Ageing gracefully

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 15 January 2026
Photo by Ar. Philip Santiago, Basilica of the Annunciation, Israel, October 2025.

Two priests and a former nun personally known to me died in our diocese last Sunday. It was also the birthdate of the late Bishop Cirilo Almario, Jr. whom I had remembered in my two early morning Masses on that Sunday, January 11, 2026.

In those two Masses too I mentioned in my homily the retreat I facilitated first week of January with my friends about “ageing gracefully” – my own realizations since joining their ranks as senior citizens last March.

Let me elaborate those two points I have shared with them and in my homily last Sunday.

From forbes.com.

First, let us embrace our being old. Stop saying “when we get old”, pagtanda natin because we are already old. Period. Matanda na tayo.

We cannot reverse our ageing process and it is useless to have all these cosmetic manipulations like dyeing our hair black or stretching our sagging skin and removing those wrinkles.

Embrace old age. It is beautiful and wonderful because it is so good. Our Filipino word for “old” says it all – matanda – which ironically so many women hate to hear as they stress that kalabaw lang ang tumatanda. That is not true.

Our word matanda is from the root word tanda which means “sign” that is why an old person is rightly called matanda because he/she is a sign of God’s goodness, a sign of God’s mercy and love, a sign of God’s beauty and majesty.

Moreover, a matanda is a sign of wisdom and grace that is why when we were young boys, we wanted to be old by putting our dad’s eyeglasses or taste his cigarettes and beer while girls put on their mom’s make up and high heeled shoes. How funny that when we are already old, we resist to accept the fact that we strive to look young again, sometimes ending up as nagmumurang kamatis.

Photo by Mr. Jim Marpa, 2019.

Technically speaking, “old” is actually harsh. Old is something about a past phase that has ran its course like being outdated. Luma in Filipino that connotes stale, passe, lacking relevance and sadly, useless. Just for display purposes. As a person, that is the one we refer to as walang pinagkatandaan. Or huklubang matanda.

To be more specific, the better English term referring to ageing gracefully is ancient that exudes with a sense of timeliness, of being perpetually relevant like the ancient ruins in Rome, Athens, and Jerusalem. Actually, some biblical experts have wanted to rename the “Old Testament” as “Ancient Testament” following this line of thinking.

Photo by author, Ephesus, Turkiye, November 2025.

Things and even persons can rightly be referred to as ancient because of their beauty still intact that inspires us and makes us wonder about life itself. They are not just old sites nor old persons that remind us of the past long gone but ancient because still lovely, “still full of sap and green” as the psalmist extolled the seniors of his time.

Persons who age gracefully like ancient sites stir our inner selves with deeper beauty and realities of life that eyes cannot see. That is perhaps the reason these days many senior men and women are so “in” and considered as attractive.

It is the same wisdom realized by St. Augustine when he wrote about God, “Late have I loved you, O Beauty ever ancient, ever new, late have I loved you. You were within me, but I was outside, and it was there that I searched for you.”

Being ancient -whether as a person or a thing – is something of the inside we must turn to not outside like our skin and physical body. From that inside realization and acceptance of being senior or elderly we experience the grace of ageing because we experience God still present in us, in fact loving us more as he makes as a sign or tanda of his loving presence.

Ageing gracefully is a modern virtue we need to cultivate in this age of instants that glorify youthfulness equated with usefulness. That is why when Pope Benedict XVI resigned from the Papacy in 2013, the more I have come to love and admire him. In his resignation, he taught us the importance of embracing and lovingly accepting our old age when we can no longer adequately perform our many tasks in office even in life itself. It was not a failure nor a surrender in the negative sense but more of a deep courage and trust in God that we accept our being weak and ready to come to him soon.

Photo by author, Pundaquit, San Antonio, Zambales, May 2025.

This brings me to my second realization since turning sigisty years old last year: corollary to embracing old age is accepting death. That is why, as seniors, let us stop saying and thinking of our coming death because we are already dying. Huwag na nating isipin yung “kapag namatay ako” dahil namamatay na nga tayo.

Being senior is doing away with those bucket lists, of thinking about things to do, places to visit before we die. We are already dying and hence, whatever you can do, do it now. There could be no more tomorrow. All we have is the present moment. Anything could happen to us, for better and for worse.

Ageing gracefully is coming to terms with life which leads us to coming to terms with death. Yes, this is easier said than done, but slowly, I am learning and loving it!

Photo by author, Bucharest, Romania, November 2025.

One of the reasons that made me decide to become a priest in the early 1990’s was the conviction that I have felt so deeply God’s love for me as a person in the many experiences I have gone through in life. I felt at that time that by becoming a priest, I could convince more people about the truth and existence of this loving God we have.

I still hold on to that but a year after turning sigisty, becoming sigisty-one in March 22, another fascinating realization I have had is how wonderful this life is. Now that I am old, the more I can boldly claim with conviction that it is good to be alive. Masarap pa rin ang mabuhay! Maganda ang buhay maski mahirap!

Accepting and embracing our ageing, our getting weak, our failing memory are all kinds of dying. And in that midst that we actually live fullest and meaningfully. I don’t know if I can write any further because I ain’t dead yet but… just in case, it was worth the trip. Amen. May you have a fruitful and fulfilling weekend ahead.

What impresses Jesus?

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 11 September 2025
Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 2023.

Of course, there is no need for us to impress Jesus Christ for he loves us so immensely beyond measure. However, I have realized this week in my prayers that the Lord is most impressed with us when we are in our weakest.

It has been recurring in my prayers several times with the latest in this Wednesday’s gospel, “Raising his eyes toward his disciples Jesus said: ‘Blessed are you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours’” (Luke 6:20).

I just love that scene of Jesus looking up to his disciples, looking up to us because normally we humans are the ones who look up to God his Father where he is seated to his right in heaven. When we pray, we sometimes raise our hands reaching up to God.

There is something so beautiful and wonderful when the Sacred Scriptures tell us of Jesus looking up to us. What an honor and a privilege! Because that happens when we are weakest, most flawed, and dirty with sin.

Imagine being there at that scene of the sermon on the plain and Jesus had to raise his eyes toward his disciples: he must have been at a lower position than them. This scene will have its fullness in the washing of the disciples’ feet after their Last Supper on Holy Thursday.

We who could no longer bow that low to clean and wash our feet as well as trim our toenails know this so well. Imagine all the dirt and flaws Jesus must have seen in the disciples’ feet that evening. Not a word was heard from Jesus. He teased no one nor complained of the dirt and unsightly things he must have seen too. Jesus simply bore everything because he loved them so much.

Photo from Our Lady of Fatima University website, June 2025.

Jesus continues to look up to us every time we receive him in our hands during the Holy Communion. That is why I always tell the people especially our students to be very solemn during that occasion when the Son of God most powerful, all-knowing in his simplest form and sign as a thin wafer, enters us body and blood. It is the most perfect time to pray to Jesus, to tell him everything and most of all, to listen to him because that is when he is right inside our body, when he is down inside us, we above him.

Jesus does not need our triumphs and “goodness” because they all came from him actually. What he does not have is what we have a lot- the negative things like sins, hurts and bitterness, anger and resentment festering deep inside us for a long time. Those are the thing Jesus want from us, the very things he is most “impressed” with us that we are able to live with those burdens for so long. But, he is most impressed with us in the truest sense when we are able to surrender these to him because that’s when we are blessed and filled in him.

Raising his eyes toward his disciples Jesus said: “Blessed are you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours. Blessed are you who are now hungry, for you will be satisfied. Blessed are you who are now weeping, for you will laugh. Blessed are you when people hate you, and when they exclude and insult you, and denounce your name as evil on account of the Son of Man” (Luke 6:20-22).

Photo by author, Sacred Heart Novitiate, Novaliches, QC, 2023.

In this age of affluence brought about by technological advances, being poor and hungry, being maligned and weeping are things to be avoided at all costs. With people so fascinated with money and wealth, fame and power, being poor and hungry for God, weeping and being maligned for what is true and good and just are not impressive at all, even foolish.

But, look at the effect of those shameless social media posts by “nepo babies” of their crass lifestyle sustained by ill-gotten wealth at the expense of the poor – they have all been bashed relentlessly in the country leading to more evidence of corruption among government officials and law-makers while in Indonesia and Nepal, these same practices have sparked social unrest and upheavals recently!

For so long, many have wished to be rich and wealthy, to have all the money to buy good food and drinks, build mansions filled with expensive cars and adorn themselves with signature clothes and jewelries in the belief they can impress others. Maybe with their fellows with the same benighted souls but more often, they only bred jealousies and envies that led to vicious circles of corruption and crimes in the name of having more money.

In truth, no one is impressed with material things because people who feel good only with possessions are actually the most pitiable ones for they could not see their own value as a person. To be able to see one’s value as a person despite one’s sins and weaknesses is the beginning of being truly human.

Recall the Lord’s parable of the Pharisee and the publican praying at the temple: the publican who stayed at the back beating his chest so contrite for his sins went home blessed according to Jesus than the Pharisee who boasted of his own righteousness. “Magpakatotoo ka!” screamed a soda commercial not too long ago but still echoes so true these days.

Jesus is not impressed with what we have done nor achieved but with what we have become – that amid all the beatings and pains of life with all of our shortcomings and sins, we forge on with life, persevering in faith, filled with hope that Christ is our salvation. What impresses Jesus Christ most in us is what we lack because that is when he can be closest to us, one in us. See yourself the way Jesus sees you – as a person, loved and cared for. Regardless of what. Let me end this with a prayer wrapped in a song which I have always loved because it sounds like Jesus speaking to me, so impressed with me despite of everything.

From YouTube.com

Facing life’s realities

Lord My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul, 21 July 2025
Monday in the Sixteenth Week of Ordinary Time, Year I
Exodus 14:5-18 <*((((>< + ><))))*> Matthew 12:38-42
Photo by author, Cabo da Roca, Pundaquit, San Antonio, Zambales, 15 May 2025.
It is a rainy, 
gloomy Monday,
God our Father;
like your people who have
left Egypt led by Moses,
suddenly we are again facing
life's realities of work and
struggles,
of health and sickness,
of challenges and problems
bigger than us.

Pharaoh was already near when the children of Israel looked up and saw that the Egyptians were on the march in pursuit of them. In great fright they cried out to the Lord. And they complained to Moses, “Were there no burial places in Egypt that you had to bring us out here to die in the desert? Why did you do this to us? Why did you bring us out of Egypt? Did we not tell you this in Egypt, when we said, ‘Leave us alone. Let us serve the Egyptians? Far better for us to be the slaves of Egyptians than to die in the desert.'” But Moses answered, “Fear not! Stand your ground, and you will see the victory the Lord will win for you today… The Lord himself will fight for you; you have only to keep still” (Exodus 14:10-14).

Keep me still, Lord;
let me stand my ground
in you before my adversaries -
primarily my self when I doubt
you, when I lose hope,
when I am disillusioned,
when I am afraid,
when I complain a lot
when the realities of life
start to kick in
making me realize of your invitation
and calls for me to welcome you
into my life,
to believe you,
to trust you.
O dear Jesus,
many times in the wilderness
of this life I waste precious
time and efforts like the Pharisees
asking you for signs
when each day,
each waking from sleep
is like me being a Jonah
coming out alive
from the belly of the whale;
help me live
your paschal mystery,
Jesus,
one day at a time.
Amen.

Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Our Lady of Fatima University
Valenzuela City