Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
The Seven Last Words, 07 April 2023
Photo by author, Chapel of the Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 2014.
It was now about noon and darkness came over the whole land until three in the afternoon because of an eclipse of the sun. Then the veil of the temple was torn down the middle. Jesus cried our in a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit”; and when he had said this he breathed his last.
Luke 23:44-46
Do you have a “bucket list”, of things to do before turning a certain age or before dying? Very often we read in social media articles of sample “bucket lists”, of things to do, things to see, food to eat before one dies as if these are the ultimate things or cities or food in the world!
I am sorry I do not believe in such “bucket list” no matter how good is that movie of the same title. It is all non-sense! Why spend so much time and energies of things to do before dying or turning 50 or 60 or whatever age when we should be making the most out of every present moment because we could die any time!
We will all die one day for sure. But, will we die well? Our death is our most wonderful and lasting gift to our loved ones if we die for them and for others, if we lived a fruitful life we can leave for them. The question we should be asking is “how do we live our lives meaningfully now in the present so that when we die, our lives would continue to bear fruit in the generations that will follow us?” Stop wondering or asking about what we can do in the future or the years we have left to live because that is highly hypothetical. It has not happened yet and might not even happen at all if we die soon enough. Get real by living fully in the present! Coming to terms with death is coming to terms with life. The moment we realize we shall die one day, that is when we start living authentically. And joyfully.
Jesus died so well on that Good Friday because he was able to surrender everything to the Father and for us all because he lived fully that is why he was able to surrender or give or commend his spirit. How about us? How sad that many times our loved ones left us with much pain and regrets because we never fully lived with them nor enjoy precious moments with them while still alive. Live fully in love and joy, forgiveness and mercy. Celebrate life daily. Life is too short to spend it in dramas and wishful thinking.
At the hour of our death like Jesus on that Good Friday, can we also give others and God our spirit of love and mercy, our spirit of joy and kindness? Or, we are still busy thinking what else we can do in this life? What if we are called back to God now, at this very moment?
Let us pray.
Lord Jesus Christ,
grant me the grace to live
my life in you,
with you,
and through you
to the fullest in every here and now
so that if ever I should die any moment,
I am able to commend to the Father
my spirit back to him
without regrets,
without pains,
without sin
but only with joy and gratitude
that my loved ones would
feel and nurture
until we all meet again
in your kingdom in heaven.
Amen.
Thank you for following our reflections on the Seven Last Words of Jesus on the Cross. May you have a meaningful Holy Week and a joyful Easter! God bless you!
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
The Seven Last Words, 06 April 2023
Photo by author, Chapel of the Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 2014.
There was a vessel filled with common wine. So they put a sponge soaked in wine on a sprig of hyssop and put it up to his mouth. When Jesus had taken the wine, he said, “It is finished.” And bowing his head, he handed over the spirit.
John 19:29-30
Every Maundy Thursday, people await that most unique part of the Mass every year when the priest washes the feet of some members of the community. As a priest, it is one of the most humbling experiences I have had when a brother priest washed my feet on that Mass I attended in 2008 and 2021.
But there is something more beautiful to the ritual washing of feet. It is the context and words that accompany that: “Before the feast of Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to pass from this world to the Father. He loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end” (John 13:1).
The Greek word for the “end” is telos which is not just a terminal end in itself but indicates or connotes direction. Or fulfillment and perfection, not just a ceasing or end or stoppage of life or any operation.
When Jesus said on the Cross “It is finished”, he meant he had fulfilled his mission, that is, he had perfectly loved us to the end by giving us his very life.
At his death on the Cross, Jesus showed us perfectly in no uncertain terms his love for us, the Father’s love for us that he had told to Nicodemus at the start of the fourth gospel that “God so loved the world that he gave his only Son” (Jn. 3:16).
There on the Cross this was definitively fulfilled and perfected more than ever. Jesus did not have to die on the Cross but he chose to go through it because of his love for us.
Here we find the beautiful meaning of love. It is not just obeying the commandments nor being good and kind with everyone. Love in its totality is the perfection of life. It is our only destiny in life, our call to life from the very beginning. Love, love, love. Keep on loving until it hurts. Until the end.
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us.
1 John 4:11-12
From that same letter, John declared at the very start that God is love which according to Pope Benedict XVI in his first encyclical is the most profound statement about God found only in Christianity.
My dear friends, only God can love us perfectly. Only Jesus can love us perfectly like what he did on the Cross. Human love is always imperfect. In our imperfect love, let us find Jesus filling up, making whole, perfecting our love for each other. Let us die in our selves sometimes when we have to let go with each one’s imperfection like when they make side comments. Forget all about revenge. Forgive. Understand the shortcomings of everyone. Accept and own the pains and hurts inflicted on us by our loved ones like our mom and dad, your former wife or husband, your friends, of those who have hurt you in words and deeds. That is being like Christ, dying on the Cross because of love.
Let us pray for those we love and those who love us despite our imperfections.
Lord Jesus Christ,
how I wish I could love until the end,
how I wish I could say too like you
"It is finished";
forgive me because many times with me,
the pains and hurts I have had are not yet
finished, even festering inside me,
eating me up, rotting inside me
that I could not grow and bloom in you.
Forgive me and teach me to forgive too
for it is in forgiving we truly love
perfectly like you.
Amen.
Photo by my former student, Ms. April Oliveros on their ascent to Mt. Pulag, 25 March 2023.
The Lord Is My Chef Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Maundy Thursday, 06 April 2023
Exodus 12:1-8, 11-14 + 1 Corinthians 11:23-26 + John 13:1-15
Photo by author, Holy Thursday 2019, Parokya ni San Juan Apostol at Ebanghelista, Bagbaguin, Sta. Maria, Bulacan.
Tonight we begin the most solemn days of the year called the “Holy Triduum” of Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Easter Vigil. All roads rightly lead to the Parish Church at sundown for the celebration of the Holy Eucharist that begins with the Tabernacle empty. There will be no dismissal at the end of the Mass, it is open ended. Most of unique of all in tonight’s Mass is the ritual of the washing of feet of some members of the community.
But there is something more beautiful to the ritual washing of feet. It is the context and words from John’s gospel that set the mood of tonight’s mood and tone of celebration as well as the hint of the meaning of Good Friday too.
Before the feast of Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to pass from this world to the Father. He loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end.
John 13:1
Photo by author, Holy Thursday 2019, Parokya ni San Juan Apostol at Ebanghelista, Bagbaguin, Sta. Maria, Bulacan.
First thing we have to consider here is the fact that “Jesus knew his hour had come to pass from this world to the Father.” He was never caught by surprise. Jesus knew everything, was never taken over by events. Luke said it beautifully after his identification as the Christ at Caesarea Philippi, When the days for his being taken up were fulfilled, he resolutely determined to journey to Jerusalem (Lk. 9:51).
We have heard in the first reading the story of the exodus of the Israelites, their passover from Egypt to the Promised Land, their passover from slavery to freedom that was perfected by Christ’s own pasch beginning tonight with his Passion, Death and Resurrection. This is our call, to live Christ’s Paschal Mystery daily, to be one in him, one with him, one through him in passing over life’s many challenges and trials.
To passover means to grow, to mature, to overcome, to hurdle. Every day we go through many series of passovers, from sickness to health, from sinfulness to forgiveness, from failures to victory, from our little deaths to our daily rising to new life in Jesus. This we can only accomplish with love, the kind of love by Jesus Christ.
That is the second, most important thing we must consider in John’s brief introduction to our gospel tonight, Jesus “loved his own in the world and he loved them to the end”. The Greek word for the “end” is telos which is not just a terminal end in itself but indicates or connotes direction. Or fulfillment and perfection, not just a ceasing or end or stoppage of life or any operation. Jesus knew everything that is why his life here on earth had direction which is back to the Father, with us. Everything he said and did was out of love for the Father and for us.
From google.
Love is the sole reason Jesus came to the world to save us because we have failed to love from the very beginning. It is love that Jesus showed us on that Holy Thursday evening to be fully expressed on Good Friday when he died on the Cross. His whole life was love because he himself is love. This he showed when he washed the apostles feet and after that, asked them and us to do the same with each other. That is love’s highest point when we are able to get to our lowest point of service and love. In our daily passover, it is love that moves us to keep on going with life’s many ups and downs because we love our parents, our siblings, your wife or husband, your children. Our vocation and the people entrusted to us. We go through our passover we because we love.
When Jesus died on the Cross, he said, “It is finished” – meaning, he had fulfilled his mission, that is, he had perfectly loved us to the end by giving us his very life. At his death on the Cross, Jesus showed us perfectly his love for us, the Father’s love for us that he had told to Nicodemus at the start of John’s gospel that “God so loved the world that he gave his only Son” (Jn. 3:16).
This is the love Jesus spoke of during that supper that rightly prompted St. Paul to put into writing, the very first one to do so in the New Testament:
Photo by author, 2019.
Brothers and sisters: I received from the Lord what I also handed on to you, that the Lord Jesus, on the night he was handed over, took bread, and, after he had given thanks broke it and said, “This is my body that is for you…” In the same way also the cup, after supper, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood. Do this in remembrance of me.”
1 Corinthians 11:23-24, 25
There on the Cross this was definitively fulfilled and perfected more than ever. Jesus did not have to die on the Cross but he chose to go through it because of his love for us.
Here we find the beautiful meaning of love expressed to us in the celebration of the Holy Eucharist. More than obedience to commandments and keeping the laws of God by being good and kind with everyone, love is the perfection of life.
Love is our true destiny – end – in life, our call to life from the very beginning.
Keep on loving until it hurts. Until the end because God is love as John wrote in his first letter where he beautifully expressed, Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. yet, if we love one another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us(1 Jn. 4:11-12).
Love, love, love.
Photo by Ms. April Oliveros, Mt. Pulag, 25 March 2023.
My dear friends, only God can love us perfectly. Only Jesus can love us perfectly like what he did on the Cross.
Human love is always imperfect. That is why Jesus showed us the example of washing the feet of his apostles at the Last Supper.
In the Holy Mass, we all bow down before God and with everyone at the start to confess our sins, to admit our sinfulness “in what we have done and failed to do.”
In the Eucharist, Jesus fills up, completes our imperfect love with his love found in his words, in his peace we share with others, and most especially in his Body and Blood we receive.
St. Paul rightly reminded us of this meaning of the Eucharist, For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the death of the Lord until he comes (1 Cor. 11:26). This is why we have to celebrate Mass every Sunday. Most especially on holy days like tonight and Easter. Please, complete the Holy Triduum until Easter. Go on vacation some other date. Give these days to God who gave us his Son Jesus Christ by dying on the Cross for us.
Let us pray silently, be wrapped and awed by that mystery of the Eucharist Jesus established on that Holy Thursday evening at the Upper room.
Dearest Jesus,
teach us to love you more
by imitating your love,
of humbly going down to serve
even those who betray us,
of bending our hearts
to forego all bitterness
and festering anger within,
"let our tongues sing the
mysteries telling of your Body,
price excelling of your Blood"
in a life of loving service,
of daily dying in you
with you and
through you.
Amen.
Have a blessed and meaningful Holy Triduum. Please pray and reflect on God’s love for us these days at home, in the church.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
The Seven Last Words, 05 April 2023
Photo by author, Chapel of the Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 2014.
After this, aware that everything was now finished, in order that the scripture might be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I thirst.” There was a vessel filled with common wine. So they put a sponge soaked in win on a sprig of hyssop and put it up to his mouth.
John 19:28-29
This is one of the remarkable scenes in the fourth gospel, our Lord Jesus Christ feeling thirsty, the second time as recorded by John. The first was in the town of Sychar in Samaria when Jesus sat by Jacob’s well at noon and asked a Samaritan woman who came to draw water, “Give me a drink” (Jn. 4:7). A beautiful conversation followed between Jesus who was thirsty and the Samaritan woman, thirsting for God, for love and mercy.
Unlike being hungry for food which we can always bear because its feeling is localized in the stomach that we can easily forego by catching some sleep, thirst is different. When we are thirsty, we feel our whole body sapped dry even to our fingertips that we feel so weak, even affecting our mental faculties. That is why, thirst means more than physical but something deeper that concerns our very soul and being.
Here we find Jesus truly human, thirsting not just for water like us but most of all, for love and attention.
See also that for John, water is one of the most significant signs of Jesus Christ. His first “sign” as John would call his miracles was at the wedding feast at Cana when Jesus turned water into wine. After that wedding, Nicodemus came to Jesus at night where he first mentioned the need to be born in water and spirit (Jn. 3:5). It was after that night when Jesus went to Sychar and asked water from the Samaritan woman with whome he identified himself as “the living water (Jn. 4:10)”.
Here again is Jesus thirsty, but not just asking for water.
How foolish are we in responding to him like the Roman soldiers who gave him an ordinary wine. Worst, there are times we give him tepid, or perhaps turbid water that tastes so awful like that ordinary wine offered by the Romans at Golgotha.
Here is our living water, Jesus Christ who promised that “whoever drinks the water I shall give will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (Jn. 4:14) thirsting for us, for our love and attention because he alone can quench our thirsts in life.
Jesus is the wife and mother who thirsts for the love and affection of her unfaithful husband and wayward son or daughter who think only of themselves.
Jesus is the husband and father who thirsts for simple calls and expressions of concern from his family those back home while toiling abroad or in the high seas as an OFW or thirsting for understanding and care from those around him when he forgets so many things due to Alzheimer’s or paralyzed by a stroke or handicap.
Jesus is the young man or woman who thirsts for time and presence of a sibling or parents who could not find meaning and directions in life despite the money, clothes and gadgets the world offers.
Jesus is the person nearest to you thirsting for warmth and company, or simply a smile or a friendly gaze that assures him or her that “you are welcomed”.
Let us not be like those Roman soldiers or that Samaritan woman looking for material water to give Jesus present in every person we meet. Many times, the best water is found inside our hearts, deep in our souls where Jesus dwells with his abounding love and mercy, kindness and forgiveness. Let us thirst more for Jesus for he alone can quench our thirsts!
Let us pray:
Dearest Lord Jesus,
forgive me
when I quench my thirst
with things the world offers
that often leave me
more thirsty,
more dry,
more empty;
let me have more of YOU
to share more of YOU
our living water
who quenches our
deepest thirsts
for life's meaning
and fulfillment.
Amen.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
The Seven Last Words, 02 April 2023
Photo by author, Chapel of the Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 2014.
Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” He replied to him, “Amen, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”
Luke 23:42
Every time we feel good, whenever we see something so beautiful, whenever we are with those we love, we describe the feelings as “like paradise” or “heaven”. For us, paradise is all bliss. No sickness, no problems, no sufferings, nothing bad, nothing dark, nothing unpleasant. It is all good. In fact, perfect.
And that is why heaven or paradise is! From the ancient Persian word paradiso, it referred to the innermost room in the palace where only the most trusted ministers of the King were allowed to enter along with his immediate family, From that came the idea that paradise must be so beautiful that the Greek translators of the Bible used it to refer to heaven as God’s dwelling. After all, our God is the only One who is perfect and supreme than any king in the world.
Recall that when Adam and Eve sinned, they were banished from Paradise that was henceforth closed until that Good Friday when Jesus promised Paradise – of all people – to a former thief!
Yes, Paradise is for every sinner ready to beg forgiveness, ready to claim Jesus Christ as our Savior!
And that is just one of the surprising things about Paradise or Heaven according to Jesus on that Good Friday.
See that Jesus never promised “Paradise” when He was freely going around Galilee, preaching and healing the people, when He was dining with sinners and tax collectors, when He was very well and strong.
Jesus promised Paradise when he was dying there on the Cross, not when He was strong and free!
See also how He said the words to Dimas, “today you will be with me in Paradise”.
Jesus promised Paradise at that very moment they were on the Cross, hanging and dying. Not later when they died nor on Sunday when He resurrected from the dead.
Jesus promised Paradise at that very moment they were suffering and dying, in extreme, excruciating pains never imagined by anyone, presumably with all the fears, negative thoughts and feelings that went with it.
And that is precisely when we enter Paradise with Jesus, too.
When we are suffering from our sickness and disabilities especially over a long period of time, when we are deep in pains in our heart for all the hurts inflicted by a loved one, when we are old and bed-ridden awaiting the final moment of death, when we are in agony for the loss of a loved one, when deep in trials and disappointments, or whenever we are so weak and dying literally or figuratively speaking.
That is when we slowly enter Paradise.
In a world where the most prescribed medicine is the pain reliever, where everything is invented to minimize even eradicate difficulties and hardships, Jesus is reminding us that we enter Paradise when we are with Him suffering there on the Cross.
That is the value and meaning of the Cross we always evade these days. It is not all suffering but also a foretaste of eternal bliss, of perfect joy and happiness because it is during our darkest moments in life that we get a glimpse of Christ’s eternal light, when we are transformed and made stronger and better as persons soon enough to be worthy to enter the most exclusive circle of all – Paradise – to dwell in the Lord with His angels and Saints.
Let us pray for those going through many sufferings these days, including ourselves.
Lord Jesus Christ,
before all these pains and trials
came to my life,
You were there FIRST for me on the Cross;
You were there FIRST for me to suffer and die
on the Cross.
Let me stay with you on Your Cross
so I may enter Paradise with You,
right now,
right here.
Amen.
One of the most beautiful front page photos I have seen in many years. Taken in August 2021 when we were in the midst of a surge in COVID-19 cases, the photo evokes Paradise, “right here, right now” while people were suffering in Jesus, with Jesus and through Jesus. Photo from inquirer.net.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
The Seven Last Words, 01 April 2023
Photo by author, Chapel of the Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, Quezon City, 2014.
When they came to the place called the Skull, they crucified him and the criminals there, one on his right, the other on his left. Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”
Luke 23:33-34
Such is “the breadth, and length, and depth, and height of Christ’s love for us all” (Eph. 3:18-19) that right upon His crucifixion, Jesus begged God for our forgiveness. And that was not only for those who nailed Him on the cross on that Good Friday but also for us today who continue to crucify Him whenever we destroy our relationships.
In the Jewish thought, “to know” is not just of the mind but of the heart because to know is to have or enter into a relationship with others. Hence, Jesus begged first for our forgiveness when crucified because if there is something we must “know” above all is the fact that we are brothers and sisters in Him, one family in God our Father.
Every time there is a breakdown in our relationships, when we destroy our ties with one another, that is when we sin and know not what we do. And crucify Jesus anew.
We sin and know not what we do when we hurt those dearest to us – our mom and dad, sisters and brothers, relatives and friends – when we speak harsh words to them, calling them names, denigrating their persons as things.
We sin and know not what we do when we betray the trust of those with whom we promised to love forever, keep their secrets and protect them like your husband or wife, your children, your BFF, your student, your ward.
We sin and know not what we do when we lose hope in persons around us, choosing to do them evil because we thought they could no longer change for better, that they could never learn and overcome life’s pains and tragedies, that they could no longer get well from an illness or, sadly, because they are old and dying.
We sin and know not what we do when we cheat on those true to us, when we hide from those open to us, when we back stab those who believe and support us.
We sin and know not what we do when we abuse and use those people we are supposed to serve and protect, when we regard persons as objects to be possessed even if we do not know them personally.
Is there anyone whom you might have hurt in words or in deeds which you might not be aware of?
Who are the people who cause you pains and sufferings, who do not know what they are doing?
Let us pray:
Lord Jesus Christ,
I am sorry in crucifying You again,
when I know not what I am doing
like hurting the people You give and send me
to experience your love and mercy,
your trust and confidence
your kindness and fidelity;
I pray also for those who make me
suffer physically and emotionally,
those who do not know what they are doing;
help us build again
our many broken relationships;
make us humble and true;
let us believe in Your love
expressed by our family and friends
and by everyone who cares for us.
Amen.
Photo above is a sculpture called “Love” by Ukrainian artist Alexander Milov he created in 2015 showing two adults after a disagreement sitting with their back to each other while their inner child in both of them wanting to connect. A beautiful expression of how we are all interconnected and related as brothers and sisters. This Holy Week, let us mend and heal our broken relationships, let the inner child within us come out and simply say “I am sorry” or “I forgive you” and most especially, “I love you”. Photo from reddit.com. See also our blog, https://lordmychef.com/2023/01/14/the-human-child-mystery-of-gods-love/.
40 Shades of Lent by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday in the Fifth Week of Lent, 29 March 2023
Daniel 3:14-20, 91-92, 95 > +++ < John 8:31-42
Photo by author, sunrise at Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 22 March 2023.
Listening to your words today,
O God our Father,
prompted me to examine
my sins of omission;
they are the least easily
noticed of my sins
because they are what
I have failed to do.
Even if we confess it daily
at the start of the Mass,
I rarely recall my sins of omission.
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego answered King Nebuchadnezzar, “There is no need for us to defend ourselves before you in this matter. If God, whom we serve, can save us from the white-hot furnace and from your hands, O king, may he save us! But even if he will not, know, O king, that we will not serve your god or worship the golden statue that you set up.”
Daniel 3:16-17
Forgive me, O God,
in the many times I never
had the same courage of the
three young men in standing by
my faith in You,
in choosing to do what is right
and good even if it would mean
suffering and discomfort for me;
many times, it is during these
moments when I commit
my sins of omission:
when I become less
charitable with others
in my dealings with them,
when I fail to meet the
requirements of love
in exercising my different duties.
Forgive me, O God,
in the many times I
failed to stand up
for You,
for others,
for what is right
and just due to pressures
and worst,
out of personal favors
I get or simply,
when I am afraid
to do what is right.
In Jesus' name,
dear Father,
help me to be truthful,
to always seek and stand
by the truth so I may be
free from bondage to sin,
free from fears in order to be
free to know myself better
and most especially
to follow Jesus
by remaining
in his word.
Grant me the grace,
Lord, to discover sins
I am not aware of
so that I may have the grace
to know myself better
to serve you in others.
Amen.
40 Shades of Lent by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II Wednesday in the Fourth Week of Lent, 22 March 2023 Isaiah 49:8-15 >>> + <<< John 5:17-30
Photo by author, sunrise at the Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 22 March 2023.
Loving God our Father,
Your words say it all today,
my birthday:
Thus says the Lord: In a time of favor I answer you, in the day of salvation I help you; and I have kept you and given you as a covenant to the people… Can a mother forget her infant, be without tenderness for the child of her womb? Even should she forget, I will never forget you.
Isaiah 49:8, 15
The Lord is gracious and merciful.
Responsorial Psalm, Ps. 145:8
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC, 22 March 2023.
More than words, dear Father,
I praise and thank you
for your boundless love
and kindness to me all these
58 years!
You have always been present with me,
in me, for me, and through me in Jesus Your Son.
And so, I pray this to you:
Dearest Lord,
you have given me with so much,
I have given you so little;
teach me to give more
of my time and talents,
to give more of my self
so I can give Christ Jesus to others,
especially his love and mercy,
kindness and forgiveness;
empty me of my pride, Lord,
and fill me with your humility,
justice and love.
Amen.
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC, 22 March 2023.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 21 March 2023
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, 20 March 2023, Novaliches, QC.
Thank you for your birthday greetings. I have been on a silent retreat since Monday until Wednesday, my 58th birthday, at the Jesuits’ Sacred Heart Novitiate (SHN) in Quezon City. I usually go on retreats in June when my loads were lighter, when I feel so tired and exhausted, even burned out. Or when I have to make a major decision that I have to discern well.
For the first time, I went on this personal retreat not out of dire needs or even expediencies except that I miss God so much. This is the first time I went on a retreat without problems or issues to resolve. Most of all, without any complaints to God as I told my spiritual director, Fr. Danny Gozar, one of the Jesuits who facilitated our 30-Day Retreat in Cebu in 1995.
Sharing with you some of God’s consolations to me since Monday.
Photo by author, 20 March 2023, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC.
It was the feast of St. Joseph last Monday because March 19 fell on the Fourth Sunday in Lent. Right away, God consoled me upon arrival here when the daily Mass was starting. The priest, the Australian novice master of the Jesuits said in his homily that St. Joseph’s mission to give the name “Jesus” to the Child to be born by the Blessed Virgin Mary is also our first task in life which is to witness that “God saves” which is the meaning of the name “Jesus”.
That is when I realized the silence of St. Joseph which is not just being quiet by shutting out all the noise; silence is fulness, trying to listen and discern the sounds within, the sounds that speak of love and kindness, of mercy and forgiveness, of the voice of God also the softest and faintest, telling us to trust him alone and not be bothered with what would happen next.
To be silent like St. Joseph is ultimately to be silent like Jesus on the Cross, wholly trusting the Father, loving us until the end.
Photo by author, 20 March 2023, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC.
After lunch, I caught sight of the beautiful statue of Our Lady of Banneux (Our Lady of the Poor) at the side garden. It is one of my favorite prayer spots in this 23-hectare spirituality center in Quezon City. It was a nice spot to think of the many things I am thankful for since 2020 in preparation for my actual prayer blocks later that afternoon. And I had so many things to thank God since the pandemic started. First is the gift of life, that I have survived COVID-19!
The beauty of prayer is how it opens us to so many things about us we were totally unaware of like the gifts God has given us, the blessings he has showered us, the immense love he has for us. I discovered 20 things to be thankful for which I never thought I had and had never even thanked God for them!
That is the giftedness also of the Blessed Virgin Mary as she sang her Magnificat that while all generations shall call her blessed, she remains God’s lowly handmaid (Lk.1:48), remaining poor, an anawim who relies only in the Lord.
Being poor like Mary is being simple and empty for God. May we always be poor in need of God!
Photo by author, 20 March 2023, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC.
Fr. Danny directed me to just pray that afternoon until evening Psalm 139:1-18, asking for the specific grace of Mystery, of God himself. And God answered me! I felt his presence and generally, there was the feeling of joy within as I prayed before the Blessed Sacrament.
“You formed my inmost being; you knit me in my mother’s womb. I praise you, so wonderfully you made me; wonderful are your works! My very self you knew; my bones were not hidden from you, When I was being made in secret…
Psalm 139:13-15
God confirmed my earlier reflections, the things I am thankful to him since 2020.
God designed me personally, he had a purpose in creating me and creating me this way which for so long I have not totally appreciated and liked, wishing I were somebody else, or endowed with so many other talents I so admire in others.
God made each of us so specially, not mass-produced.
He made us so well, almost perfect to reflect his glory. And along this is the need to take care of ourselves.
How can I be a sign of God's glory and majesty even though I am sinner?
Photo by author, 20 March 2023, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC.
After supper, I felt longing for God that I went back to the chapel for another hour of prayer. I was a bit distracted, even restless at the start. Indeed, the most difficult prayer is always the most meritorious as I felt a deep intensity in the following passage:
Lord, you have probed me, you know me; you understand my thoughts from afar. My travels and my rest you mark; with all my ways you are familiar. Even before a word is on my tongue, Lord, you know it all.
Psalm 139:1, 2-4
God knows everything about us! There is no hiding from him. But, even if he knows us so well, he does not impose himself on us. Many times, God allows us to open up to him in our own time. Not just in his time. Like when we go astray, when we turn away from him in sins.
"you understand my thoughts from afar."
Even if I am far from God in sin, he still loves me, he still relates with me, understanding me. Waiting for me. Because he knows too that even if we sin, we still long for him. No one among us is happy being in sin. God knows that we know he is our life, that we cannot stay far from him for long.
"My travels and my rest you mark."
Where are you leading me, Lord? Sometimes I wonder if I am the one following God or is it God following me, watching over me that I always find my way back to him?
I have realized in almost 25 years being a priest, priesthood is more of a direction than a destination. From the school in Malolos to UST and UP for sometime then to Radio Veritas and nine years in a parish, now I am a chaplain in a big university with six campuses and two hospitals. Really, we were not prepared for this, especially myself! But, you are always there, God, leading me, always surprising me that even if you ask me to go anywhere else, I would go even if I have to learn a new language or whatever.
Here I found one thing I have always been remiss with – the need for me to rest in the Lord. To stop like this retreat not only when I have problems or overburdened.
At the end of my first day, my main realizations were -in Filipino as they dawned on me – were, first,
"Mahal na mahal ako ng Diyos.
Hindi lang basta mahal.
Kungdi mahal na mahal."
Secondly, as I prepared to sleep that night with all the lights out, I realized
"Mas nakakatakot maniwala sa Diyos
kesa sa multo kase
ang Diyos ay totoo,
ang multo ay hindi totoo!"
Thank you for your bearing with me. May God touch you, bless you, and heal you! Amen.
Photo by author, 20 March 2023, Sacred Heart Novitiate, QC.
40 Shades of Lent by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 19 March 2023
Monday, Solemnity of St. Joseph, Spouse of Blessed Virgin Mary
2 Samuel 7:4-5, 12-14, 16 + Romans 4:13, 16-18, 22 + Matthew 1:16, 18-21, 24
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 20 March 2023.
Praise and thanksgiving to you, God our Father
for the gift of calling me like St. Joseph
to bring your Son Jesus into the world
despite my many fears and doubts,
inadequacies, weaknesses
and sinfulness,
you entrusted me
with the same task you gave St. Joseph
of making known your Son
as “God Saves” - Jesus.
…the angel of the Lord appeared to him and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home… She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”
Matthew 1:20, 21
Remind me always, dear God,
of this first task you gave us
your beloved children
to make known to everyone
that Jesus came to die on the Cross
to show us “God saves” -
that we are so wrong to think
you are domineering and ruthless God,
that you are not a God hungry of power,
that you are not insistent, and demanding God,
most of all, you are not a God who competes
with us your mere creatures like everyone thinks
from Adam and Eve down to us today.
Photo by author, Chapel of Holy Family, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 2014.
Teach me to be silent,
trustful of you, O Father,
like St. Joseph not bothered at all
of how things would turn out
with my task to make people realize and
experience Jesus Christ;
give me the courage and obedience
of St. Joseph to do as you have
tasked me to witness this great mystery
and wonder of your love
because “God saves”.
Amen.
lordmychef.com 