Marriage is a prayer

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 11 June 2024

*From stillromancatholicafteralltheseyears.com*, *January 2022.*

What is very sad in this ongoing debate against divorce in our country is how some people claiming to be graduates and professors of Catholic institutions insist on their many “intellectual reasonings” why divorce should be allowed while at the same time declaring it is wrong to profess we are against divorce simply because we are Catholics.

What a tragedy when those educated or teaching in Catholic schools and universities who are supposed to know more and better about Jesus Christ and His teachings are the ones favoring divorce. They cite so many studies and authors even theologians to support their stand in favor of divorce without ever mentioning Christ’s teachings found in the Sacred Scriptures that were explained by the Church in our Catechism as well as in so many other documents by the Popes and bishops.

We understand how journalists could err regarding names and other details that essentially do not effect the veracity of their news like the recent sakalan blues in Gagalangin, Tondo when the interview of a priest was ascribed to another; but, to be one sided in the presentation of a story is something else like Rappler’s “The Problem with I am Catholic, I say no to divorce”. There’s a reliable maxim in journalism that says “Opinions are free but facts are sacred.”

*Photo by Joseph Kettaneh on Pexels.com*

The main fact we have been holding on the sanctity and indissolubility of marriage for over 2000 years is our Lord Jesus Christ’s teaching against divorce that the pro-divorce everywhere have refused to accept.

Yes, we need to listen to different views about divorce but not to those views condemned by the Church because they are wrong.

Divorce cannot be isolated as merely a political issue to be resolved because marriage as a natural sacrament is spiritual in nature, a path to holiness.

Marriage is a gift and a call from God for men and women to live and work together in order to attain eternal life. This we achieve firstly by having a prayer life, a relationship with God expressed in our love for one another especially between husband and wife.

In arguing against divorce, we need to look for those couples who have made it through thick and thin in their marriage in order to inspire others in following the path of Holy Matrimony.

*Joyce and Tony in 2019 with son Atty. JA and wife Kathleen with their two sons, and daughter Rosella.*

As a contribution in our fight against divorce, I share with you my homily at the 40th wedding anniversary of my cousin Joyce Pollard to Tony Lopez in October 2019 which I titled as “Married life is a prayer”.

Oh what a joy to officiate weddings especially of relatives and friends!

Hope you find some lessons and inspirations on the beauty of marriage we have to keep.

As I prepared my homily for your anniversary, Joyce and Tony… “the moment I woke up and before your Mommy Fely put on her make-up, I said a little prayer for you.”

Of course that is not the theme song of Joyce and Tony. They haven’t met yet in 1967 when Dione Warwick recorded I Say a Little Prayer. But they were already married when it became one of the tracks in the movie “My Best Friend’s Wedding” starring Julia Roberts.

And since this is my “best cousin’s wedding anniversary” in this part of the city, I have thought of reflecting on married life as a prayer.

In our gospel we have heard Jesus Christ narrating the parable of the unjust judge and persistent widow to underscore “the necessity to pray always without becoming weary” (Lk. 18:1).

Prayer is an expression of faith.

When there is faith, there is also love.

And when there is prayer, faith, and love, what we have is a relationship, a community of believers who love each other.

People who love and believe with each other always talk and communicate. They make time to be with one another. And most often, that is what really matters with people who love and believe – simply to be together.

Even in silence.

Like prayer.

Prayer is more than asking things from God but most of all, prayer is a relationship with God expressed with others. That is the beauty of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony: husband and wife are bound together in marriage to become signs of the saving presence of Jesus Christ.

Marriage as a sacrament means it is a prayer as well, a relationship of a man and woman with God as its source and foundation.

I am sure, Joyce and Tony along with all the other married couples here today will agree that married life requires a lot of prayers. In fact, married life is a prayer, a very difficult one that is much needed.

Like in that movie My Best Friend’s Wedding, there are real forces of evil that are trying to destroy couples. So many couples have already fallen, going their separate lives after several years of being together while on the other hand, more and more couples are refusing to get married at all due to this reality of breakups and separations.

And that is why we are celebrating today Joyce and Tony’s 40th wedding anniversary! We are praying with them in expressing our faith and love for them in Christ Jesus. Prayers have kept them together, transforming them into better persons.

At the end of the parable of the persistent widow and unjust judge, Jesus posed a very crucial question for us, especially to every married couple here today: When the Son of Man comes again at the end of time, will he find faith on earth? (Lk.18:8)

And what shall be our response?

“Yes, Lord, you shall find faith when you come again in Joyce and Tony!”

Like Moses in the first reading, they both prayed hard with arms outstretched on many occasions as they battled life’s many challenges and struggles.

“Yes, Lord, you shall find faith when you come again in Joyce and Tony” because they have both proclaimed your word with persistence, whether it is convenient or inconvenient like St. Paul in his second letter to Timothy. They have weathered so many storms in the past 40 years and your words, O Lord, have kept them together, sharing these with their children and with everyone in their life of fidelity and love.

“Yes, Lord, you shall find faith when you come again in Joyce and Tony” now before your altar to renew their vows to love and cherish each other for the rest of their lives!

“Yes, Lord, you shall find faith when you come again” among the many couples gathered here who have remained faithful to each other despite their many sins and failures, weaknesses and shortcomings.

Joyce and Tony, you are not only a prayer of faith but also a homily of the Holy Matrimony, showing us the light and power of Jesus Christ to transform people in prayer and bring them to fulfillment.

Prayer does not change things like typhoons and earthquakes. We cannot ask God in prayer to spare us from getting sick or be exempted from life’s many trials and sufferings. Prayer cannot stop those from happening.

What prayer does is change us, change our attitude so we may hurdle life’s many blows and obstacles. Especially with couples who always find God in their lives, in good times and in bad.

Prayers transform us into better persons as children of God, especially couples who eventually look like brothers and sisters after living together in faith, hope and love.

Tony and Joyce, I am sure everyone in our family and among your friends here can attest to the many good things that have transformed you in the past 40 years.

You have changed to become the best for each other.

In the bible, the number 40 means perfect.

May God continue to perfect you, Tony and Joyce.

Keep us too in your prayers as we pray for you. Amen.
https://lordmychef.com/2019/10/23/married-life-is-a-prayer/

*Joyce and Tony in 1979…may forever basta may prayer!*

Drought & blessedness

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday in Tenth Week of Ordinary Time, Year II, 10 June 2024
1 Kings 17:1-6 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Matthew 5:1-12

*Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 20 March 2024.*

Your words today, O Lord,
seem to be so apart,
unconnected, even disconsonant
to some respect:
in the first reading,
You declared a drought as
punishment against Israel
who turned their backs from You,
worshipping Baal;
in the gospel,
Jesus preached His Sermon
on the mount, declaring as 
"blessed" are those who are poor,
the meek, the hungry and thirsty,
the persecuted and insulted -
conditions and situations
directly contrary to the ways of the world,
so uncomfortable and difficult.

Every time we are facing
trials and difficulties in life,
we consider it as a drought,
a time when You, O God,
seem to be so far from us
when in fact, it is us who have gone
astray and away from You!

Let us see, dear Jesus,
your blessings
in every drought,
in every hardship,
in every poverty,
 and persecutions
we go through;
 let us realize the blessedness
of these moments of drought
and trials and difficulties
when we can examine what's
in our hearts,
who's in our hearts.

Many times we unconsciously
drift apart from You, O Lord,
when we are carried away by
our modern baals and gods
that separate us from You
and one another;
help us find our way
back to You,
rejoicing always in times of drought
to seek You and follow You.
Amen.

*Photo by Ms, Analyn Dela Torre, March 2024.*

Praying for tenderness of heart

Lord My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday, Solemnity of the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus-B, 07 June 2024
Hosea 11:1, 3-4, 8-9 ><}}}*> Ephesians 3:8-12, 14-19 ><}}}*> John 19:31-37

*Photo by PhotoMIX Company on Pexels.com*

Being tender and
caring are essentially your works,
O God, made known to us
by your Son Jesus Christ
in His Most Sacred Heart
where there is enough room
for each one of us
wounded and hurting to find healing;
bitter and disgusted to have rest
and solace; lost to find way back home.

Thus says the Lord: When Israel was a child I loved him, out of Egypt I called my son. Yet it was I who taught Ephraim to walk, who took them in my arms; I drew them with human cords, with bands of love; I fostered them like one who raises an infant to his cheeks; Yet. though I stooped to feed my child, they did not know that I was their healer.
Hosea 11:1, 3-4

I must admit, O God,
that I have not yet really known You
that until now, I lack your tenderness
and care for others;
to have tenderness like You, Lord,
is first of all for me to be intimate
with You, my Father,
my Life,
my Mission;
You have nurtured me as your son
but I never recognized You fully
that is why many times I followed
my doubts and negative thoughts
than You.
So many times I pray
yet still so far from You,
O God!

Lord Jesus Christ,
"dwell in my heart through faith
so that I may be rooted
and grounded in love"
(Ephesians 3:17)
because when my love with God
is superficial,
all my relationships are also skin-deep
that make me forget my love experiences,
giving more emphasis on others'
shortcomings, expectations,
and returns;
tenderness is being like You, O God,
 of having a big heart able to accommodate
 those suffering because You know and realize
 the gravity of what others are going through;
more than a feeling,
tenderness is love and mercy in action
because it is to feel what others
are going through.

Jesus,
meek and humble of heart,
make my heart like Thine,
close to the Father,
close to His children.
Amen.

Marriage as path to heaven, sign of the living God

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday, Memorial of St. Boniface, Bishop & Martyr, 05 June 2024
2 Timothy 1:1-3, 6-12 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Mark 12:18-27

Thank you so much,
dear Jesus for your words
today that shed light again
to this issue about divorce:
of how resurrection is real because
God is very much alive,
very much present with us
and in us!

Jesus said to them, “Are you not misled because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God? When they rise from the dead, they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but they are like the angels in heaven. As for the dead being raised, have you not read in the Book of Moses, in the passage about the bush, how God told him, I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? He is not God of the dead but of the living. You are greatly misled.
Mark 12:24-27

Most of all,
you have shown us too how 
marriage is a path towards heaven:
man and woman marry in this life
for a taste of heaven,
to work for heaven,
to try making this imperfect world
a heaven, your dwelling;
we pray for all couples
especially those going through
crises these days 
to heed St. Paul's words to
Timothy, "to stir into flame 
the gift of God" they have received
on their wedding day before
your altar:

For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self-control. So do not be ashamed of your testimony to our Lord, not to me, a prisoner for his sake; but bear your share of hardship for the Gospel with the strength that comes from God.
2 Timothy 1:7-8

Remind us that life
is always difficult
because there is always
the cross we have to carry;
however, let it sink into us too
that the cross is meant to make
us better and stronger,
that every sacrifice and
mortification we make is not to lose
life but actually to gain it more,
to have it more fully!
Most of all, every perseverance
to love and to forgive,
to be kind and be caring
happen all in your grace, O God;
in this age of instants
when every difficulty has become
a door to escape and exit from problems,
let us not be ashamed of the
real stuff that truly makes
life meaningful
by suffering and dying
in You, dear Jesus;
in this time of serious attacks
against marriage,
may we remember the words
of your servant St. Boniface
"Let us be neither dogs
that do not bark
nor silent onlookers
nor paid servants
who run away before the wolf.
Instead,
let us be careful shepherds
watching over Christ's
flock."

May we stand for what
is true and good,
O Lord,
not only in words but
especially in deeds,
 witnessing your Gospel.
Amen.

*Photo by author, Ubihan Island, Meycauyan City, December 2021.*

The key to grace & peace

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday, Memorial of St. Charles Lwanga & Companion Martyrs, 03 June 2024
2 Peter 1:2-7 ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> Mark 12:1-12

*Photo by author, Petra in Jordan, May 2019.*

Praise and glory to You,
God our loving Father!
What a grace from You 
to let us make halfway through 2024
that seemed to have only began
a few months ago!

For some of us, 
the past five months have been
so difficult and this sixth month
is a much needed welcome 
for rest and hoping 
for better things ahead;
for others, may June be
the start of finally fulfilling
those promises we have not kept
all these years
or projects we have not 
finished or have neglected;
please, Father, grant us the
grace and peace we have
always sought in life.

Beloved: May grace and peace be yours in abundance through knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord.
2 Peter 1:2

Help me realize in
Jesus Christ that great
truth I always forget,
that abundant grace and peace
come only from knowledge
of God which is first of all
a personal relationship
with You, O Lord;
so often like most people,
we pursue so much knowledge
of the world to make life
better but not necessarily
meaningful and fulfilling;
like those tenants at the vineyard,
in our too much knowledge, 
we have taken for ourselves
ownership of the world -
deciding on who is to live, who is to die, 
choosing or creating our own gender,
and worst, destroying the family 
with measures like divorce;
forgive us, God our Father,
in deleting You from the world,
insisting we decide on our fate
and future like those tenants who said 
to one another, "This is the heir.
Come, let us kill him,
and the inheritance will be ours"
(Mark 12:7).

Make us realize like
St. Charles Lwanga and his
over 100 companion martyrs
in Uganda
that knowledge of God 
is more of the heart
than of the head
or the emotions;
that knowledge of God
is doing what is true and good;
that knowledge of God 
is having personal relationship
with You in Jesus Christ
which leads to following
His Way to the Cross
of loving service to others.
Amen.

St. Charles Lwanga,
Pray for us.

Tenderness of God, sweetness of Mary

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday, Feast of the Visitation of the Blessed Virgin Mary, 31 May 2024
Romans 12:9-16 ><]]]]'> + >>]]]]'> + >>>]]]]'> Luke 1:39-56

*Photo by author, statues of Mary and Elizabeth at the Church of the Visitation in ein-Karem, the Holy Land, May 2017.*

What a lovely way to end the month with this feast of the Blessed Virgin Mary’s Visitation of her cousin Elizabeth after starting off May on its very first day with another feast, St. Joseph the Worker that remind us of God’s coming to us in Jesus Christ.

Visit and visitation may seem to be one and the same, sharing the common Latin root word of the verb vide, videre “to see” from which came the word video.

But, a visit is more casual and informal without intimacy at all. We say it so well in Filipino, napadaan lang or just passing by which is more concerned with the place or location and site, not the person there. Napadaan lang ako kaya dinalaw na rin kita (I was just passing by and decided to see you). There was really no intention in seeing the other person there.

*Photo by author, Church of the Visitation, Ein-Karem, Holy land, May 2017.*

Visitation is more intentional. Mr. Webster described it as a more formal visit commonly used in church language like when bishop and priests come to see their parishioners. This explains why we refer to a chapel as a visita which is actually a small church in remote places that missionaries used to visit for the sacraments. Likewise, visitas became venues too for catechism classes and other religious even social gatherings in places far from the town itself where the parish is usually situated too.

Thus, visitation connotes a deeper meaning because there is an expression or implication at least of care and concern among the people, a kind of love shared by the visitor like Mary to the one visited, Elizabeth.

Visitation is more of entering into someone’s life and personhood as reported by Luke in Mary’s visitation of Elizabeth when “Mary entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth” (Lk.1:40). There was a communion and sharing of their common experience of being blessed with the presence of God in their wombs.

Visitation is a sharing, a oneness in the joys and pains of those dear to us. The word becomes more meaningful when we examine its Filipino equivalent pagdalaw from the root word dala or something you bring like food or any gift when visiting relatives and friends. What you bring or dala is called pasalubong from the root salubong that literally means “meeting” or “encounter”. When the visitor and ones visited meet, they salubong.

Here it becomes more colorful and meaningful because more than the gifts we bring or dala in our visitations, we bring our very selves as a gift of presence. In every visitation, it is our very selves we gift, we share with those we visit, offering them our time and talent, joys and sadness and ears and heart to listen to their stories and absorb their woes and whatever they may have to unload upon us.

That was what Mary did exactly in her visitation of Elizabeth with an extra gift, the most precious pasalubong to share with everyone, Jesus Christ in her womb, right in her very self and body!

We too are invited every day to be like Mary, a bringer or taga-dala of Jesus Christ to everyone we meet, the best pasalubong we can share with everyone. If we can only be like Mary in our dealings with others, trying to make every encounter a visitation that is a willful bringing and sharing of Christ with others, then we also bring with us God’s tenderness and mercy for this dark world that admires toughness and roughness.

How sad are those news of daily road rages happening almost everywhere, many times resulting in the loss of lives like the recent fatal shooting of a family driver in Makati.

Through the Blessed Mother’s humility and obedience before God, Christ came into the world to make us experience the Father’s tenderness in the many healings and miracles He performed. This tenderness of God in Jesus we saw too in Mary His Mother in the Visitation: Mary visited Elizabeth because she knew and felt her many wounds who for a long time bore no child, living in “disgrace before others” as she had claimed (Lk.1:25). A tender person like Jesus and Mary is one who comes to comfort and heal the wounds of those hurt in life, trying to lullaby the restless and sleepless, never adding insult to injuries.

One last thing about the Visitation of Mary to her cousin Elizabeth. One of the best things we can experience from visitations and visits of family and friends like during wakes and funerals is that quality of sweetness.

Sweetness always goes with tenderness. It is the essence of God who is love. Anyone who loves is always sweet that always comes naturally from within, bringing out good vibes. It is never artificial like Splenda, always flowing freely and naturally that leaves a good taste and feeling to anyone.

In the Hail Holy Queen, Mary is portrayed as “O clement, O sweet Virgin Mary” to show her sweetness as a Mother. Recently I have seen some posts making a meme (?) of the Hail Holy Queen’s part that says “to you do we cry poor banished children of Eve”. I have not really dealt it with much attention because too often, there are a lot of generation gaps in many posts in social media; I really cannot relate much to the young perhaps due to my age. I just hope that post on the Hail Holy Queen is not derogatory. Back to our reflection…

Tenderness and sweetness are the most God-like qualities we all have but have unconsciously buried deep in our innermost selves, refusing them to surface because of our refusal to love for fears of getting hurt and left behind or lost. When Mary heard Elizabeth’s pregnancy, she simply followed her human and motherly instincts that in fact so Godly that she went in haste to hill country of Judah. How lovely!

Tomorrow it is already June, reminding us all we are halfway through the year. And it would be surprisingly quick that soon, it is already Christmas again! This feast of the Visitation reminds us of Mary’s great role in making Christmas a reality when God almighty became human, little and vulnerable like us to experience His sweetness and tenderness in Jesus Christ. Through Mary.

Let us pray:

God our loving Father,
thank for coming to us,
for staying with us,
not just visiting us;
help us imitate Your Son
Jesus Christ's Mother,
the Blessed Virgin Mary
whose "love is so sincere",
loving one another like Elizabeth
with "mutual affection,
showing honor,
fervent in spirit,
serving the Lord;
help us imitate Mary
to always rejoice in hope,
endure afflictions and
most of all, persevere in prayer"
(cf. Romans 12:9-12)
so we may always bring 
Jesus Christ with everyone
we meet.
Amen.

*From cbcpnews.net, 13 May 2022, at the Parish of the National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City.*

Becoming a Bartimaeus

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday in the Eighth Week of Ordinary Time, Year II, 30 May 2024
1 Peter 2:2-5, 9-12 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Mark 10:46-52

Teach us, Jesus,
to be like Bartimaeus;
let us admit our blindness
to what true and good and beautiful
that is YOU;
teach us to be like
Bartimaeus to cry out to
You, Jesus, 
to wait for You always, 
to believe in You as the Only One
who can heal us of our blindness;
most of all,
teach us, Lord,
to leave the side of the streets,
to come to You, Jesus
to the middle of the road
to follow You on the way to
the Cross!

He threw his cloak, sprang up, and came to Jesus.
Mark 10:50

Forgive us, dear Jesus
for being so afraid,
to confront head on
the many ongoing
debates and attacks
against Your teachings
we hold so dearly
like the value of every person,
the inviolability of human life,
the sanctity of marriage;
forgive us, Jesus
when we hide in being "open"
choosing to be silent
just to accommodate the few
noisy people advocating for
too much rights without any
responsibilities,
speaking about equality
without any regard at all for
God and religion,
spirituality and theology.

Let us be like Bartimaeus
shouting louder than ever
amid calls of some to be silent,
to not insist Your teachings on others
when it is indeed the only one
true and just;
let us be like Bartimaeus
by affirming who we are -
"a chosen race,
a royal priesthood,
a holy nation,
a people of his own,
so that we may announce
Your praises who called us out
of darkness into his wonderful
light"
(1 Peter 2:9).

Have pity on us,
Jesus,
we want to see You
and follow You.
Amen.

What we value most

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday, Memorial of St. Paul VI, Pope, 29 May 2024
1 Peter 1:18-25 ><}}}}"> + ><}}}}"> + ><}}}}"> Mark 10:32-45

What a lovely Wednesday
we have, God our loving Father
right in the middle of so many 
issues that make us examine our
heart and soul,
what we truly value in this life
as Peter reminds us of how much
You value us so much as a people,
every individual person:

Beloved: Realize that you were ransomed from your futile conduct, handed on by your ancestors, not with perishable things like silver or gold but with the precious Blood of Christ as of a spotless unblemished lamb… You have been born anew, not from perishable but from imperishable seed, through the living and abiding word of God.
1 Peter 1:18-19, 23

Through Your Son
Jesus Christ our Lord,
help us realize dear Father 
these truths and realities 
of Your immense love 
for each one of us
while we waste
and take for granted
the value of human life
especially at its most vulnerable 
stages of infancy and old age
as well as the sanctity of marriage;
enlighten our minds and our hearts,
especially those of our lawmakers
and policy makers,
most of all, 
the masses who are misled by
so many into believing in the need
for contraceptives and abortions,
and divorce.

Forgive us, dear Jesus
for the "hardness of our hearts"
in insisting our own 
rules and laws,
blinded by glory of power
and wealth like the brothers
James and John;
let us heed your call that
"whoever wishes to be great
among you will be your servant"
(Mark 10:43).

In this great period in our history
as a Christian nation when some people
claiming to know more,
claiming to know better
totally disregard facts
and true wisdom from the Spirit
in advocating divorce and other
agenda promoting the "culture of death",
grant us O Lord Jesus Christ
the courage You gave St. Paul VI
to go against the tide by standing firm
on Your truth in upholding human life
by choosing the minority report
"Humane vitae":
St. Paul VI did not mind at all
being maligned and persecuted
even within the Church
for he believed firmly at how You,
O God value every person;
how beautiful that in the end,
You proved him right
when You allowed
St. Paul VI to intercede twice
in the miraculous birth of two babies
recommended by doctors for abortion
due to difficult pregnancy and disability
that eventually paved the way for his
beatification and canonization.

Like St. Paul VI,
let us be rooted in You, O God
as we "dialogue with the modern world"
by leading people to You
in order to find fulfillment
and meaning in life
in the name of Christ.
Amen.

St. Paul VI,
Pray for us!

*Pope Paul VI is seen in this portrait made in early 1969 (CNS photo) via wikipedia.org.*

Pentecost, death & “re-membering”

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 22 May 2024

I have reflected last Sunday that Pentecost is not just an event in the past but a daily coming of the Holy Spirit upon us, enlightening us of so many things in life we used to take for granted. Like the value of every person, especially when there is a death of a loved one.

In fact, death is a Pentecost when the Holy Spirit comes to remind us that we never – and can never – replace our departed loved ones. Every person is irreplaceable, especially family members. The sooner we realize this, the better for us to avoid those guilty feelings later that we should have been more loving and kind, that we should have said “I love you” more often because we never know for how long we can be with our loved ones. One thing is for sure: we do not replace our deceased loved ones but simply re-member them.

Photo by author, *Bgy. Kaysuyo, Alfonso, Cavite, 27 April 2024.*

The word “remember” is very interesting.

It is from the root word “member” or “part”. When we put the prefix “re” which means “again”, “remember” means to make a part again of the present moment.

Every time we remember a person or an event, we make them part of our present moment. And they are most real, most present when our re-membering happens in the context of a family or a community. Re-membering someone by one’s self surely does happen a lot but very often, it is more of looking back to the past, recalling the days we used to be together. But when we remember somebody as a family or a community, the one we remember is indeed re-membered in our present, becomes real in everyone around celebrating his/her memory. Something concrete happens and the joy is more intense, leading to freedom from past, from pains and hurts of losing a loved one.

That is when death becomes a Pentecost. When the Holy Spirit came down upon the Apostles and the Blessed Virgin Mary in Jerusalem 50 days after Easter, the Third Person of the Blessed Trinity did not come to replace Jesus. The Holy Spirit is a distinct Person of the Trinity in whose power all the followers and believers of Christ have been empowered to make Him present until now in our collective re-membering of Him in the Church and the Sacraments. In the Holy Spirit who comes to us daily, we overcome and transcend every death we go through in life, enabling us to re-member our departed loved ones by being a member of those left behind.

*Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 18 March 2024.*

Since mommy’s death, I have gone home thrice already. How I loved to walk inside her room, trying so hard to get those feelings or vibes when she was still alive I miserably miss most as the days moved on.

One thing I have noticed, though, is that strange feeling of our home suddenly so empty as in “kakalog-kalog” as we say in Tagalog. Mommy ko lang nawala sa amin pero parang nawala ang lahat sa bahay?

Now I know better why the mother is the light of the family or “ilaw ng tahanan” because after she had died, her light in our home was turned off that seemed to have made our home so dark, so light and hollowed. However, when we gathered as siblings together with our nieces and nephew and relatives, the warmth of our home returns as if mommy is with us , still with us.

That is when the Holy Spirit comes amid the darkness of every death. A Pentecost when we are reminded of those still with us who must band closer together to make our departed more present in our collective re-membering. No wonder, it was also the final instruction of Jesus to His disciples at their Last Supper when He told them as He gave them the chalice to “Do this in memory of me” or “in remembrance of me”. In Greek, it is called anamnesis which is more than remembering or recalling but making present, making a reality.

And the reality is this – every person is valuable beyond measure.

So fragile too! Because we can easily lose them in a snap.

We realize and feel this most true in death when we experience deeply “someone like me” whom I love, whom I care for is gone because in every death of a beloved, a part of us dies too. Even if he/she is an enemy or somebody we are not in good terms with, we feel a loss within because for better or worst, the deceased made us feel our humanity.

It is said that “one life is too many.” Very true. Today God gives us the gift and power to re-member those not with us by connecting with those still living with us. Make that connection now and soon you too shall see the face we sorely miss together. Have a blessed remaining half-week!

We are a “puff of smoke”

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday, Memorial of St. Rita de Cascia, Religious, 22 May 2024
James 4:13-17 ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> + ><]]]]'> Mark 9:38-40

"you have no idea
what your life will be like
tomorrow. 
You are a puff of smoke
that appears briefly
and then disappears" 
(James 4:14).

St. James' imagery
of our lives
and of our very selves
are so light as the
puff of a smoke
but so heavy in meaning
for it is true indeed
we are nothing in this world
without God;
it is only in God
we have worth
and meaning.

Forgive us,
dear Jesus
when we are arrogant,
proud and boastful,
when we live so far from You,
detached from You,
living on our "own"
as if we have control
of everything;
forgive us,
dear Jesus
when we are like John
who tried to prevent
someone driving out demons
in Your name simply because
he was not one of us;
forgive us,
dear Jesus
whenever we think we
have an edge over others
simply because they are
not with us in the Church
or just because they are
different in their approach
and style.

Like St. Rita of Cascia
to whom You did so many
wondrous things,
help us to rely solely in
You, Jesus;
that nothing is too late
nor too early
with Your grace
for as long as we rely
on You.
Not in us.
Amen.