Uniqueness of the Cross

Lord My Chef Sunday Recipe for the Soul, 14 September 2025
Feast of the Exaltation of the Cross
Numbers 21:4-9 ><}}}}*> Philippians 2:6-11 ><}}}}*> John 3:13-17
*This is an updated version of our reflection last year; pray for our Marriage Encounter this weekend.

*Via Crucis at Fatima University Medical Center, Valenzuela City, 2025.*

This Sunday we have a unique celebration, the Feast of the Exaltation of the Cross that falls on the 14th day of September. It is so important that even if it falls on a Sunday, the more it must be celebrated as it is most central in the teachings of Jesus Christ.

It is so unique because despite its being made up of two ordinary pieces of wood, the Cross is most unique with its deeply extraordinary in meaning as sign of God’s immense love for us humans through Jesus Christ’s Passion and Death.

From being the sign of the most inhuman punishment in history, the Cross is now the very sign of how God “so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that he who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life” (Jn.3:16). It encapsulates the whole mystery of Jesus Christ, of how this all-powerful God beyond the ordinary became weak like us in everything except sin so that we too may be like Him, divine and more than ordinary. In His suffering and death on the Cross, Jesus made the lowly wood so ordinary to be so exalted to become His sign of love and mercy, power and majesty.

Hence, in the Cross is the power of God’s love to transform us to better persons.

In the Cross is God’s power to lead us closer to Him with its vertical beam and to others with its horizontal beam.

In the Cross is the power of good if we choose to embrace it with Christ Jesus as our Lord and Master.

The Cross is most unique of all signs in the world because underneath its ordinariness, that is where we see God’s glory and majesty. It was underneath the Cross of darkness and gloom on Good Friday that humanity began to see light and hope in life’s many absurdities. Most of all, it was underneath that Cross of suffering and death of Jesus Christ that we feel and experience the assurance of the Resurrection.

How?

Through our own pains and sufferings that are most uniquely ours too!

With their patience worn out by the journey, the people complained against God and Moses, “Why have you brought us up from Egypt to die in this desert, where there is no food or water? We are disgusted with this wretched food!” In punishment the Lord sent among the people saraph serpents, which bit the people so that many of them died (Numbers 21:4-6).

*Photo by author, Dominican Hills, Baguio City, January 2018.*

You must have heard that old story of a man who came to Jesus to return the cross given for him to carry; he asked Jesus to have it replaced with a lighter one. Jesus then led the man to a huge room with all kinds of crosses for him to choose which he prefers as the best one for him so that he would stop complaining.

After closely examining the specs of so many crosses, the man finally decided to pick one he deemed as perfect for him after considering its weight and other dimensions, only to find out from Jesus Himself that it was the same cross he had actually returned for exchange!

Many times in life we are like those people in the first reading, never ending in their complaints to God, even challenging Him, accusing Him of forsaking us, of being unfair when life becomes difficult and unbearable. There are times we feel being on the distaff side of life always like a flat tire, never on top. We cry foul to God especially with all our hurts and pains inflicted by others, asking Him where was He when most needed?

Photo by author in Jordan near the Israeli border where Moses put up the bronze serpent as instructed by God to heal those bitten by the snakes after they have complained of their conditions in the wilderness, May 2019.

While it is true life is indeed difficult, the cross reminds us of the fact that the pains and hurts we have are uniquely ours too, something we have to accept and most of all, own.

There are pains that are so deep and won’t go away that have in fact affected us dismally in our lives already. Instead of self-blaming and self-pity, we just have to ask for God’s grace to accept and own them like Jesus Christ. We just have to “bring it home” – that imagery of the Cross planted on the Calvary – into our very selves, in our being as something so true and real. And uniquely ours.

Stop thinking of others’ pains and hurts. We are not all the same. If ever we have similar experiences, the hues and shades even gravity and circumstances are not same because each pain and hurt, like the cross, is uniquely ours. Like every person, every cross is unique because it is also a gift, a mystery, and life. We have to “befriend” our pains and hurts, our own cross instead of resist it. It is in “befriending” our pains and hurts, our cross in life that we grow and mature, becoming more free to love and to be joyful because that is when the cross triumphs over its disgrace and shame in us and with others. That is when our pains and hurts, when our crosses begin to reveal to us the many beautiful truths of Easter awaiting us.

The Cross of Christ triumphed because Jesus carried it wholeheartedly, allowing those two pieces of wood to reveal not only to Him who knew everything beforehand its meaning but most of all to everyone of us the deeper truths the Cross signifies as St. Paul eloquently expressed in our second reading.

*The Cross of Christ atop the church of our Lady of Lourdes in France. Photo by my former student Ar. Philip Santiago during his pilgrimage, September 2018.*

One thing I realized after my mother died May last year is the fact that while there are so many pains and sufferings in this world, my own pain and suffering in losing her are most difficult to bear; hence, something I must carry because it is uniquely mine.

But, one thing so unique I noticed is that the more I see my cross following my mother’s death, the more I saw also the cross of others. The Cross of Jesus triumphed truly in me when I embraced and owned my cross, when I befriended my pains and hurts that eventually led me to recognize and see, to feel more and experience too the crosses of others.

When we become conscious of each one’s unique cross, slowly we are able to reveal to them the meaning of their personal crosses too because we become more sympathetic, more open, more silent to listen more, love more, care more and be more present with those in their own unique cross. No wonder, I find conversing more engaging with others who also grieve because we can see each other’s unique crosses!

Jesus calls us to imitate Him that by embracing and owning our cross, we too may lead others to finding the meaning of their own cross and thus experience Easter soon. Let us pray:

Give us the grace,
dear God
to always embrace the Cross
like your Son Jesus Christ
where we can all be empty
of ourselves to be filled
with your Holy Spirit
and make your love
visible in us.
Amen.

A blessed week to everyone!

Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Our Lady of Fatima University
Valenzuela City
(lordmychef@gmail.com)

The heart of the priest

Lord My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul, 04 August 2025
Monday, Memorial of St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney, Priest
Numbers 11:4-15     <*{{{{>< + ><}}}}*>     Matthew 14:13-21

*St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney from https://liturgiadashoras.online/.*

People complain and ask me why our patron saint, St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney is always portrayed “unattractive” as old, balding and so thin who seemed to be so tired, even sad. Para daw hirap na hirap.

Usually I smile at them because when I entered the seminary, I felt the same way too upon seeing his images. But as I learned about his life and teachings, the more I realized St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney is actually one of the original “rock star” saints of the Church with his white, balding hair so much like Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin!

There is something so deeply within him when we try to feel and observe his portrayals in the arts as more than images but a reality and experience of a man deemed weak yet so strong with an intensity of a Michael Jordan in his life and ministry. He was another St. Paul who had truly let “Christ lived in him” (Gal. 2:20), “strongest when weakest” (2Cor.12:10) who declared with conviction that “the priesthood is the love of the heart of Jesus.” Hence in my prayers last night and today, I asked Jesus to give me a heart “so big, so wide to welcome everyone and life’s many challenges” (https://lordmychef.com/2025/08/03/praying-with-our-patron-saint-john-baptiste-marie-vianney/).

*Detail of a painting of the Sacred Heart of Jesus at Visitation Monastery, Marclaz, France from godongphoto / Shutterstock.*

The readings this Monday of the eighteenth week in Ordinary Time perfectly jibed the celebration of the Memorial of St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney as they spoke of the heart of the priest.

In the first reading we heard of Moses lamenting to God of the difficulty in dealing with his people who were so stubborn and refused to recognize God’s immense love for them, so similar with us priests in many occasions when we feel so frustrated and sad when parishioners fail to see the good things we are doing for them.

When Moses heard the people, family after family, crying at the entrance of their tents, so that the Lord became very angry, he was grieved. “Why do you treat your servant so badly?” Moses asked the Lord. “Why are you so displeased with me that you burden me with all this people?”… I cannot carry all this people by myself, for they are too heavy for me. If this is the way you will deal with me, then please do me the favor of killing me at once, so that I need no longer face this distress” (Numbers 11:10-11, 14-15).

Many times, we priests feel like Moses who cannot voice out problems with the people who would never understand it at all. Worst, people would even blame us priests why we work so hard or why do we bother at all with their lives. “Pabayaan na lang ninyo kami…sanay na kami” are what they often say. It can be frustrating when people refuse to match the fire and ardor of their priests.

In this scene, we find one of the many instances in the life of Moses that was centered on God in prayers. The heart of the priest is a heart in prayer. The attitude of Moses in the first reading conversing with God in prayer shows us that in our life and ministry, there is no one to turn to except God alone with whom we can be our most personal self, even dare God to “take us” or “kill us” when we are so fed up. The good news is, God never took those words seriously as he knew Moses and the prophets including us who spoke to him that way never knew what we were saying at all.

There is a saying that goes, “if you can’t bear the heat, leave the kitchen”; but, it cannot be applied with the priesthood that is neither a profession nor a job one can easily walk out from and start into another venture or career. Priesthood is a call or a “vocation” from God; however, priesthood is more of the Caller than the call. It is a life centered on prayer to become like Jesus Christ who alone feels and understands and appreciates all our ups and downs in the ministry. The more we get closer to Jesus in the Cross, the more we experience fulfillment that we would never dare to trade it for anything or anyone else, not even the prettiest woman on earth.

*Photo by author, Chapel of St. Francis Xavier, Sacred Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, March 2024.*

Priesthood is the love of the heart of Jesus that continues to be wounded and hurt by sins of men and women in this modern age so selfish and materialistic. Thus, every priest is called to be a “wounded healer” too like Christ who in his woundedness healed the wounds of others. We remind people of the paradox and scandal of the Cross of Jesus, of life itself by taking into heart Christ’s teaching, “For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it” (Mt. 16:25).

Let us now reflect on our gospel.

When Jesus heard of death of John the Baptist, he withdrew in a boat to a deserted place by himself. the crowds heard of this and followed him on for from their towns. When he disembarked and saw the vast crowd, his heart was moved with pity for them, and he cured their sick (Matthew 14:13-14).

Observe the brevity of Matthew in narrating the situation at the scene without losing its very soul and meaning especially for us priests: Jesus did not have any intentions to go after Herod nor to challenge him for his execution of John the Baptist who spoke the truth.

Instead, Jesus sought solitude. Like Moses in the first reading, Jesus turned to God in his grief and anguish of the death of John the Baptist. He crossed the lake to pray and be one with the Father to pour out his sadness and most of all, to reflect on what to do next after John’s death.

Jesus shows us in this scene of his going into solitude that our low points in life as priests are also our high points like Christ’s Transfiguration. Every prayer moment is a transfiguration moment because that is when we get closest with Jesus. It has been consistently proven in our collective and personal experiences as priests verified by studies that crises in the priesthood happen when we stop praying because that is detaching from Jesus Christ, our Caller.

Priesthood is not only difficult but very difficult starting with the vestments we have to wear. What a shame when priests prefer to do away with the proper vestments as well as wearing of shoes during celebrations of the Mass and other sacraments because the weather is so hot. What then are we going to bear if the weather is already a big issue for us? One of the teachings of St. John Vianney that I have always followed is the value of putting on good vestments in the celebration of Sacraments because they are a homily in themselves, proclaiming the glory and love of God for us all.

*Photo by FlickrBrett Streutker from catholic365.com.*

Many times, people forget priests have personal concerns and problems too, that we get hurt, get lonely, get sick and grieve at the death of family and friends. Despite all these lows in our life as priests, we go and follow the Caller Jesus Christ when people come and ask for our help and service. Woe to our brother priests who forget this and think more of themselves especially of their comfort!

See how when Jesus was praying in solitude and the crowd followed him, it was not difficult for him to forget his own worries that his heart was moved with pity upon seeing them disembarked from their boats. Despite his sadness at the death of John, Jesus taught the crowd who have followed him and healed the sick among them. And when the Twelve told him to drive away the crowd to search for their own food and lodging, Jesus told them to give them food themselves. What followed was the great miracle of the feeding of over five thousand people from five loaves of bread and two pieces of fish. It was the event that prepared the Twelve and the people to the Last Supper of the Lord and the road to Emmaus where Jesus was recognized at his “breaking of bread”.

The whole life of St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney was a prayer of praise and thanksgiving to God in Christ’s priesthood. He had a heart so big and wide, hearing confessions daily up to 16 hours! Pray for us your priests to have big hearts too to bear all the wounds and hurts because only the heart that suffers, that is “broken” can truly sing of the joys and pains of living, of the sense and meaning of serving to the point of being emptied, and of the healing and transforming power of Christ’s love and mercy. Amen. Pray for us your priests. Salamuch. Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, Our Lady of Fatima University, Valenzuela City (lordmychef@gmail.com).

*have not been to France nor do I know French but while searching for images of St. John Marie Vianney, I found this from the French website,* https://www.notrehistoireavecmarie.com/*; it is perhaps the depiction of the new pastor speaking to the young Antoine whom he asked for directions to Ars.*

Praying with our patron saint, John Baptiste Marie Vianney

Lord My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul, 04 August 2025
Monday, Memorial of St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney, Priest
Numbers 11:4-15     <*((((><  +  ><))))*>     Matthew 14:13-21

*I have not been to France nor do I know French but while searching for images of St. John Marie Vianney, I found this from the French website,* https://www.notrehistoireavecmarie.com/; *it is perhaps the depiction of the new pastor speaking to the young Antoine whom he asked for directions to Ars.*

On this feast of our Patron Saint,
John Baptiste Marie Vianney,
I praise and thank you dear Jesus
for the gift of vocation to the priesthood;
thank you for calling me to become your priest;
thank you for the courage and strength 
to accept your call;
most of all, thank you for your patience
in me despite my repeated sins
and failures as your priest.

Onn this feast of our Patron Saint,
John Baptiste Marie Vianney,
I pray to you Lord Jesus
our Eternal Priest to give me
a big heart,
a heart so wide to welcome
everyone and life's many
challenges.

When Jesus heard of death of John the Baptist, he withdrew in a boat to a deserted place by himself. the crowds heard of this and followed him on for from their towns. When he disembarked and saw the vast crowd, his heart was moved with pity for them, and he cured their sick (Matthew 14:13-14).

O Jesus,
only a heart so wide
like yours can take those 
kind of "beatings" -
to withdraw in silence,
perhaps cry in silence,
to be hurting alone with
the pain of the suffering and
death of a brother in ministry;
you bore all our pains
and went straight to the Father
to find solace and strength
for the terrible news nobody else
would really feel nor understand;
make me a good,
loving brother to other priests,
Jesus;
on the other hand,
despite your grief and sadness,
you did not drive away the crowd
so eager to have you in feeding them
with your words and teachings,
in healing their sick notwithstanding
the pains you have in the death of
John the Baptist; where did you get
that kind of immense feeling of 
oneness with the crowd
that when you saw them,
your "heart was moved with pity
for them" and cured their sick
and eventually fed them not only
with your words but with true bread!

That is why I pray
for a bigger heart as your priest,
Lord Jesus -
a heart so big to willingly accept
and bear every pain 
and hurt in your name
because only a wounded heart
like yours can truly sing
of the joys and pains of living,
of the sense and meaning of serving,
of the healing power of your love.

Forgive me, Jesus,
when many times I feel like
giving up,
complaining to you
like Moses
 in today's first reading,
hurting deep inside
when your people could not
see and realize
all the good things you have
been doing for them;
hence,
I pray for a big heart
to bear the pains and
disappointments of your people
even if they are not reasonable
nor valid at all;
most of all,
give me a big heart,
Lord,
because according to
St. John Baptiste
Marie Vianney,
"the priesthood
is the love
 of the heart
 of Jesus."
Amen.

St. John Baptiste Marie Vianney,
Pray for us priests!
Amen.

Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, Our Lady of Fatima University, Valenzuela City (lordmychef@gmail.com).

*From* https://liturgiadashoras.online/.

Healing our wounds

Quiet Storm by Lord My Chef, 31 July 2025

*Photo by author, somewhere in Rizal en route to Infanta, Quezon, March 2023.*

It is widely held that our physical well-being has a direct relationship with our spiritual condition and vice versa. That is why aside from the treatment of physical sickness, there is also a need to address the spiritual well-being of patients for their “healing” which is more wholistic in nature and meaning.

Jesus Christ himself showed this relationship of the physical and the spiritual. The gospels are filled with accounts of Jesus not only treating the sick but also of healing them by first touching them (physical) then telling them how their sins were forgiven or how great was their faith (spiritual).

Here we find that healing involves the total person in body, mind, heart and soul. Healing is not just the restoration of health but transformation of the person. This is the spirit behind hospital ministry. Patients eventually die but may have still experienced healing when properly prepared for death by a priest or pastor or a nun through counseling and administering of the Sacraments of Confession, Viaticum, and Anointing of the Sick.

As I immersed myself in this ministry since 2021 as chaplain of a university with a medical center, I have realized too that it is actually more of what Jesus is doing to me than of what I am doing to our patients and our medical professionals. Indeed, priesthood is a ministry seeking new directions in Jesus Christ that is most true in the hospital ministry when the tables – or beds – are turned on me as patient needing medical and spiritual attention!

Twice I have been rushed to the ER for minor accidents: first in 2023 and second only this Sunday when I slipped in our garage and hurt my left knee. While recovering in my room from this recent injury, I decided to put into writing to share with you some lessons from my two experiences that may hopefully help in the healing process of those who are wounded physically and emotionally.

*Photo by author, Hidden Spring & Resort, Calauan, Laguna, February 2025.*

First thing to do when we are wounded physically and spiritually or emotionally is to have the wounds “cleansed”.

We were having a tug-o-war during our 2023 team-building when the rope snapped and sent me rolling down the ground. I quickly stood up and brushed the dirt and blood on my left arm, declining offers of others to wash and clean my wounds as I insisted to them sanay po ako sa ganito.

But when our university physician approached me on my way to the wash area to check my wounds and asked if I had had anti-tetanus shots before because I would be needing one that afternoon, everything changed. Fear crept in me with all the scary imaginations running through my mind as I asked him why the tetanus shots? The doctor explained that the ground is dirty with harmful bacteria including animal shit that may infect my wounds; hence, the need to first wash my wounds with clean water and soap and get anti-tetanus shots for sure. Oh my God…

Looking back to that experience after this recent fall (when I got another pair of tetanus shots), I realized the same thing is true when our heart and soul are wounded: we need to wash them clean with sincerity and honesty of one’s self. Cleansing our spiritual and emotional wounds require self-confrontation, no ifs nor buts why it happened. It is recalling the incident no matter how painful it may be like in washing our physical wounds with water and soap to clean ourselves of harmful microbes of anger and hatred that might infect us later.

Cleansing our emotional and spiritual wounds is being true to ourselves to face, accept, then embrace the realities why and how it happened. Crying may be good as a catharsis which is literally a cleansing process. Cleansing our spiritual and emotional wounds is suspending any conclusions that may lead to unnecessary self-pity and self-blame of the incident by facing the mirror like when after we have washed our wounds on any part of the body to check and see its extent of damage. It is normal to be sad and even angry because it is painful as it is something hurting from deep inside us. The more we face our wounds, the more we become at home with them.

*Photo by author, Katmon Nature Sanctuary & Beach Resort, Infanta, Quezon, March 2023.*

Next is disinfect the wounds and apply medications to prevent infection. After washing my wounds with soap and water that Sunday, I disinfected these with Cutasept that resulted in more pain as if the antiseptic solution was fiercely battling the germs and microbes trying to infect my left knee.

When our soul is wounded, we do the same procedure after cleansing by facing the realities of pains and hurts with prayer, our spiritual antiseptic. Even doctors prescribe prayers to their patients in critical situation. And here is the interesting part in this process: prayer does not change the situation, it will not remove the wounds even the scars in our memory and soul; but, prayers make us stronger and better after the spiritual and emotional woundings we have had. Most of all, prayer facilitates our healing process because it opens us to Jesus, the only doctor who will heal us completely from both physical and spiritual and emotional wounds.

Part of disinfecting and applying medications to our spiritual and emotional wounds is seeking help from others, finding Jesus our healer from priests and nuns, pastors and counsellors, and persons you look up to for their wisdom and maturity in Christ. Like when we are physically wounded that we go consult doctors, the same thing is needed when we are emotionally and spiritually wounded. Prayers like disinfectants and medicines are not everything; persons give the personal touch of the spiritual disinfection and healing of our brokenness inside. There is no need to let everyone know our spiritual and emotional wounds; simply share your hurts with someone who could help you “treat” your wounds and willing to journey with you in its long process of healing.

Do not broadcast these in social media which would only worsen the situation. That’s rubbing salt on your wounds because not everyone out there cares for you! It will just feed the frenzy of the many “low life” hungry for anything negative to feast upon. Every time I come across selfies of people while at the ER or confined in the hospital, I wonder how sick they really are that they could still hold their cellphone while being treated for an injury. Getting sick physically and emotionally is always an occasion for more prayers and conversion in Christ.

Finally, dress your wounds for protection. I am from Generation X and most of us were never hospitalized nor brought to the ER for any treatment while still a child despite our many mischiefs and misadventures while growing up.

We only had our mother as doctor who treated our wounds with agua oxinada and gamot na pula that was so painful that we need to blow dry our wounds once dabbed with it. Then, mom would leave our wounds open like that, no kuritas and gauze because makukulob ang sugat, magtutubig at magnanana (infection).That is why after that 2023 injury, I did not follow the doctor’s instruction to cover my wounds on my left arm with gauze; I would later learn its value in a painful and embarrassing way a week after when I was called to anoint a patient in our ICU.

On my way there, the elevator door suddenly closed that instinctively I used my left wounded arm to stop it. Anyway, I thought the wounds were already healing and felt no pain at all when hit by the elevator door. When I entered the ICU, the nurses and doctors stared at me and asked what had happened because blood was dripping from my left arm. It was only then I realized the elevator door had scratched my wounds!

What a shame that doctors and nurses attended first to my wounds before letting me anoint the patient; I felt so embarrassed especially when the attending physician explained the need to cover wounds for protection from dirt and other elements as well as accidents like what had happened to me at the elevator.

*Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 20 March 2025.*

From that experience, I realized that one reason our spiritual and emotional wounds never get healed is because we “expose” them. When a person is wounded in heart or soul, it is not enough we clean and disinfect and treat them. We need to protect them from further pains and hurts from those who have inflicted their emotional wounds. Protecting them is to stop blaming them in causing their inner pains and hurts. Nasaktan na nga, nasisi pa. Ibinaon pa!

Friends and loved ones are the spiritual gauze who cover and protect spiritual wounds from more hurts and pains. They are the Band-aid strips protecting those spiritually and emotionally wounded by being at their side, assuring them with love and support, of still believing them despite their painful experiences. There is no need to engage the guilty offenders into a skirmish. If their wounds were of their own doing, soften the impact by motivating them to be better, to hope for the best, that it is not the end of their lives. And most of all, assure them their life is not defined by their emotional and spiritual wounds.

Protecting those wounded emotionally and spiritually means helping them find anew their true selves and worth as persons who are beloved children of God. Protecting them like gauze is helping them bear the long process of healing.

There is a saying that “time heals” but time can only heal when there is human intervention in the treatment of our emotional wounds aided by prayers and faith in God. Time alone, no matter how long the years are, cannot heal us in itself if we remain exposed to dirt and elements that contribute to “infecting” us further. Or worst, if we remain with the very causes of our wounds.

For those hurting spiritually or emotionally, may Jesus Christ heal you and give you the courage to confront and deal with your inner wounds and pains. Seek God and seek persons too to help you. Amen. May God bless you on your road to recovery and healing! Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, Our Lady of Fatima University, Valenzuela City (lordmychef@gmail.com).

Mothers’ nine lives

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 07 July 2025

For the first time in 25 years since daddy’s passing, I did not deliver any homily during his death anniversary Mass in our home last June 17, 2025. My sisters readily agreed when I told them after the gospel proclamation “hindi na ako mag-homily at baka maiyak lang tayo.”

It was the second time we celebrated daddy’s death anniversary after mommy’s passing last May 7, 2024 but, it was only at that time when I truly felt the deeper realities of both parents being gone, of being “ulilang lubos”.

Perhaps that’s because we have been preoccupied for over two decades with mommy’s grief when dad passed away right on her 61st birthday before dawn of June 17, 2000. We were at a loss how to pacify her with such a surreal date for the two most loving couple we have known first hand. During my dad’s wake, we have to warn everybody not to mention anything about mom’s birthday.

From then on, mommy practically stopped celebrating her birthday even when she turned 70, 75, and 80 as we threw small gatherings at home for her siblings and friends but she would always remind us all not to forget it was also daddy’s death anniversary.

That is why I have always dreaded the days approaching June 17 because I felt sad for her. I thought after her death last year, it would be different because we would no longer see mommy sad on her birthday mourning dad’s death. I told myself, “hindi na malulungkot si mommy… hindi na rin kami malulungkot.”

But I was wrong.

Hindi na nga malungkot ang mommy ko ngayon pero ako naman ang malungkot – malungkot na malungkot. Noon ngang araw ng Linggo bago mag-June 17, naalala ko ang mommy at daddy bigla kaya naluha ako sa bahagi ng Ama Namin noong aming Misa sa Dambana. Wala na sila dito. Iyon una ko nadama, ulila na nga kami at saka pa lamang naisip ko magkasama na sila sa buhay na walang hanggan.

Indeed, the pains of losing our loved ones never decrease through time but actually increase. Those pains will remain until we are reunited with them in death and eternity.

There are pains in life meant to remain, that cannot be removed like a hole or a scar in our hearts not to burden nor hurt us but to uplift us actually. These wounds keep us in persevering in love to keep our relationships alive with those left behind after the deaths of our loved ones like parents or children. These wounds enable our hearts to sing of faith, hope and love in God all merciful who would one day unite us all together as one family after our days on this earth. These pains make us see the very thin line separating us from eternity, telling us that life goes on among us even after death. They open our eyes to see beyond, to have visions of the future.

*Photo by author, my mom’s kitty bank, 10.5 inches to the tip of ears.*

While these things were running through me during our family dinner that night, my brother presented to me mommy’s “kitty bank” which is older than I am, 61 years old. It is one of her most cherished possessions she truly took great care as far as I can remember.

I have been thinking about it recently if it were still around though I never had any interest with it when growing up as a child except that I enjoyed counting the rare coins inside mostly dating back to the American occupation with the usual designs of the US flag and an eagle.

That evening on dad’s 25th death anniversary that could have been mom’s 86th birthday if she were still alive today, I felt a very strong attraction with that “kitty bank” whose face seemed to be speaking to me.

*Photo by author, my mom’s kitty bank, circa 1964.*

As I held it closer to see its many fissures and tapes following the wear and tear of over 60 years, I saw mommy again, of how she loved us and life so much, especially cats, dogs and fish, and most of all, plants- being a certified tita herself. Our house may be small but mommy lovingly took care of her pets and plants, always talking with them even after having a stroke.

Like the cat with its nine lives, death is never the end but the prelude to new life or, more lives hereafter.

And that is the nobility and giftedness of every mother – even after they are gone, they continue to bring forth and nurture life. God bless everyone… and the cats.

*Photo by author, my mom’s kitty bank in my room.*

Praying for joy

Lord My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday in the Sixth Week of Easter, 30 May 2025
Acts 18:9-18     <*((((><  +  ><))))*>     John 16:20-23

*Photo by author, Cabo da Roca, Pundaquit, San Antonio, Zambales, 14 May 2025.*

In a few days you are
going to "leave" us, Jesus;
this Sunday is your Ascension,
your physical departure from us
and you described so well our situation:

Jesus said to his disciples: “Amen, amen, I say to you, you will weep and mourn, while the world rejoices; you will grieve, but your grief will become joy. When a woman is in labor, as she is in anguish because her hour has arrived; but when she has given birth to a child, she no longer remembers the pain because of her joy that a child has been born into the world. So you also are now in anguish. But I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you. On that day you will not question me about anything. Amen, amen, I say to you, whatever you ask the Father in my name he will give you” (John 16:20-23).

What has been "born"
in me in your Rising from the dead?
What is that joy like a woman
in the pangs of childbirth
suddenly becoming a joy so
incomparable?

Oh, it is that joy of having you
in my heart, Jesus:
I have found joy more in my heart
than outside of me;
your joy is that assurance
you are with me always
no matter what,
as certain as the rising and
the setting of the sun,
as lovely as the blooming of flowers,
soothing like the hush of the wind
or the gushing of water in a river
or the rush of the waves to
the shore.

Keep that joy in my heart,
Jesus that no one can take away;
a joy in my heart that even
if I do not receive the things
I ask in prayer,
I still believe,
I still hope,
I still rejoice
in you.

Sorry, Jesus,
I still question you on anything
despite that joy of knowing you,
 of having you
but many times I wonder
why all the pains and sufferings
with me and those close to me;
there are times,
Lord that I lose my heart
that I could not feel that joy of you
when you don't answer
my prayers.

But, 
to still keep on praying
even if it not answered at all
is already pure joy in you,
Jesus!

Like peace,
true joy is so difficult
and elusive when not found
in you, Jesus
that we always have to wait
for you,
feel you,
suffer and cry with you
and sometimes die in you
so that joy shall be
born in us
again
and again
and again.
Amen.

Embracing life’s paradox

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday, Week II in Ordinary Time, Year I, 20 January 2025
Hebrews 5:1-10 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Mark 2:18-22

*Photo by author, sunrise at St. Paul Spirituality Center, Pico, La Trinidad, Benguet, 06 January 2025.*

Praise and glory to you,
God our loving Father!
Thank you for this wonderful
Monday as we pray for one 
another, especially to those
still baffled with life's many
mysteries, its many
paradoxes beginning to
appear anew as we dive
into Ordinary Time.

Teach us to take into heart
Jesus Christ's teaching today:

“Likewise, no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the skins are ruined. Rather, new wine is poured into fresh wineskins” (Mark 2:22).

Help us change our attitudes in life,
Jesus: make us realize that like
your life, our life is always a
mixture of joy and sufferings;
most of all,
make us experience
in your coming into our human reality
as our Eternal High Priest,
you have brought newness and
significance in storage and taste
of wine that symbolizes life itself,
as you put a new vigor of spirit
in celebrating life.

*Photo by author, sunset in Atok, Benguet, 27 December 2024.*

“Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered; and when he was made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him…” (Hebrews 5:8-9).

How lovely and
wonderful to realize
how your true humanity,
dear Jesus, actually makes you
more than less an effective Priest
to truly "bridge" us
with the Father and one another;
like you Jesus,
we pray the Father to take away
our pains but in your example
on the Cross,
we learn how God
is actually found in pain!

Change our attitudes
to be like you, Jesus
 who came to join
us in our many sufferings
to show us that in our dealing
with our own pain and the pain of others,
that is when we grow
in strength and maturity,
in love and compassion
that eventually lead us
to deeper and true joy
in you our Lord.

Help us embrace 
this paradox of life, Jesus,
that a life devoid of the challenge
of pain is an incomplete life;
and when we are puzzled
by the many sufferings in us
and around us, let us gaze into
your Cross to reflect,
"Why did God not spare
you his own Son?"
Amen.

*Photo by author, St. Paul Spirituality Center, Pico, La Trinidad, Benguet, 04 January 2025.*

Keeping our light shining

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday in the Thirty-first Week of Ordinary Time, Year II, 06 November 2024
Philippians 2:12-18 ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> Luke 14:25-33

*Photo by author, Fatima Ave., Valenzuela City, 25 July 2024.*

Grant me,
dear Jesus
the serenity and composure
of St. Paul:
so peaceful,
so dignified,
so free 
in the face of death.

Do everything without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine like lights in the world, as you hold on to the word of life… But, even if I am poured out as a libation upon the sacrificial service of your faith, I rejoice and share my joy with all of you. In the same way you also should rejoice and share your joy with me (Philippians 2:14-16, 17-18).

Many times O Lord
the burdens are too heavy
and unbearable,
with pains and suffering
so overwhelming
that I really wonder
if I would make any difference at all;
but, you are always here
present
in the "nick of time"
sending people reminding me
of jokes I have long forgotten but
still tickle them;
or simple lessons I could not recall
but they have kept
and guided them through life;
or music I made them listened to
that have lingered in their heads;
or books and poems
 that have opened their horizons.

Teach me, Jesus
to renounce everything I have,
empty me of my pride,
of my self to be filled with you only
so that I may truly shine like
light in this world so at home
and fascinated with neons
 and klieg lights
that mislead them to darkness.
Amen.

Praying for the patience of Job

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday in the Twenty-sixth Week of Ordinary Time, Year II, 03 October 2024
Job 19:21-27 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Luke 10:1-12

*Photo by Mr. Jay Javier, 07 September 2024.*

God our loving Father:

Grant me the "patience of Job".
Like him, everyday I go through many
trials and sufferings:
some are of my own-making,
some can be explained and understood,
but most often,
many of them are a mystery,
beyond explanations,
beyond comprehension.
Yes, Lord:
many times I have so many
questions in life that are left
unanswered but like Job,
I believe You alone knows
everything I am going through,
especially the pains and hurts,
the difficulties and hardships.

But as for me, I know that my Vindicator lives, and that he will at last stand forth upon the dust; Whom I myself shall see: my own eyes, not another’s, shall behold him, And from my flesh I shall see God: my inmost being is consumed with longing (Job 19:25-27).

Lord Jesus Christ:

Thank you for calling me,
for sending me into your
great harvest;
how lovely are your words,
"The harvest is abundant
 but the laborers are few;
so ask the master
to send out laborers
for his harvest" (Matthew 10:2);
so many times,
we think the solution to our
problems are found in things
without knowing nor realizing
what we need are more people
willing to labor with somebody else's
pains and hurts,
people willing to labor
for people so lost in the mysteries
of life saddled with many things
without clear explanations
except to be patient like Job,
trusting that in the end,
our vindication is in You.
Amen.

Hopes amid pains

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Tuesday, Memorial of Therese of the Child Jesus, Virgin & Doctor of Church, 01 October 2024
Job 3:1-3, 11-17, 20-23 <*[[[[>< +. ><]]]]*> Luke 9:51-56

Thank you,
dear God our loving Father
for the month of October!
Most of all,
thank you for sending us 
Jesus Christ your Son
and thus "opened your Kingdom
to those who are humble
and to little ones" like
St. Therese of the Child Jesus
whose memorial we celebrate
today.


Lead us to follow
trustingly in the little way
of St. Therese
of the Child Jesus
especially in bearing patiently
filled with hope life's
many sufferings like Job.

Job opened his mouth and cursed his day. Job spoke out and said: Why is light given to the toilers, and life to the bitter in spirit? they wait for death and it comes not; they search for it rather than for hidden treasures, Rejoice in it exultingly, and are glad when they reache the grave: Those whose path is hidden from them, and whom God has hemmed in! (Job 3:1-2, 20-23)

Fill us too
with true hope,
dear Jesus like You,
Job and St. Therese,
a hope that trusts in God
even if things are sure
to get worst,
even end in death;
like You, Jesus,
may we resolutely
determine to journey to
Jerusalem even when
we know it could lead
to our passion and death;
help us live in hope
like St. Therese
that despite her sickness,
she did everything filled with
love for the Church missionaries;
may our pains in life
like St. Therese and Job
have both experienced
help us understand
 the pain of others
so that we may bring healing
compassion to their situation;
make us realize that
a world totally free of pain
can actually become a place
of total selfishness
and self-indulgence
because it is through
pains we truly love and hope
and become holy and saint.
Amen.