giotto of the Risen Lord Jesus Christ appearing to St. Mary Magdalene from commons.wikimedia.org.

Recent events of sufferings due to a surge in COVID-19 infections and the difficulties this lockdown had put on our people have somehow “cut us to the heart” like the listeners of Peter in Jerusalem after the Pentecost, God our loving Father.

Yes, we feel being cut to the heart, so moved by your presence in Christ despite this crisis in the pandemic.

Help us, Lord, answer the two questions posed by your words this Tuesday within the Easter Octave that can help us experience you more amid this unholy events happening in our history.

"What are we to do, my brothers?" 
(Acts 2:37)

First of all, Lord, we pray for our government officials who are until now clueless on what really to do during this pandemic. We pray for their conversion, to get down from their ivory towers and admit their mistakes rather than cover up with so many lies and inanities.

Give us the courage to examine too what we are really doing to overcome this crisis. So many times, we have been hiding and running away from our responsibilities in our home, in the school, in the office and even in the church! Let us confront our many fears to start trusting you and take the big leap forward learning and working on how to help others.

Teach us to be grateful for the many blessings you have given us even in this time of crisis and therefore find purpose in our lives to share the good news of Easter with others especially the less fortunate.

 "Woman, why are you weeping?"
(John 20:13, 15)

Secondly, Lord, let us live in the present moment so we may recognize and find you amid all the darkness that surround us these days. Twice your friend Mary Magdalene was asked with the same question, first by the angels and then by you, dear Jesus: “Woman, why are you weeping?”

Why did she not recognize you, Lord, considering you are the best of friends?

Sometimes, Lord, we are not like her your friend: we do not live in the present moment, always in the past that is why we cannot find you. We cannot find nor recognize you because we are stuck in your old ways and looks, in our old ways of relating with you, forgetting you have passed over from the past into the new present.

If we shall be able to live in the present moment, we shall stop weeping and start rejoicing finding you amid all the darkness and uncertainties of this pandemic. Give us the grace, dear Jesus to level up in our relating with you and with others by first meeting you in your words, in prayer, and in the Eucharist. Amen.

Photo by Bro. Cristian Pasion, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima in Valenzuela, 03 April 2021.

Telling the Easter story

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday within the Octave of Easter, 05 April 2021
Acts 2:14-, 22-33   ><)))*> + <*(((><   Matthew 28:8-15

Praise and glory to you, O God our Father for this great gift of Easter, of your Son Jesus Christ’s rising from the dead. In this time of lockdown following the deadly surge in COVID infections, it has become so difficult for many of us to celebrate Easter with deaths and sickness surrounding us, literally coming to our homes.

Send us your Holy Spirit to fill us with fire of courage and wisdom like with St. Peter in proclaiming the good news of salvation in Jesus Christ who has risen from the dead. Make us see the many interconnections in our lives of your words, of history, of everything that make us experience your reality and your goodness in Christ’s coming.

May we be immersed in your words so we may not only see its ties with our own lives but also with everybody else. May we have the sight to penetrate deeply to read the signs of the time in this pandemic so we may look at everything in your light.

In this time of emergency when so many lives are a stake not only of those getting sick but equally important of those battling the pandemic head on like our medical front liners, we pray for our government officials who until now remain detached from the crisis and most especially with the people they must serve. They are like the chief priests and elders that morning twisting the story of Easter to suit their pride and ego.

Like Mary Magdalene and the other Mary who went away quickly from the empty tomb, fill us with your reverential fear and joy to announce the good news of Easter for it is when we proclaim that Jesus is risen and alive, that is when we truly meet and encounter him.

Mary Magdalene and the other Mary 
went away quickly from the tomb, 
fearful yet overjoyed, 
and ran to announce this to his disciples.  
And behold, Jesus met them on their way and greeted them.  
They approached, embraced his feet, and did him homage.  
Then Jesus said to them, 
"Do not be afraid.  
Go tell my brothers to go to Galilee, 
and there they will see me." 
(Matthew 28:8-10)

O dearest Lord, let us go back to our Galilee, to our daily life of routine, of work and study, of ordinary folks and family where we first met you. Let us cherish them again and reflect their meanings, why they happened and where were you then when they happened. Amen.

From Facebook: “There is an urgency to announce the Joy, the joy of the Risen Lord.”

“Every Breath You Take” by The Police (1983)

The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Music by Fr. Nick F. Lalog II, 04 April 2021
“The Three Marys” by Henry Ossawa Tanner, from womeninthebible.net.

Blessed happy Easter to everyone!

This is perhaps the only year when it is so difficult to greet others with “Happy Easter” due to this ongoing lockdown following the worsening surge in COVID-19 infections with hospitals now beyond capacity.

But, that is the mystery of Easter: it is an event that truly happened in our history but something more than the usual thing like in Christmas when God became a child like us. At Easter, God broke through all human limitations to enter a new realm, a vast expanse of unknown realities beyond our imaginations, beyond our most dreaded thing in this life we call “death” (https://lordmychef.com/2021/04/04/breaking-into-new-realities/).

Like Mary Magdalene and the rest of the apostles except for John the Beloved, there are times we see nothing at all and say things we hardly think or process because everything seemed to have been lost when suddenly from within we realize life bursting forth, new hope, new beginnings!

And that is Easter!

Like this great song composed by Sting with his former group The Police, Every Breath You Take from their penultimate album Synchronicity released in 1983.

Sting was surprised with the great reception by people worldwide to this song that became their most recognized piece, spending so many weeks in almost every music chart around the globe. It is a song filled with negativities, according to Sting who wrote it in 1982 while on a retreat at Jamaica in the Caribbean following his separation from Frances Tomelty when he got involved romantically with her best friend and neighbor, Trudie Styler. The affair was so controversial, even condemned by many. Complicating things was the brewing rift among them in The Police.

But, that’s how Easter is: death becoming gateway to new life!

Imagine Jesus Christ now singing this to us in the midst of the pandemic, assuring us in every breath we take, he is not only watching us but in fact, with us!

Breaking into New Realities

The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Recipe by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Easter Sunday of the Lord's Resurrection, 04 April 2021
Acts 10:34, 37-43  +  1Corinthians 5:6-8  +  John 20:1-9
Photo by author, Paschal Candles outside the Lord’s tomb in the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, Jerusalem, 2017.
Clear out the old yeast,
so that you may become a fresh batch of dough, 
inasmuch as you are an unleavened.  
For our paschal lamb, Christ, has been sacrificed.  
Therefore, let us celebrate the feast, not with old yeast, 
the yeast of malice and wickedness, 
but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.  
(1 Corinthians 5:7-8) 

A blessed, happy Easter to everyone in this most unholy time of the COVID-19 pandemic! I know, many of us are at a loss at how can we truly celebrate and experience Easter of the Lord’s Resurrection from the dead when those among us are dying or have actually died in this recent deadly surge of corona virus infections.

Unlike Christmas which we could easily identify with the signs and symbols of birth and babies plus the cool climate of December, Easter has always been a problematique especially among us Filipinos now in the heat of the dry season. Making matter worse this year is the pandemic and its ECQ.

Christmas is always delightful. We are always drawn and attracted to the idea and reality that God became a child, making so many things great for us humans.

But, unlike Easter which is so different in the sense that here, God did not enter a familiar stage and state in our human life and existence. On the contrary – which is also its biggest plus factor and enigma – God broke through all human limitations to enter a new realm, a vast expanse of unknown realities that are beyond the most dreaded thing of all which is death!

That is why Easter to much extent is difficult to celebrate because it is hard to comprehend and explain or grasp with our limited reasons and yet, at the same time, it is so real, so true as something we have experienced deep within us!

More than those egg hunts and bunnies now gone – hopefully forever – due to the pandemic, Easter 2021 calls us for a deep, inner renewal of our selves. As we have been saying since Palm Sunday, this may be the holiest Holy Week of our lives in the most unholy time in history as it gives us many opportunities to pray and reflect this great mystery of Jesus risen from the dead.

If we truly wish to find the Risen Lord in our lives in this unholiest time of the pandemic with deaths and sufferings surrounding us, we need to go inside our selves as St. Paul tells us in the second reading, to commit ourselves anew to Christ in the sacraments of Baptism and the Eucharist where we share his Body under the sign of bread.

Recall how last Thursday we were reminded how Jesus perfected and fulfilled the Jewish Passover with his very Body given to us on Good Friday. This Easter after having risen from the dead, Jesus our Bread of Life calls us to discard the old bread that is corrupted and spoiled; Christ has given us himself as our new yeast, new leaven penetrating the dough to make rise in us a fresh and wonderful bread even in the midst of this pandemic!

We have to discard the old leaven – our old selves and way of life in sin – to break new realities in Jesus and through Jesus. Easter is a passing over, a pasch when like Jesus Christ, we dare to cross and pass over life’s challenges and risks to achieve not only we are wishing for but sometimes, we have never even imagined – like the Lord’s rising from the dead!

“The Three Marys” by Henry Ossawa Tanner, from womeninthebible.net.
On the first day of the week, 
Mary of Magdala came to the tomb early in the morning, 
while it was still dark, and saw the stone removed from the tomb.  
So she ran and went to Simon Peter 
and to the other disciple whom Jesus loved, 
and told them, "They have taken the Lord from the tomb, 
and we don't know where they put him." 
(John 20:1-2)

A few days before Ash Wednesday in February, we moved into our new assignments just in time for the start of the Lenten Season or 40-day preparation for this great feast of Easter. I have been assigned as chaplain to Our Lady of Fatima University and the Fatima University and Medical Center in Valenzuela plus its five other branches at Quezon City, Antipolo City, San Fernando City, Cabanatuan City and Sta. Rosa, Laguna.

I have been conducting my ministry basically “on-line” like Masses and talks and recollections.

And lately, praying over our sick and dying patients especially this past week with the surge of COVID-19 cases.

Due to the situation at the hospital and in compliance with the health protocols, we have devised a plan where the nurse on duty would text me for those requesting prayers for the sick with details of the patient and telephone number of the guardian. I would then call the guardian to ask him/her to bring the phone near the patient’s ear so I can pray aloud, and most of all, give the much needed absolution and commendation of the dying. Each nurse station is provided with a bottle of Holy Water for the guardian to sprinkle the patient at my signal.

After that, I pray over the guardian and bless him/her.

So far, for the past month since we have been doing this, nobody had called me what have happened to their patients, if they survived or not. I have stopped following up on them because usually, when I asked the guardian how was their patient, they would always tell me “buhay pa po siya” (he/she still alive), as if I were waiting for their death.

However, there were times some of the guardians have called me back to express their gratitude, telling me how they were relieved knowing their loved ones have been prayed for by a priest.

Last Holy Thursday at the height of so many COVID cases, I prayed over two patients successively.

That was very amazing and inspiring for me. They were “little moments of Easter” as people experienced deaths so close to home these days, even in the most surreal way, still believing, still hoping. We too have felt it one way or the other with requests for help and prayers by relatives and friends with patients sick with COVID and with other ailments lately when we felt so helpless, with nothing else to do and contribute except pray and worry.

That is the grace of Easter so abounding in this pandemic. Let us hope that with ongoing inner renewal among us of hoping against hope that love after all conquers death. Always and certainly as we have seen lately.

Like Mary, there are times we see nothing at all and say things we hardly think or process.

We feel at a loss, almost about to give up yet a tiny sparkle of faith and hope keeps us running to others for help whom we think could do something, maybe used by God to change or remedy our “lost” cause or situation.

That is where the grace of Easter is found every day: something very true and real within us keeps us believing in life and meaning, in God through Jesus Christ when all is gone and even lost.

Why still go to the tomb at all like Mary? If Jesus were already dead, what is the use of going to anoint him with oil and perfumes? Was Mary feeling something even so little, so tiny like hope against hope that Jesus could still be alive?

It was beyond her that she was terrified and ran to Peter upon seeing the empty tomb! She had felt that what was deep inside her was true after all, that there is a greater life beyond this that exists – exactly like what we believed – that there is Resurrection of the dead in Jesus Christ because he himself we can feel deep inside us!

Like Peter on that Pentecost Sunday, we may not go on a discourse explaining what had happened because we have not witnessed the Resurrection like him but we speak out, we believe because we experienced life bursting forth amidst deaths and losses. Like Peter, we have witnessed so many other things, little moments of Easter that showed us signs of God’s abiding presence and love.

Like the light of the new day piercing through the darkness, there is the Risen Jesus touching us, assuring us, loving us and telling us that Easter is not an ending in itself for it continues now and shall continue until the end when Christ comes again to definitively put an end to death when we live eternally with him in the Father in heaven. Amen.

Blessed happy easter!

Photo by author, Mirador Center of Spirituality, Baguio City, January 2019.

Advent, a prelude to Easter

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday, Advent Week-II, 07 December 2020
Isaiah 35:1-10     >><)))*>  >><)))*>  >><)))*>     Luke 5:17-26
Photo by author, sacristy altar, 05 December 2020.

Your words today, O God are so uplifting, evoking in us springtime when everything is bursting into new life making this Season of Advent a prelude to Easter. And rightly so!

The desert and the parched land will exult; the steppe will rejoice and bloom. They will bloom with abundant flowers, and rejoice with joyful song. Then will the eyes of the blind be opened, ears of the deaf be cleared; then will the lame leap like a stag, the tongue of the dumb will sing. Streams will burst forth in the desert, and rivers in the steppe. The burning sands will become pools, and the thirsty ground, springs of water.

Isaiah 35:1-2, 5-7

But for us to see life bursting forth around us, let us in our selves first desire life, persevere our healing, and keep your gifts of mercy and forgiveness like the men who lowered through the roof a paralyzed man on a stretcher before Jesus while preaching inside a packed house.

Strengthen us to go out and find ways in meeting you, Jesus, like those men.

Forgive us for the many occasions of cynicisms and indifference, as well as arrogance and pride like the scribes and Pharisees who questioned your authority to forgive sins.

As we have reflected yesterday, Advent is a two-way street: you always come, Lord Jesus but we must also come to meet you. So many times you have come to our lives but we never met you, never experienced you nor even felt you because we have always been full of ourselves, of our sins, and of so many other people and things.

Keep us one with you always, Jesus – in your cross, in your humility, in your love.

Like St. Ambrose your great Bishop of Milan, may we lead more souls discover you, Jesus, and experience life anew like St. Augustine, his famous convert. Amen.

Good Fridays on Sundays

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 11 October 2020
Photo by Ms. Anne Ramos, Good Friday “motororized procession” of Santo
Entierro in our Parish during COVID-19, 10 April 2020.
Lately I have noticed
since month of August
when we have a spike of the virus
I have felt heavy and serious
as Sundays have become 
more like a Good Friday
with the streets and church seats
both empty;  nobody seems to be happy
or Sundays have become more lazy?
How I miss the people I always see
wondering if they are safe and healthy
or maybe so wary just like me.
Sometimes I still feel
how everything is surreal
will I make it to next year
enjoying life without fear?
I have been wondering
if the Lord is still hanging
or have they crucified him again?
Life in the midst of COVID-19
has become more challenging
listening to silence so deafening
when God does not seem to be caring;
but, deep within
there is that calming
during Good Friday
that Easter Sunday
 is surely coming:
keep on believing, keep on praying
if Sundays look like a Good Friday
this may only mean one thing, that
Jesus is with us suffering COVID-19!

The gift of tears

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 22 September 2020
Photo by Ms. Ria De Vera of our parish church, August 2020.

Lately I have been watching old movies that I wonder why I still cry even if I have seen them more than twice before at the cinema and cable TV. It seems that my being born with “mababa ang luha” (easy to cry) is getting more “mababa” as I get old.

Tears are a gift from God, the most beautiful prayer we can ever express courtesy of the Holy Spirit because when we run out of words for our pains and sadness or when we are overjoyed, he makes us cry to heal and comfort us or complete our joys, assuring us of his loving presence.

That is the reason why we call “home” in Tagalog as “tahanan”: home is where we “stop crying”, that is, “tahan na” because that is where we find all the support we need in times of crisis. Indeed, home is where the heart is.

True to its function, tears cleanse us physically, emotionally and spiritually. I have read two decades ago that researchers at a university in the US have found the chemical composition of our tears differ if we cry because of pain and sadness or due to joy and laughter.

Is it not wonderful and amazing how we take for granted crying and tears without realizing its chemical process within that can transform our very selves?

Photo from Reuters.com, July 2020.
Tears and crying mark our life's coming to full circle.

When I was five years old, I saw the picture of a newborn baby crying in the Book Section of the Reader’s Digest. I asked my mom why the baby was crying. In her usual motherly way of explaining things, she told me that if the baby cries upon birth, it means he/she is alive; if the baby does not cry, he/she is dead.

Kapag umiyak, buhay; walang iyak, patay.

My young mind easily absorbed her words that would remain to be one of the most profound lessons I had ever learned about life at a very young age. As I grew up watching TV and movies, I would always sigh with relief whenever I heard the sounds “uha-uha” because the story would surely be nice and not tragic.

Imagine the great inverse that happens with crying and tears to signal the coming to the outside world of life of another human, of how we have to cry to be alive from then on until we die when it becomes our family and friends’ turn to cry and shed tears for us when we are gone.

But there is something more deeper than this great inverse on crying in life and death I had learned only in 2013 through my best friend Gil, a classmate in our minor seminary.

It was late February of that year on the 40th day of the death of his youngest sister Claire when he was diagnosed with cancer. We could not believe the news because Gil was the most health conscious in our “band of brothers” from high school who never smoked, rarely ate meat, and was active in sports like golf and badminton. Unlike most of us, he was never overweight, looked so healthy in our mid-40’s.

Imagine the hurt within him that every time we would visit him, he would cry not really in pain but more on the why of getting cancer. We tried visiting him as often as we can to cheer him up and lift his spirits specially after his surgery when his chemotherapy sessions began.

By September on that same year, we all had to rush and visit him at Makati Med one Sunday afternoon when informed by his Ate Lily that doctors have given up on him. His cancer cells were “ferocious” and nothing could be done anymore except to wait for the inevitable.

That was when I noticed the greater inverse about crying when Gil had finally accepted his condition and life direction, that was when he was most joyous and peaceful too while we were the ones so sad and worried, crying. How our roles were reversed with Gil now telling us to stop crying – tahan na – which we used to tell him months earlier! (Gil died peacefully the following Sunday, 22 September 2013.)

“Mater Dolorosa” as “Blue Madonna” (1616) by Carlo Dolci. Photo from Wikimedia Commons.

I noticed it happening so many times with some friends and parishioners I have come to love in my ministry, those I have pastorally cared for some time after being diagnosed with serious conditions like cancer.

Yes, I have cried despite holding my tears for them while administering the Holy Viaticum and Anointing of Oil. The patients in turn would just glance at me, so dignified and calm like Mary our Lady of Sorrows as if trying to comfort me with their sweet thank you.

As I prayed on those experiences, I realized how life comes to full circle through our crying and tears.

I believe that patients cry when they start undergoing treatment of their sickness due to fears and uncertainty of what would happen next to them; later as they come to terms with their condition, they stop crying because they already knew where they were going, of what was coming next.

We who would be left behind cry and begin to shed tears at thoughts of their dying because admittedly, we are actually the ones more uncertain of where we are going to or how our lives would go through when our loved ones are gone.

That is the greatest pain we feel in the death of a beloved when we grapple with the realities of the many uncertainties of life without them.

And that is why we need to love as much as we can our family and friends while still alive. This quarantine period of the pandemic are grace-filled moments to shower them with our love and presence we have taken for granted for so long as we pursued many things in our lives.

Photo by Dr. Mylene A. Santos, MD at Infanta, Quezon, April 2020.
Tears and crying lead us to heaven.

Death and sickness, like life, become a blessing if we are filled with gratitude not regrets because we have truly loved. When a beloved is gone and we begin to cry, the tears wash away our pains of losing them, cleansing us within to leave us with all the beautiful memories and love we have shared. Then, every remembering becomes truly a re-membering, making a lost loved one a member of the present again.

When we cry, tears polish the love we have shared with everybody until later when our time comes, our visions are also cleared of what is going to happen next, of where we are going. Crying becomes wonderful and truly a grace after all not only in sharing and being one with the grief and pain of another in the present but sooner or later, in having a glimpse of the life after.

In the Gospel of John (11:1-44), we find the story of the raising of Lazarus whom Jesus loved so much that he wept – not just cried – at his death. Jesus raised him up back to life, his final miracle – or “seventh sign” according to John – to show he is the Christ before his own Resurrection at Easter after his “final hour” of Crucifixion on Good Friday.

From then on, Christ sanctified crying and tears to enable us to see beyond pains and hurts, even death especially if you have truly loved.

Sometimes in life, it is always good to let those tears flow, like love even if it is painful, to have a good cry and real cleansing inside. A blessed day to you!