Tag: father and mother

Sino ang “special”?

Lawiswis ng Salita ni P. Nicanor F. Lalog II, Ika-30 ng Mayo 2023
Larawan kuha ng may-akda, exhibit ng Sto. Nino sa Malolos Cathedral, Enero 2022.

Kailan ko lamang napag-ukulan ng pansin – at pagninilay – itong isang bagay ukol sa mga tinagurian nating “special child”, yaong mga isinilang na mayroong iba’t-ibang kapansanan sa pangangatawan, pag-iisip at pandamdam (emotional).

Mabuti nga sa panahong ito ay “special” na ang tawag sa kanila kesa noong dating panahon namin na wala pang mga “sped” o special education. At least, hindi pa laganap lalo sa mga lalawigan. Noon basta hindi normal ika nga ang isang tao lalo na mga bata na ipinanganak na mayroong kapansanan na tinatawag na Down Syndrome, “mongoloid” ang tawag. Kaya naman ako noon sa mura kong isipan at katangahan, hindi ko mawari bakit siya kumain ng lapis o pencil na noo’y Mongol ang tatak?! Sorry po pero yun talaga naisip ko noong elementary ako lalo na nang biniro ng guro namin isang kaklase na palaging kagat-kagat ang lapis niya na magiging mongoloid siya sa ginagawa niya! Siyempre, ako man noo’y palaging kinakagat ang lapis at marahil kaya ako kung minsan ay parang special din.

Pero wala pong biro at mabalik tayo sa ating paksa, pansin ko lang sa pamilya ng mga kapatid nating mayroong mga naturang kapansanan na madalas at mabilis nila kaagad sinasabi na ang kanilang anak o kapatid ay “special”. Minsan mararamdaman mo rin kanilang lungkot marahil hindi sa ano pa man kungdi ang pag-aalala paano magiging buhay ng kanilang special child lalo na sa pagtanda nila.

Noong ako ay batang pari pa sa isang barrio na aking minimisahan ay mayroong special child na palaging nagsisimba. Masayang-masaya ang batang iyon sa pagsisimba at halos sumigaw sa pagsagot at pag-awit sa Misa. Napansin ko tumatahimik siya at masugid niyang tinitingnan ang lahat ng nangungumunyon.

Kinausap ko ang bata na siguro ay labing-limang taong gulang na noon. “Ibig mo ba na magkomunyon? Alam mo ba ko kung ano yun tinatanggap?” Sabi niya sa akin ay si Jesus daw iyong nasa Banal na Ostiya. Kaya kinausap ko kanyang magulang na di makapaniwalang pwede iyon. Inihanda ko ang special child at makaraan ang ilang linggo, siya ay binigyan namin ng “first communion”. Tuwang-tuwa ang bata at kanyang mga magulang. Hanggang ngayon siya ay masayang nagsisimba sa kanilang bisita.

Dati naman sa pinanggalingan kong parokya ay ipinahanap ko sa mga katekista ang lahat ng mga bata na sampung taong gulang pataas na hindi pa nakukumpilan. Isang teenager na special child ang kanilang natagpuan sa aming depressed area. Pinuntahan namin upang kausapain at himukin ang mga magulang ng special child na siya ay pakumpilan yamang libre naman. Nagulat ang ama na puwede daw palang kumpilan kanyang anak at noon siya ay naiyak nang ikuwento sa akin na kaya dalawa lang kanilang anak. Natakot daw siyang special muli ang ikatlong anak nila.

Larawan kuha ng may-akda, Baguio Cathedral, 2018.

Bakit nga ba tinatawag na special child mga batang isinilang na mayroong iba’t-ibang kapansanan at pangangailangan? Hindi ba kapag special dapat ay mahusay at magaling. Halos perfect, hindi ba?

Special child ang tawag sa kanila kasi sila ay espesyal sa Diyos. At higit na espesyal sa lahat ang kanilang mga magulang at kapatid na pinili ng Diyos upang ipagkatiwala sa kanila ang Kanyang mga special children. Sila lang marahil sa dami ng iba pang ama at ina at mga kapatid ang may higit na pagmamahal at malasakit upang arugain at palakihin ang special child ng Diyos.

Noong magbuntis ang kapatid ko sa kanyang ikatlong anak, siya ay nakunan. Malungkot na malungkot ang kapatid ko noon dahil hirap siya sa pagbubuntis. Ipinaliwanag sa akin ng kanyang doctora na kapag daw ang sanggol sa sinapupunan ng ina ay na-detect na magkakaroon ng kapansanan o sakit, mayroon daw mekanismo mismo yung baby na mag automatic shut off para di na siya lumaki at mabuhay pa. Kaya nakukunan ng baby.

Samakatwid, natural sa plano ng Diyos na lahat ng isisilang ay buo at walang kapansanan ngunit kung sakaling mayroong makalusot at mabuhay hanggang mailuwal ng kanyang ina bilang special child, ito ay kalooban ng Diyos. Siya ay biyaya ng Diyos. Regalo ng Diyos. Kaya sinasabi ng iba “suwerte” daw ang special child. Malaking biyaya ng Diyos ang bawat buhay, lalo na kung mayroong kapansanan dahil sila ay pinahintulutan niyang isilang at mabuhay para sa isang misyon para sa ating lahat. At ito iyon: espesyal bawat isa sa atin sa Diyos.

Noong isang linggo ay nagmisa ako sa pumanaw na kapatid na special child ng isang ka-opisina. Natapat noong araw na iyon ang ebanghelyo ay napakaganda sa wikang Inggles na ganito ang sinasabi:

Lifting up his eyes to heaven, Jesus prayed, saying: “Father, they are your gift to me. I wish that where I am they also may be with me, that they may see my glory that you gave me, because you loved me before the foundation of the world.”

John 17:24

Kay sarap namnamin mga salita ni Jesus, “Father, they are your gift to me.” Sa Tagalog ay hindi ganoon ang pagkakasalin at hindi binanggit ang kataga na regalo o gift. Ito yung tagpo ng kanyang pananalangin para sa kanyang mga alagad matapos ang kanilang Huling Hapunan bago siya dakpin noong Huwebes Santo.

Sino ba tayo para ituring ni Jesus na regalo o gift sa kanya ng Ama?

Sa kabila ng ating maraming kapintasan, kakulangan at kasalanan, iyan ang katotohanan: regalo tayo ng Diyos Ama di lamang sa isa’t-isa kungdi maging sa Anak niyang si Jesus.

Tayong lahat ay regalo ng Diyos. Napakahalaga, lalo na yaong mga mayroong kapansanan at iba’t ibang kahinaan sa pangangatawan at buhay.

Sa bawat special child ay mayroong extra-special na ina at ama at mga kapatid. Kaya kung ibig mo ring maging extra-special sa Diyos, kaibiganin, tulungan, at pahalagahan mga special children at kanilang pamilya. Amen.

Larawan kuha ni G. Jim Marpa, 2018.

Praying with St. Monica

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday, Memorial of St. Monica, Holy Woman, 27 August 2021
1 Thessalonians 4:1-8   ><]]]]*> + <*[[[[><   Matthew 25:1-13
Image from National Catholic Register (ncregister.com).
Today dear Father,
we pray for all mothers in a very
special way as we celebrate the
Memorial of St. Monica, mother
of your beloved servant St. Augustine.
We pray with St. Monica for all mothers
that they may truly be like the five wise
virgins in today's gospel who brought
extra oil for their lamps:  a lot of good works
and a lot, lot more of prayers when loved ones have
fallen away from faith in you.
We pray for mothers like St. Monica
for the grace of holiness expressed 
tremendously in the virtues of patience,
charity, and humility.
St. Monica with her son St. Augustine. From en.wikipedia.org
Like St. Monica, may mothers win
over their wayward husbands,
teaching them how to "disarm" and "tame"
their abusive and temperamental spouses,
remaining sweet and loving
yet firm even under pressures
 and sometimes duress,
in imitating Jesus Christ in humility
and patience.
Most of all, dear God, we pray
for mothers to be persevering and wise
in dealing with their problematic children
who have succumbed to the evils of the world;
You know very well, God, how so many
mothers cry and suffer in silence today
for their sons and daughters who have
fallen to atheism and modern paganism and
pseudo-spiritualities, consumerism and materialism,
promiscuity, early pregnancies, separation
and same-sex relationships;
substance abuse and alcoholism
and other Godless ways of living.
We pray for mothers who are sick,
those taking care of a sick loved one,
mothers forgotten by children left to
spend old age in foster homes;
and mothers suffering with
anxieties and depression
or themselves have lost faith in you.

God our Father,
so many mothers have already 
suffered so much; please ease
their pains and loneliness.
Through the intercession of
St. Monica, grant their prayers
and wishes before they meet you
in eternal life.  Amen.

Best Gifts of Christmas, II

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 28 December 2019

Italian artist Giorgione’s “Adoration of the Shepherds” (1510) showing an intimate scene set up against a distant landscape. The shepherds’ gently kneeling and bowing their heads down show their humility and fascination with the Infant Jesus while the long road behind them shows the long and tiring journey they have taken before reaching their destination.

We continue with our enumeration of the best gifts of Christmas which is above all the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. And because of his coming as human like us, we have come to share in his dignity and glory, thus, making us also the best gifts to share and receive every Christmas!

We await Christmas every year because we await Jesus Christ, the most beloved person of all we can know and have as friend.

We wait only for persons, not things.

Waiting is beautiful because we never wait alone. There is always another person waiting with us, waiting for us. And when we finally come and meet with the other person also awaiting us, then we become present, a gift for one another.

In our presence with each other comes the wonderful gift of intimacy.

“God became a human being so that in one person you could both have something to see and something to believe.”

St. Augustine, Sermon 126, 5
The spot where Jesus Christ is believed to have been born now covered and protected by this hole under the main altar of the Church of the Nativity of the Lord in Bethlehem. May 2019

Christmas is a story about persons called by God to bring us his Son Jesus Christ. It is a living story that continues to our own time. Here are some of the best gifts of Christmas coming from the gift of our personhood.

  1. The gift of family. Christmas happens in a family of husband and wife and children. Very much like Joseph, Mary, and Jesus. Remove one and the Nativity scene becomes incomplete. Let us be thankful for our family, let us pray for the unity of our family. When Jesus was lost at the age of 12, Joseph and Mary decided to return to Jerusalem – symbolizing God – and eventually found him there in the temple. Let us always turn to God, ask for his guidance and protection of every family, for the healing of our family, for the mending of our broken relationships. Let us pray for all broken families whose members from the husband and wife to their children are all aching deep inside for the pains of separation.
  2. The gift of women and of motherhood. When God created man, he found “it is not good for man to be alone” that is why he created the woman as man’s “suitable partner” (Gen.2:18). What a beautiful term for woman, part-ner, a part of man who is never complete by himself alone. How sad that until now, it is right inside the home where every woman first experience physical, verbal and emotional pains. Women are the best signs of fidelity and faith: Elizabeth called Mary “blessed” because she believed the words spoken to her by the angel from God will be fulfilled. Let us pray for the women in our lives especially own own mother and sisters, lola and aunties, cousins and nieces. Remember, the way we relate with women reflect to a great extent the way we relate with God. Love and bless the women!
  3. The gift of men and fatherhood. When Jesus taught us how to pray, he taught us that God is like a “Father” whom we shall call “Our Father”. There is a crisis in fatherhood and manhood these days because many men have forgotten to be truly man enough like God our Father: a giver of life and protector of life as well. Most of all, when children lose this gift of life, it is the father who restores the life lost like the merciful father of the prodigal son in Luke’s gospel chapter 15.
Aleteia, December 2019.

This Christmas break, spend time with your family, hug your mommy and your daddy tightly and feel their presence again.

Thank your family, your mom and dad.

Pray for your departed loved ones, visit the cemetery and say a prayer for them, talk to them. Most of all, listen to them and feel them again.

Our Parents and Grandparents, God’s Presence

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul
Friday, Feast of St. Joachim and St. Anne, 26 July 2019
Song of Songs 44:1, 10-15 >< }}}*><*{{{ >< Matthew 13:16-17
Photo by Jim Marpa. September 2018.

On this feast of the parents of the Blessed Virgin Mary, St. Joachim and St. Anne, we praise and thank you almighty Father for the gift of our dear parents as well as grandparents.

In your Ten Commandments, immediately after the first three laws pertaining to you, you commanded us to “honor our father and mother” to stress that “charity begins at home”, that before we can love anybody else in this world, it must first be our parents and grandparents.

Before we can love any other person, we must first love our parents and grandparents for they are the signs of your presence with us, O God. From them we receive our first religious instructions, and most of all, we experience first from them your love and mercy.

Bless us, O Lord, to respect and love them, especially when they are old.

Give us strong hands and arms always ready to reach out to them when they could no longer move well. Let us return that favor this time for us children to help them walk.

Give us more patience and understanding with a lot of kindness when our parents become forgetful and sometimes childish in their ways. Let us be loving to them in their old age and senior moments in the same way they were so fond of us when we were kids and knew nothing at all.

Give us also, O Lord, the eyes to see those white hair and wrinkles they have, including those sickness they now bear were all partly because of us when they have to suffer so much, work so hard to give us a brighter today.

Remind us always, Lord, that of your Ten Commandments, the fourth is the only one with a promise, “Honor your father and your mother and I shall bless you in your old age.”

Remind us, Lord, that even if we are older and wiser, or even if we are already parents too, we always remain children of our parents.

Likewise, we pray for those parents who refuse to take on their roles as mother or father to their children, for those who refuse to be responsible enough to be truly parents teaching their children what is true and good and right.

We pray for all parents that they may all bring you forth, Lord Jesus Christ, onto the world through their children and grandchildren. Amen.

From Google.