The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday in the Fourth Week of Easter, 04 May 2023
Acts 13:13-25 ><}}}*> + ><}}}*> + ><}}}*> John13:16-20
O Lord Jesus Christ,
how lovely that you taught
us how to lovingly serve you in
others by washing the feet
of your disciples to show
that service is in the context
of a table gathering,
of a meal of family
and friends.
When Jesus had washed the disciples’ feet, he said to them: “Amen, amen, I say to you, no slave is greater than his master not any messenger greater than the one who sent him. If you understand this, blessed are you if you do it.”
John 13:16-17
Service which is
ministerium or ministry
in Latin and diakonia in
Greek both connote
"table service",
serving in one's little
way at home (oikos),
an expression of your "dwelling"
Lord Jesus in the Father
and of your "dwelling" in us,
of our "dwelling" in God in you
with others;
how lovely, indeed,
that serving is directly
related with the table found
in home or dwelling so that,
therefore, to serve means to be
at home, to dwell in God,
to dwell with others in Christ;
furthermore, service is
to be rooted
in our home,
in our family
who is God himself
ultimately as St. Paul
explained today in the
first reading!
Help us realize this,
Lord Jesus, that to serve
is not to do something so big
for others, something so
spectacular for everyone to see;
to serve is simply to be present
with our loved ones, with others
in facing life's so many challenges;
to serve, O Lord, is to continually
dwell in you,
to find and recognize you
in each other as your
indwelling, your home
who must be respected
and honored as a person,
a brother and a sister
in you; being present
with another is service
in itself.
Of what use are all
our efforts in serving
those far if we cannot
even look at those near us
in their eyes
to recognize them
as your indwelling too?
Let us be at home in you
and with you, Jesus,
so we may be at home too
with others.
Amen.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 02 May 2023
Reflections on the occasion of my 25th year in the Priesthood
With our Bishop, Most Rev. Dennis C. Villarojo, DD after our anniversary and his birthday Mass in his private chapel; from left Fr. Romy Sasi, Fr. Arnel Camacho, Fr. Leonard Hernandez, the Bishop, Fr. Ed Rodriguez, and me. Not in photo was Fr. Joshua Panganiban who was sick and another classmate who had left the ministry more than five years ago. Photo by Fr. Leonard.
I first entered the seminary as a second year high school in 1979. When we were about to graduate in 1982, I was told to leave the seminary after failing admission to San Carlos Seminary due to the unfavorable results of my psychological exam. It was a very painful experience for me. It is only now on my 25th year of priesthood that I am coming to terms with that dark episode in my life. In fact, it is only now that I can admit it unashamed.
Making it doubly hard for me was when San Carlos Seminary Prefect of Discipline Msgr. Sunga refused to tell me the findings in my psychological exam except I would find it out as I moved on in life. And I think, I have found the reason. “It is the Lord!”
My classmates from UST AB Journalism class of 1986, from left, Lito Zulueta, Dante Santiago, Ellen Jurado-Cobarrubias, front Marie Ann, Luz Lopez Urquiola, Bel De Leon, beside me, Pia Pajarillo-Bantolo, Vilma Capellan, Rose Munoz-Landicho and Ross.
From that experience, I have realized that Christ comes to us even in the darkest moments of our lives. It is often when we have nothing, when we are empty that we are abundant in Christ. It is a mystery that continues to unfold until now! Difficult to explain fully. What was a setback and a dark spot for me before, that failure in my psychological exam has become more of a blessing later to me.
From the seminary, I went to the University of Sto. Tomas to pursue my first love, journalism. Everything happened so fast from UST where I had the chance to join the staff of the Varsitarian, covering the sports beat.
For my internship program, I trained at GMA-7 News to explore broadcast news. Immediately, I was amazed with the speed and timeliness of broadcast news with the constant clacking and ringing or sometimes whining of the UPI and PNA telex machines either from breaking news or when they ran out of newsprint reels. Luckily after graduation in 1986, I was hired by Ms. Tina Monzon-Palma as radio news writer for DZBB-AM and DWLS-FM.
With my co-staffers at the Varsitarian of UST, from left, Alane Ty, Jenny Bartolome, Sr. Gina Kuizon, Mother superior of RGS who was the assistant of Ms. Jesselyn G. Dela Cruz our Asst. Publications Director, Lito Zulueta of Inquirer, at the back are Romy the husband of Mam Jess and Jun Carnecer.
From a news writer in 1986, I became a reporter in 1988 covering the police beat on the night shift until 1990 when Ms. Jessica Soho recommended me to replace her in the the military/defense she used to cover after she was promoted to having a regular morning show, “Kape at Balita”.
I refused the position because I was so afraid of failing to measure up to Jessica’s stature but most of all, I felt not qualified of not having the voice for broadcast news. Yes, I have never wanted to be an “on-cam” reporter because I do not have the broadcast voice. Got no problem with that. That is why my application at GMA-7 was for a news writer. Again, it was the Lord I moved to become a police reporter at that time.
It is funny how I have always refused tasks that put me at the forefront since my GMA-7 days as a result of that “psych exam” in high school. Since college, I have found myself working best behind the scenes and behind the camera, working in hiddenness.
And yes, most of all, for lack of self-confidence. That is why I could not also believe when I felt God calling me to the priesthood again! And when I have become a priest, I have always wanted to be sent into the far-flung areas unnoticed but God would always bring me to major assignments like first, our diocesan school beside the Malolos Cathedral and now as chaplain of Our Lady of Fatima University with six campuses and two Medical Centers!
Me in our old newsroom filing my report after the graveyard shift 1989; photo by Mr. Jack Taylaran.
Going back to my vocation story… Every time I moved up in GMA-7 News, I would feel a reawakening or a resurging of my vocation. In the midst of the perks of the job plus the “celebrity” status, that was when I felt empty and unfulfilled! Something was missing in my life at the beginning I could not figure out. Tried to find fulfillment in everything including relationships but, I still felt empty. In fact, my vocation to the priesthood “pestered” me most when I was into relationships, feeling so praning with a voice within asking me “paano pagpapari mo?” As a result, I tried going back to prayers, then to Sunday Masses that slowly gave me some sense of fulfillment and peace within.
But after covering the December coup attempt of 1989 I felt something so strange deep within me: the more I felt empty within. Despite the adrenalin rush of covering the bloodiest coup attempt in our history, the thoughts of the priesthood would always cross my mind even without my thinking. It happened again the following year during coverage of the July 1990 earthquake. I was not feeling contented with my life. All I felt was a deeper longing for God and spiritual things like serving the people not just as a reporter. I felt God calling me to something more than covering the news but proclaiming the good news of Christ.
On my first day off after the July 1990 earthquake, I went to see my former minor seminary rector, Fr. Memeng Salonga for spiritual direction. He told me what I was feeling could be a vocation to the priesthood. My plan at that time was to wait for about five years before deciding for the priesthood. What if I were wrong again like what happened when I applied to San Carlos Seminary? Most of all, I had no more plans of becoming a priest. And I thought of running away from God like the Prophet Jonah, without realizing I ended up exactly like him!
It happened in January 1991 when it was my turn to join then Armed Forces chief Gen. Lisandro Abadia in his inspection of troops in northern Luzon. On our last stop at Laoag airport, one of the tires of our plane exploded upon landing!
It happened at the right side of the plane where I was seated near the window. Instinctively on seeing and hearing the explosion, I ducked my head down and braced myself for impact while deep inside me, I was frantically praying in silence to God, telling him, “magpapari na po ako, magpapari na po ako!”
That is why Jonah is my favorite character in the Old Testament as I felt like him inside the belly of PAF’s Fokker plane in 1991 trying to escape God’s call to the priesthood.
My GMA-7 colleagues, from left, JJ Jimeno, Jimmy Gil, Boy Sonza, Jun Fronda, Atty. Dan de Padua, Kelly B. Vergel de Dios, Marissa Flores, Jessica Soho, and Ben Cab of PNA.
When we got back to Manila late that afternoon, everybody was congratulating me, saying I could be the next Jessica Soho as I figured out in a near-fatal accident with the Chief-of-Staff. Behind my smiles was a firm resolve inside to finally follow Jesus. Weeks after Mt. Pinatubo spewed smokes in March, I gave my letter of resignation to Ms. Palma and simply told her, I was going back to the seminary to give my vocation a second chance. Mt. Pinatubo would finally erupt on June 12, 1991 when I was already inside the seminary.
My first year in the seminary, 1991, after resigning from GMA-7 News.
Life was not easy in the seminary. Temptations to leave the seminary and go back to work were most tempting during my first three years as I knew already where to go, what to do in life. Maybe about three times I have tried leaving the seminary while I was constantly warned of being sent out too!
The Portuguese have a saying that “God writes straight crooked lines.” True. Nine years after leaving the seminary in high school, I went back to the seminary in 1991 eventually being ordained in 1998. Now 25 years as a priest, I thank God for this most precious gift of priesthood. It is very difficult but most fulfilling.
As a priest and an individual, I have realized that if there are 8-billion people in the world, there are also 8-billion kinds of love God has specifically for each one of us. God loves us in the most personal manner. It is the greatest mystery in life we would never be able to solve because it is insolvable. We just have to live on it, be wrapped in his mystery that once in a while, like the beloved disciple amid the darkness of dawn, we would have glimpses of him, making us shout “It is the Lord!” Thank my dear friends for showing me always the Lord. Hope and pray you too have seen the Lord in me! God bless!
The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday, Feast of St. Joseph the Worker, 01 May 2023
Genesis 1:26-2:3 ><]]]]'> + <'[[[[>< Matthew 13:54-58
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 20 March 2023.
Glory and praise to you,
God our loving Father
in giving us a share
in your work in making
this world a better place;
despite our sinfulness and
turning away from you
in the time of Adam and Eve,
you still call us to participate
in your work of holiness
by calling St. Joseph to
marry the Blessed Virgin
Mary, the Mother of your Son
and our Lord Jesus Christ.
Despite the difficult situation
and work ahead of him,
St. Joseph obeyed you,
working in silence,
doing your will,
taking care of Jesus and Mary
that in his work,
people recognized
Jesus!
Jesus came to his native place and taught the people in their synagogue. They were astonished and said, “Where did this man get such wisdom and mighty deeds? Is he not the carpenter’s son?”
Matthew 13:54-55
Like St. Joseph,
may we not find only
the labor and amount
of work to be done
in our tasks and jobs
but most of all,
that we may find
you in Jesus Christ,
the very meaning of
our life and work.
Amen.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 21 April 2023
Reflections on the occasion of my 25th year in the Priesthood
Photo by Mr. Jong Arcano before the Mass with Ms. Marissa Flores (former SVP-GMA7 News), the Ms. Tina Monzon-Palma, of course, Ms. Jessica Soho, Ms. Jaileen Jimeno of GMA News with Mr. Ben Cal of Phil. News Agency at the back.
As I have promised you yesterday, today we reflect about the women the Lord had sent me to meet him, to follow him.
My first assignment from 1998 to 2010 after ordination was teacher-administrator of the Immaculate Conception School for Boys (ICSB) and Immaculate Conception School of Malolos (ICSM). My students would always ask me why I left the news to become a priest. My usual answer given in a jest, especially to the boys, was that I wanted to “love” more women than just one. It was a “birong totoo” because that was how I felt when I began examining my life and heard anew my vocation following that conversation with Atty. Dan.
During my retreat last March while praying over the many graces and blessings I have not been aware of, I realized how God prepared me for the priesthood and its call of celibacy. As I looked back in my life, he has blessed me with great women, so beautiful inside and outside. They were gifts that even if I did not get married because I chose priesthood and celibacy, I feel so blessed with that unique relationships with these wonderful women who continue to enrich my life as a person, as a priest.
First, my Bosses in work have all been women.
Photo by Ms. Karen Galarpe as shared during our 2017 Homecoming at the Varsitarian; Ms. Gina has long been away and I could not find our old photos. Nonetheless, in this photo are Sr. Gina who proclaimed the first reading at my anniversary who was then assistant of our Asst. Publications Director Ms. Jesselyn dela Cruz to her right.
My first boss was Ms. Gina Bautista-Navarette. She was the editor-in-chief of the UST’s Varsitarian when I applied as a news reporter in 1984. Even at that time, she has always been the epitome of “beauty and brains” – so lovely and so kind, but really tough inside, especially with her knowledge and beliefs. She finished Industrial Engineering and went to work first at PRC as one of its young executives, then to Johnson & Johnson and then to Jollibee as VP for Marketing. When Jollibee bought Greenwich Pizza, she became its GM and a few years later, became the President of Red Ribbon when Jollibee acquired the famous cake company. While still the VP for Marketing at Jollibee, I invited her to our school for a career talk to our students. She in turn would call me sometimes for comments for their products which I enjoyed because I had valid reasons to eat burgers and palabok!
Later on, Gina emailed me of their moving to Canada for a “lifestyle shift” but even then, she had never forgotten to greet me during my ordination anniversaries as deacon and priest! That is why, whenever I remember and pray for Gina, “it is the Lord” whom I see.
She came about two hours early last Tuesday because she said, “gusto ko lang makausap ka muna Father ng konti.”
My second boss was Ms. Tina Monzon-Palma. Yes. The Ms. Tina Monzon-Palma of television news. Late have I realized the super blessing given to me by God to have worked under Ms. TMP as we called her.
So tall and lovely, surely better than that girl from Ipanema! But, in her I found really a WOMAN in the truest sense. Astig. But with a lot of sense of humor. So kalog. And yes, so kind and thoughtful. What I could not forget is her sense of humility. Imagine, the goddess of TV News for so long that you would surely believe if she tells you World War III has begun, is in fact a humble person because she says sorry. I have personally experienced her saying sorry once or twice but on other occasions, she has that tender way of letting you know she is sorry like saying “kumusta na kid?” or just being extra nice on certain days. Whenever I feel in a dilemma of saying sorry or not, when I feel so proud, I remember Ms. Tina who despite her stature and every right and privilege would always be that humble to say sorry.
Another thing I learned from Ms. TMP was when she told me why she would always reprimand me with my scripts and reports: she insisted She would insisted excellence in our work. Later in the seminary and as a priest, I would speak of excellence as holiness, of giving your best always. It is the very heart of St. Therese’s “little way”, of doing small things excellently.
I will always be proud of Ms. Tina. Monzon-Palma. Even she had moved to other networks, she remained our kapuso, seeing us, conversing with us her former colleagues at GMA-7. She came to my 50th birthday and again in my anniversary. In fact, she came so early because she told me, she just wanted to talk to me. Truly, I could say that afternoon, “It is the Lord” when I was with her.
Our President, Dra. Caroline Enriquez in red, to her right is Mr. Rico Santos, VP for Finance of FUMC and wife Dra. Carol; at the middle is my predecessor Fr. Lito Caliwag, Dra. Mylene A. Santos, MD our VP for Student Affairs, standing next to her is Dr. Vic Santos, President of FUMC with his son Angelo and wife, Dra. Mary Anne.
My third and current Boss is again a woman, also beauty and brains, but most holy and truly a Wonder Woman. The President of the Our Lady of Fatima University (OLFU) and Board Member of Fatima University Medical Center (FUMC) of which I am both the chaplain: Dr. Caroline Santos-Enriquez, MD.
I first met Dra. Caroline in 2010-2011 when I was first assigned as attached priest here at the National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima in Valenzuela. Twice the chaplain was indisposed and I had to celebrate Masses for him. After I was given a parish of my own to shepherd, Doctora would always invite me for talks in OLFU and twice to address their graduates at the PICC.
During my retreat last month, she came to my prayers. Yes, “It is the Lord” experience again and I felt so ashamed before God not realizing this immense grace and blessing of how a great woman of faith who has hurdled so many trials in life, a very wise manager and steward who has steered OLFU to what it is today with six campuses would believe in me? Our Bishop told me during our clergy reshuffle in December 2020 that he had asked Dra. Enriquez to recommend to him three names he would assign as chaplain. I was her first choice, and again, “It is the Lord!”
Of the other women and friends God gave me to lead me back to his Son Jesus, will share them Monday in our next blog. For now, I too believe that nothing happens by accident. God knew everything beforehand that I would be sent out of the seminary in 1982 only to go back after nine years and become a priest 25 years ago. In all those years, he blessed me with so many friends, especially friends who are girls, some are ladies, and many are women like my three Bosses in the professional life. They are among the best of his blessings I was not aware until I went back to those 25 years of my priesthood. It is the Lord I have seen in them. And like James Taylor in his 1971 song Places in My Past, I could sing…
There are ladies in my life
Lovely ladies in these lazy days
And though I never took a wife
May I say that I have loved me one or two
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 20 April 2023
Reflections on the occasion of my 25th year ordination to the Priesthood
Photo by Arch. Philip Santiago; to my left is our former Rector in Minor Seminary, Fr. Domingo Salonga and our Prefect of Discipline, Msgr. Albert Suatengco.
It is the Lord! And it has always been him. Will always be him. Thank you very much my dearest family and friends including you my readers of this blog for showing me the Lord, for leading me to the Lord all these years especially on the occasion of my 25th anniversary in the priesthood.
Been praying for this occasion since March when I went on a personal retreat when I turned 58 years old. One of the reflections assigned to me by my Spiritual Director, Jesuit Fr. Danny Gozar was to pray for all the grace and blessings God has given me that I am not aware of. One of the many blessings I “rediscovered” God has blessed me all these years were the people he had gifted me, from my family and relatives, classmates from elementary to college and the seminary, colleagues in work as well as students, and lately, some parishioners who have all become my friends.
It is the Lord whom I have seen in them. And I became a priest because of them. Maybe if I did not meet them, my life would have been different.
Jesus revealed himself again to his disciples at the Sea of Tiberias. He revealed himself in this way. Together were Simon Peter, Thomas called Didymus, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, Zebedee’s sons, and two others of his disciples.
John 21:1-2
Photo by Ms. Tita Valderama, my friends from GMA News, from left: JJ Jimeno, Jimmy Gil, Boy Sonza, Jun Fronda, Marissa Flores (former SVP of GMA News), Jessica Soho and Ben Cal of PNA; beside me is Atty. Dan de Padua, and Kelly B. Vergel de Dios.
Some of them are very prominent, from the who’s who of the country like those persons named in the gospel, Simon Peter, Thomas called Didymus, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee. It is a tremendous blessing from God I have come to know so many prominent people, big shots indeed in Philippine media and society who taught me so much about journalism and most especially about life. In them I experienced there are so many goodness in every person, even those we look up to. They are so human with the same joys and pains, dreams and aspirations like us ordinary people. They get tired and get sick, they love to eat and drink, watch movies and enjoy music. Most of all, they have high moral sense and deep faith in God.
One of them I have to mention is the one who really paved the way for me to reconsider my vocation, Atty. Dan de Padua who was then assigned to GMA-7 News Department when I was already a police reporter covering the night shift. He would join us in our coverage and sometimes, before our shift, we would have some drinks at Jazz Rhythms along Timog Avenue. We got to know his background and former work with a multinational corporation with mega buck deals. I asked him why did he leave that better paying job? His answer struck me. Like the beloved disciple in the gospel, all I could say was “It is the Lord”.
According to Sir Dan, “nahiya naman ako sa sarili ko na matapos mag-aral sa UP, nagtatrabaho ako para sa mga foreigners… umalis ako sa kanila para ibalik sa bayan binigay sa akin.” Wow! Yes, there are good and holy lawyers, especially from UP! And my former boss is one of them! His words never left me, giving me many occasions of introspection when alone, as a graduate of Catholic schools from elementary to college, do I have the same love for the Church, for God?
Napahiya ako sa sarili ko. Here is a man, a big shot lawyer, thinking about our country we love to make fun of even curse and there I was, thinking only of myself? Of course, there were still other realizations I had but that really started my journey back to Jesus and to the seminary until my ordination on April 18, 1998.
There were so many other people I met when I was still outside the seminary who have enriched me as a person with their friendships and professionalism.
Photo by Mr. Jong Arcano with his wife.
I am forever grateful to my former editor at UST’s The Varsitarian, Mr. Jong Arcano who trained me so well in writing, especially looking into the human aspects of the persons being covered. Along with Mr. Jimmy Gil of GMA News, they taught me the importance of looking into the “human-ness” of the people in the news. Mr. Gil also told me while discussing the dangers of coverages that the most important story in the world is “your life that is why as a journalist, think also of your safety because if you die, who would tell the story you have covered?” Later on as a priest, I realized it so true! As a priest, there is that certain distance we must keep with the people but always that closeness to get their story. Fr. Henri Nouwen wrote in one of his books, “what is most personal is most universal.”
Worth mentioning also is our former SVP for Operations in GMA but a newsman through and through, Mr. Tony Seva. He summoned me to his office one afternoon to bring clippings of the write ups of an actress of our soap drama who had died. At his office, he asked me to take down some notes but somebody had earlier borrowed my pen in the newsroom! He told me I could leave my dick at home but never walk without a pen! That is why I always have pen in my pocket long after I have left the news! Like our Latin teacher in the seminary, Mr. Seva taught me to never open my mouth unless I am sure of what I am saying. That’s precision.
There are so many other men and women with names and without names who have taught me so well and most of all, I am sure without them knowing, have led me to see Jesus to become a priest. I used to tell my students that friends are gifts from God; therefore, true friends lead us back to God too!
Did I say women? Of course! I must confess, it took me so long to decide to leave the news and enter the seminary to become a priest because of women. I was so afraid, until now, I might not be faithful to Jesus because, yun nga! Madali ako ma-attract at ma-in-love!
Will tell you my “love story” in my next blog, of how women have led me to Jesus. Maybe, I should write a song similar to Yvonne Elliman’s song in Jesus Christ Superstar to be called “I Don’t Know How to Love Her”.
Thank you for your prayers on my 25th year in the priesthood. God bless you all!
Photo by Mr. Jong Arcano with Ms. Tina Monzon-Palma before the Mass.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 17 April 2023
Photo by author, 08 February 2023, Taal Vista Hotel, Tagaytay City.
We all know
that feeling happening
more often lately
a foreboding of senility?
when we go like crazy
why can't we see suddenly
some things we have
held or kept momentarily
until we sound the alarm
and call everyone
to join in the search
but still nowhere to be found.
It could be the key
or the glasses or the phone
that in exasperation
we say begone
only to make us
forlorn figures
in our own home
or tiny room
but sometimes too soon
other times would take
too long, our lost
things are suddenly found!
Is it part of the riddle of that black hole they call when missing things suddenly appear without being sought much less thought? But here is the thrill: when things even persons are missing, are we not the ones who are lost and waiting to be found?
More than the
naked shouts of eureka
is our profound joy
when missing things
even persons suddenly
appear because the truth
is, we were the ones lost
and could not be found
in our cluttered minds
and hearts shut and closed
by our fears and doubts,
anxieties and insecurities.
In this life
far wider than the world
where planes still go missing
amid modern technologies
and endless searching,
could it be that we are
missing our bearings
as beings, forgetting
God and others when we are
lost to our own beliefs or
locked in our small world
of lies and prejudice?
To find those missing
persons or things dear to us
it might help if we first lose
whatever is holding us
for the world is so wide
for anyone or anything
to just disappear
they surely must be here
awaiting for our hearts
to be clear until we hear
that sweet voice
giving us peace within.
On the evening of that first day of the week, when the doors were locked, where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord.
The Lord Is My Chef Sunday Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Divine Mercy Sunday in the Octave of Easter, 16 April 2023
Acts 2:42-47 ><}}}*> 1 Peter 1:3-9 ><}}}*> John 20:19-31
Photo by author, 08 February 2023.
The ultimate joy of Easter is God’s Divine Mercy, of how his Son Jesus Christ became human like us in everything except sin, searching and finding us to bring us back to the Father by dying on the Cross. Now he is risen, Jesus overflows us with his Divine Mercy right here, right now.
Unlike other religions, Christianity is so unique because it is about God looking for us humans by becoming like us so that we may become like him in Jesus Christ. In Christ, we have come to know and experience God as a person, relating with us in all tenderness and love because he himself had gone through all our pains and hurts, betrayals and disappointments, even death! Read the Bible and you shall see from the Old Testament to the New Testament, we find series of stories of God searching for man, beginning with Adam and Eve who hid after eating the forbidden fruit reaching its highest point in the coming of Jesus Christ who on this second Sunday in Easter came looking again for us represented by the disciples who have gone hiding in a locked room for fears of their leaders who have threatened to arrest them following reports of the empty tomb.
On the evening of that first day of the week, when the doors were locked, where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. Thomas, called Didymus, one of the Twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples said to him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands and put my finger into the nailmarks and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” Now a week later his disciples were again inside and Thomas was with them. Jesus came, although the doors were locked, and stood in their midst and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands, and bring your hand into my side, and do not be unbelieving, but believe.” Thomas answered and said to him, “My Lord and my God!”
John 20:19-20, 24-28
“The Incredulity of St. Thomas”, painting by Caravaggio (1601-02) from commons.wikimedia.org.
“The disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord.” But we wonder, what kind of rejoicing was it? It must have been more than the rejoicing of passing the Bar or any board exam. There was something else in their rejoicing if we try to imagine being there on that Sunday evening of the third day.
What do I mean? Have you ever felt being the one actually lost when some friends or loved ones as well valuable things have gone “missing”?
That feeling of being the one actually lost because the “missing” persons and things have never left us entirely but just there waiting to be found and rediscovered like when things get hidden underneath the car seat or misplaced somewhere else and forgotten. Once “found” again, there is that deep sense of joy coupled with a sense of wonder and astonishment because the truth is, it was not us who have found the lost person or thing but they were the ones who actually found us too! Here is a case more profound than the “eureka” experience for we were the ones who were lost and finally found again.
And that’s the rejoicing of the disciples in seeing Jesus again that evening of Easter Sunday! They were the ones who were actually lost and found by Jesus!
Just like us today in many instances in life when we have been running away from God, locking ourselves inside our very selves because of fears, insecurities and false securities, pride and sinfulness, as well as doubts and incredulity, unbelief and disbelief in God and in one another. Like Thomas, many times we have been so unreasonable in our demands for proofs of God and everything, insisting that “to see is to believe” without realizing that it is when we believe that we actually see.
Recall during the ministry of Jesus in Galilee how he kept telling his disciples to search for the “lost sheep” of Israel first and later everyone who have sinned and been away from God. That was Divine Mercy in action. Consider these other concrete expressions of Divine Mercy by Jesus:
At the Last Supper, John told us that Jesus “loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end” (Jn.13:1); this he proved by washing the feet of the Twelve! He further proved his love the following Good Friday by dying on the Cross and immediately at Easter, to prove his love again, he looked for Mary Magdalene to break the news of his resurrection to his disciples.
Jesus is the one who finds us unaware of his presence like on this second Sunday after Easter when he appeared to Thomas who was so shocked and surprised that all he could tell Jesus was “my Lord and my God”! I doubt if ever had the chance to examine the Lord’s wounds at all!
Next Sunday we shall hear in the gospel how it is always Jesus who searches and finds us when we least expect him like in the opposite directions in life when he walked with the two disciples to Emmaus Easter evening, only to be recognized by them at his breaking of bread.
Last Friday we have heard in the gospel how Jesus again for the third time appeared after finding them in a fruitless night of fishing in Lake Tiberias by telling them to cast their net to the right side of the boat; their nets almost teared with the bountiful catch of fish!
“The Road to Emmaus” painting by American Daniel Bonnell from fineartamerica.com.
In life, it is always Jesus who searches and finds us. We are the ones always getting lost. Many times in life we cry, asking where is God but the fact is he never leaves us, he is always with us, coming to us everyday, especially on Sundays in the Holy Mass where Jesus leads our celebrations.
On Tuesday, I will celebrate my 25th year of ordination to the priesthood. How I got ordained was a long story of getting lost for nine years when I was sent out of the high school seminary after graduation in 1982. I went to college in UST and finished AB Journalism in 1986, working as a writer then a reporter for GMA Channel 7 News until 1991 when I gave my vocation a second chance by entering the seminary again.
All those years from 1982 to 1991, I felt lost and empty despite a promising career with good pay and all the perks that went with it and a sense of security but, deep inside me was a big hole of being incomplete. That was how I went back to God in prayers, then slowly to the Mass and Confessions, and the more I moved closer to God, the more I felt empty yet eager for him that I finally consulted some priests. After a few years of discernment, I decided to leave everything and started anew in God in the seminary in 1991.
It was not easy going back to the seminary but God had such wonderful ways of finding me, even at the nick of time, to save my vocation. My turning point happened during our Ignatian retreat of 30 days when I finally committed myself to God as I felt his love and presence so irresistible, even himself so true. In 1998 with six other classmates, we were ordained priests at the Malolos Cathedral. Again, it was not an easy 25 years with so many times I often felt lost and empty mostly by my own making when I sin. But like before, Jesus in his Divine Mercy has always been the One searching and finding me even in the opposite directions when I hid amid rejections, failures, fears, sadness and weeping.
Like the early Christians in our first reading, I have found God most present in those 25 years as a priest and as an individual in the communal celebrations of the Holy Eucharist, aka, the breaking of bread as I realized too that priestly celibacy is lived in a community not only of priests but with you the laity.
With the responsorial psalm this Sunday as our prayer, “let us give thanks to the Lord for he is good, his love is everlasting” because as Peter tells us in the second reading, God our Father “in his great mercy gave us a new birth to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead” (1 Pt. 1:3). Let us rejoice in him who finds us always when we are lost. Amen. Have a blessed week ahead. Say a prayer for me this Tuesday. Thank you.
Prayer I have composed after our 30-day retreat in 1995 that until now, I still pray because it is so personally true. That is Divine Mercy for me. And hope with you too!
Lawiswis ng Salita ni P. Nicanor F. Lalog II, Ika-13 ng Abril 2023
Larawan ng painting ni American painter Henry Osawa Tanner, “The Three Marys” (1910) mula sa biblicalarchaeology.org.
Magkakatulad
ang mga ebanghelista
sa paglalahad
ng mga kababaihang naiwan,
sinamahan si Jesus sa Krus
hanggang sa kanyang kamatayan;
tatlo sa kanila ating nakikilala
na sina Maria na Ina ni Jesus,
Maria Magdalena at
Maria asawa ni Clopas.
Subalit, sino
iyong "isa pang Maria"
na binabanggit sa ebanghelyo
ni San Mateo na kasama
ni Maria Magdalena
"nakaupo sa tapat ng
libingan" ni Jesus (Mateo 27:61)
na hindi naman niya kinilala
nakatayo rin sa paanan
ng Krus?
Kataka-taka sino nga ba
itong kasama ni Maria Magdalena
"Makaraan ang Araw ng Pamamahinga,
pagbubukang-liwayway
ng unang araw ng sanlinggo,
pumunta sa libingan ni Jesus
si Maria Magdalena
at isa pang Maria" (Mateo 28:1)
na unang pinagpakitaan
ng Panginoong muling nabuhay?
Hindi na natin malalaman
tunay niyang pangalan
maliban sa "isa pang Maria"
na hindi kasing tanyag
ni Magdalena,
ni walang nakakakilala
ni pumapansin
bagama't matitiyak natin
hindi siya mahuhuli
pagbibigay ng kanyang sarili
bilang tapat na alagad
ng ating Panginoon din!
Bawat isa sa atin
katulad ni Maria Magdalena,
dapat ipagpasalamat
kasama at kaibigan
maituturing din na
"isa pang Maria" -
tahimik at walang kibo
subalit buo ang loob
tayong sinasamahan
saanmang kadiliman
basta patungo kay Kristo
na kapwa nating sinusundan!
Larawan ng painting ni French painter James Tissot ng “The Two Marys Watch the Tomb” (1894) mula sa paintingmania.com.
The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday in the Easter Octave, 12 April 2023
Acts 3:1-10 ><}}}'> + <'{{{>< Luke 24:13-35
“The Road to Emmaus” painting by American Daniel Bonnell from fineartamerica.com.
Thank you, Lord Jesus Christ
in leading us back to you,
to Jerusalem in those
many nights of our lives
when we walked the opposite
direction of going back to Emmaus,
to our previous ways of life like
those two disciples on that
Easter afternoon.
Oh what a joy,
dearest Lord that even for a while
you walk with us going the
opposite direction,
listening to our frustrations and
disappointments when things do not
happen as we have planned and
expected; no coercions, no reprimands
except for calling us "foolish" and
"slow of the heart" to believe the
Scriptures (Lk.24:25) for that is
what we really are!
Forgive us, Jesus,
when we easily give up
to failures and shortcomings
that we leave you and your mission
entrusted to us; help us find our way
back to you, to Jerusalem!
Most especially,
keep our hearts "burning"
with love and zeal for you,
sharing you with others,
strengthening them,
raising them up like
what Peter and John did
to the crippled man at the
Beautiful Gate
as we continue to seek
you O Lord even
in darkness and emptiness,
sadness and losses,
sickness and failures.
Amen.
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 22 March 2023.
Photo by author, morning sun at Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 20 March 2023.
One with the Psalmist today,
O dear Jesus Christ,
I also proclaim that indeed
"The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord"
(Psalm 33:5)
because even in our sadness,
right in our weeping and in
our crying,
that is where and when you come!
Jesus said to Magdalene, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you looking for?” She thought it was the gardener and said to him, “Sir, if you carried him away, tell me where you laid him, and I will take him.” Jesus said to her, “Mary!” She turned and said to him in Hebrew, “Rabbouni,” which means Teacher.
John 20:15-16
Like Magdalene,
there are times we are overtaken
by our grief and sadness over our
many disappointments and failures,
losses and defeats like deaths
that we could not see
your loving presence,
your consoling comfort
O Lord Jesus Christ.
Like the listeners of Peter on that
day of Pentecost, "cut us to the heart"
(Acts 2:37), lay bare before us this
glaring truth of your Resurrection, Jesus,
of your victory over death and darkness,
over sin and sickness
that we may be more open to accept and
embrace your loving presence
with us and in us during the most
trying times of life like death of a loved one
or a sudden shift in our lives.
Amen.
Photo by author, Jesuit Cemetery, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 20 March 2023.
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