What’s inside you?

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Tuesday, Misa De Gallo IV, 19 December 2023
Judges 13:2-7, 24-25 <'[[[[>< + ><]]]]'> Luke 1:5-25

Here’s another beautiful story I got from a blogger I recently followed from Spain at wordpress.com. It is actually an analogy which may sound simple but very true.

You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. 
Why did you spill the coffee?

"Because someone bumped into me!!!"
 
Wrong answer. You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea. Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.

Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you - which surely happens all the time - whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled. So, we have to ask ourselves, "what's in my cup?" When life gets tough, what spills over from me? 

(see, https://pkmundo.com/2023/12/17/i-love-this-analogy/comment-page-1/#respond)

*Photo by Mr. Boy Cabrido, Quiapo Church, Misa de Gallo, 17 December 2023.*

My dear friends, we are now on the fourth day of our Misa de Gallo and I find that story/analogy so appropriate with our readings today.

How interesting that Zechariah with his wife Elizabeth – according to St. Luke – prayed so hard all their lives to have a child but when God was about to fulfill it, Zechariah doubted it despite being told by an angel from God. Like in that story/analogy we presented above, Zechariah was “rattled” by the angel’s good news. “What was inside Zechariah that he doubted the good news”?

Then Zechariah said to the angel, “How shall I know this? For I am an old man, and my wife is advanced in years.” And the angel said to him in reply, “I am Gabriel, who stand before God. I was sent to speak to you and to announce to you this good news. But now you will be speechless and unable to talk until the days these things take place, because you did not believe my words, which will be fulfilled at their proper time.”
Luke 1:18-20

*Photo by author, Wailing Wall of Jerusalem, May 2017, the section of the remaining parts of the temple closest to the Holy of Holies where priests used to incense once a year.*

Advent is the presence of God but sometimes when we are overburdened with so many things like anxieties and problems in life, frustrations and disappointments, sickness and death in the family, we become unaware of his divine presence even if we continue to pray and do our religious duties and devotions. Too often we lack the conscious awareness of God in our lives that we take him for granted, considering him more as a given than a presence and a reality.

This is exactly what we told you yesterday about some of us pretending to be real disciples of Christ when in reality we are merely dreaming in a sleepwalking existence. It is a kind of spiritual immaturity due to our lack of honesty and sincerity with one’s self and with God that we remain a spiritual dwarf. Like Zechariah who happened to be a priest who must be more attuned and rooted in God, we too hardly notice God’s coming or even doubt him and his powers because we want to hold on to our comfort zone or insist our own agenda.

God is never put off by our queries in life but what “irritates” him is when we question him, when we doubt him, when we ask about his character like Zechariah. That is a lack of faith in God, a lack of trust, and lack of personal relationship with him unlike St. Joseph in our reflection yesterday, truly a righteous man.

Contrast Zechariah with his wife Elizabeth who is presented by St. Luke in a better position despite her being barren. In the Bible, barrenness is a sign of lifelessness and absence of God’s blessings. Worst, it was seen as a punishment from God for one’s sins.

Yet in this opening scene of St. Luke’s infancy story beginning with the annunciation of John’s birth, we find God’s power at its fullest when we are most emptied which is exactly the imagery of Elizabeth being barren and old. She had nothing at all to be proud of unlike Zechariah who still had duties to perform as a priest.

As we have reflected yesterday too, we burst in great rejoicing actually in those moments filled with negativities, with a lot of “no” answers of rejections and failure. That was how Elizabeth felt after being pregnant with John.

After this time, his wife Elizabeth conceived, and she went into seclusion for five months, saying, “So has the Lord done for me at a time when he has seen fit to take away my disgrace before others.”
Luke 1:24-25

Earlier, we asked what was inside Zechariah that he doubted the good news of the angel; now, we imagine what was inside the barren Elizabeth who welcomed the good news rejoicing by voluntarily going into a seclusion?

The story of the elderly couple Zechariah and Elizabeth finally being blessed by God with a child shows us God’s consistency not only in keeping his promises but most of all in working best even in our worst conditions, in the most unusual circumstances. In these two stories, one from the Old Testament and in the New Testament, we find the importance of being filled with God always.

Recall our story/analogy above. What is inside us that comes out when we are shaken? What spills over from our cup, is it joy, gratitude, and peace? Or, anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions long festering within?

In starting his Christmas story with the annunciation of the birth of John the Baptist, St. Luke is telling us an important aspect in celebrating this blessed season – the need to fill ourselves with God.

See how Zechariah was forced to be silent and made mute so that he could spend more time listening and rediscovering God anew in his heart, of filling himself with God. On the other hand, Elizabeth opted to go into seclusion also to contemplate God already dwelling in her though she may have never known before that is why she wanted to listen more intently to his other plans with the gift of John. Similarly like her in the first reading was the wife of Manoah who remained silent and open when a man of God told her she would bear a son to be called Samson, saying that “I did not ask him where he came from” (Jgs.3: 6). Advent invites us to simply be still to be filled by God, with God.

The other day I joined my nieces and nephew for lunch. After dropping me off at the parish, they asked for a nearby Starbuck’s because my nephew had to buy a coffee mug for his exchange gift in their class. When I asked him why he had to give a Starbuck’s mug as gift, it turned out that is now the way it is in class Christmas party – your exchange gift partner can make a wish for the gift to receive for as long as it is within the agreed budget by the class.

Anyway, our life gives us the cup or the mug. We make the decision, the choice to fill it with coffee or chocolate or tea, in the same manner we fill ourselves with joy or bitterness, anger or serenity, gratitude or complaints. Or God.

Like Zechariah in the gospel today, we could be so tired already of doing so much, of banging our heads on the wall to solve everything, to answer everything. In this final stretch before Christmas, let us empty our cups or mugs of our selves and fill it with God who alone can truly fill us with life despite our dryness and barrenness. Amen. Have a blessed Tuesday!

Giving permission to die

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 08 November 2023

*Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, 06 November 2023.*

A very dear friend died last October 16 after more than three years of fighting cancer. She used to be one of our elementary teachers at the school I was first assigned after ordination. She later resigned to teach abroad but every year whenever she was home for summer vacation, she always invited me to join their mini-reunions of former co-teachers.

Everything changed in 2020 when she had to retire early to return home for her cancer treatment. We could not visit her during the pandemic lockdown, occasionally meeting her via zoom and video phone calls. When COVID subsided a little in late 2021 and early 2022, we finally met briefly. She seemed to be responding well to her chemotherapy except that she had lost hair that was natural. Last December, we were finally able to go out with other fellow co-teachers twice after Christmas and after New Year’s day last January. We were so glad she had regained weight and strength. And hair too!

Saw her again last June but in late August, she stopped answering our messages. It turned out that her cancer had metastasized to her lungs and liver. When I came to see her October 7, the first thing she told me was for me to “allow her to die”. According to her brothers and elder sister, she had also asked them for “permission to die” earlier that night because she said, she was already tired and was ready to go back to God.

It was not the first time somebody had asked me a “permission to die”, especially since I have become a hospital chaplain two years ago. But, I must confess, in all instances, there was always hesitancy on my part in giving “permission to die” especially when those dying are close to me like friends and relatives. In fact, the first person who asked me “permission to die” was my best friend from high school seminary. I just cried, said nothing when he calmly told me he was ready to go.

That scene remains vivid to my memory to this day, including the many lessons he had taught about life and dying.

By the way, let me put it clear that what we are referring here as giving “permission to die” is allowing death take its natural course, not mercy killing or euthanasia which is intrinsically evil we should never allow.

In my 25 years in the priesthood, two years as hospital chaplain since 2021, I have always felt the process of dying as a “grace-filled moment” too like in the birth of an infant or recovery of a sick person. Both the dying and their family and friends are blessed when death approaches or had come, like when Jesus visited Martha and Mary four days after the death of their brother Lazarus. That scene of Jesus speaking to Martha before bringing Lazarus back to life assures us of how God had turned death into a blessing in Christ: Jesus told her, “I am the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in me, even if he dies, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (Jn. 11:25-26)

If we believe Jesus and his words to Martha, we too shall find him coming to us when a beloved is dying, especially when they ask us that “permission to die” which is not actually a permission per se because only God decides when we are going to die.

When patients ask for “permission to die”, they are actually bidding us goodbye. Dying people always knew when they had to go because they have already accepted the reality. This is very noticeable at the serenity, even of joy, on their face. Despite their sickness, dying patients who have truly made peace with God and had given up everything to Him always have that grace of composure like Jesus when he died on the Cross, crying his same prayer, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit” (Lk.23:46).

*Photo by author, National Shrine of Our Lady of Fatima, Valenzuela City, September 2021.*

Giving “permission to die” is a grace from God He gives to relatives and friends to accept and embrace that difficult reality.

“Permitting” our loved ones to die is to assure them of our love and forgiveness of their sins against us. It is our final act of love for them when we assist them to that great passageway onto eternity like when we would lead our guests out to the door to ensure them our separation is just temporary until we meet again soon.

Due to this great amount of love in our final goodbyes, some people sometimes “fake” their dying moments, creating a “drama” in asking “permission to die” when actually, they are not yet ready to die but merely demanding love and care from family and friends. One clear sign is they tend to be more cerebral than cordial, becoming bitter and angry than ever. Even amid sufferings, they think more of themselves than feel others around them. Like the boy who cried wolf, they have not yet really seen death approaching because most likely, they have not yet faced life and living truly. Coming to terms with death is coming to terms with life. When loved ones “fake” their dying, what they really seek is how to live fully and responsibly, to be their true self. But that’s a different topic…

*Photo by author, Malagos Orchid Farm, Davao City, 2017.*

Death is the most terrifying moment in life because we do not know what’s next, where we are going. That is why, when people truly mean that they have accepted death, that is also when they have accepted life in its fullness. They do not reason out. They just feel God and those around them. Most of all, they have peace within amid pains.

The same thing happens with us relatives and friends of the dying. We feel their sense of peace within, affecting us, infecting us. Hence, we get lost at how to express our giving them of that permission to die. Very often, we cry because our hearts overflow with love. When we feel their seeking of permission to die is genuine, our mouths and tongues are shut, incapable of expressing our love for them that is diverted into our eyes as tears, bursting forth like waters from a collapsed dam that cleanse also us of our fears and sadness at our impending loss.

Finally, giving permission to die to our beloved is an expression of our faith in God, affirming we all came from God and would someday go home to God in heaven. Thus, giving permission to die is actually to comfort – literally, “to give strength to” – the dying of their faith in God while facing their final tests and temptations in life, assuring them that soon, we shall join them in eternal joy.

Many times, our family and friends suffer so much before death because of our refusal to let them go too. We keep on holding them back that terrify them in making the great crossover. Giving them permission to die is easing and sharing their fears so they can finally let go and let God, that is, die – the meaning of the letter “d” that stands between the words “go” and “God”. According to the prayer by St. Francis of Assisi, it is in dying when we are born into eternal life. Amen.

*Aside from All Saints’ Day and All Souls Day, the whole month of November is a traditional time for visiting the graves of our loved ones. Go and offer them prayers, especially that “permission to die” if you are still holding them and have not yet let them go.

Our great, wonderful God

The Lord Is My Chef Daily Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Monday in the Thirty-first Week of Ordinary Time, Year I, 06 November 2023
Romans 11:29-36 ><))))*> + ><))))*> + ><))))*> Luke 14:12-14

*Photo by author, St. Scholastica Retreat Center, Baguio City, August 2023.*

Dearest God our loving Father,
I join St. Paul today in praising
you through Jesus Christ your Son
who made us experience personally
your transcendence and 
immanence:

"Oh, the depth of the riches
and wisdom and knowledge 
of God!  How inscrutable 
are his judgments and how 
unsearchable his ways!
For who has known the mind
of the Lord or who has been
his counselor?  Or who has
given him anything that he may 
be repaid?
For from him and through him
and for him are all things.
To God be glory forever.
Amen."
(Romans 11:33-36)

*Photo by author, Katmon Nature Sanctuary & Beach Resort, Infanta, Quezon, 04 March 2023.*

Forgive me, O God,
in always trying to reduce you
to our human level when I try
to explain how and why things
are happening in my life,
in the world;
you are simply beyond and
transcendent, surpassing all
we can think about you -
the moment we realize a truth
about you, it is never enough;
at the same time, you are 
immanent, totally present in
everything you have made,
yet still, so close and so far
at the same time!

Deepen my faith in you,
Father through Jesus Christ;
let me trust you as St. Paul
assured us today that your gifts
and call are permanent and
irrevocable (Romans 11:29);
let me follow Christ's admonition
in the gospel to think more of
others than of myself especially
the poor, the crippled, the lame,
the blind and those who could 
never repay me (Luke 14:13);
let me realize that it is in
sharing your gifts to me with
others that I am truly enriched
not when I insist on my own interests.
Amen.

Lent is for remembering & thanking

40 Shades of Lent by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Thursday in the Fourth Week of Lent, 23 March 2023
Exodus 32:7-14   >>> + <<<   John 5:31-47

*Photo by author, 03 March 2023, Teresa, Rizal.*

Forgive us, 
God our merciful Father
for our forgetfulness and
thanklessness; more than
being forgetful, we are also
ungrateful like the Israelites at Sinai.

Many times in life,
we rarely appreciate what we have,
especially the little ones.

How unfortunate we recognize only
big things as important that we forget
everything in life which is the sum of 
the littlest things put together -
the single steps of every journey,
the minute cells of our body,
the little efforts put together 
by the little, ordinary people
who give us our meals, our daily needs,
the small acts of kindness like smiles,
hi’s and hellos we don’t even mind at all;
the little children who play or cry 
to remind us of our beginnings…
So many other tiny, 
little things and moments, 
ordinary people we disregard
that prevent us from remembering and 
thanking you and everyone 
for the many joys and comforts
we enjoy in every moment.

Forgive us also,
loving Father,  
of how we forget
and hence could not appreciate 
to be grateful with the little 
gifts we have within like 
this life we have versus the
great moments of victory and fame we 
choose to remember; the family and
friends you surround us daily
but take for granted as we prefer
big people like the rich and famous;
those little giftedness of ours like
simplicity, sense of humor, 
even rich appetite to savor 
and enjoy ordinary food shared
with common folks we forget 
and become thankless for our gifts
of selves and uniqueness.

Bless us, 
dear God to remember
and be reminded of the many
gifts we have but unaware
that make us thankless and forgetful,
tempting us to create our own idols
and golden calves to worship;
open our eyes to see your works
and majesty in Jesus who became like
us in everything except sin
so that we experience you more
in flesh in us and one another;
help us feel and enjoy life’s little joys
and blessings so we may remember
and never forget all good things 
come from you, often in little
packages to be more appreciative 
and grateful.
Amen.

The truth is… we are loved.

40 Shades of Lent by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Friday in the Third Week of Lent, 17 March 2023
Hosea 14:2-10   >>> + <<<   Mark 12:28-34

*Photo by PhotoMIX Company on Pexels.com*

More than any other prophet, O Lord, 
Hosea is the one who tells us most
of your immense love for us all;
his writing moves like a beautiful
love story so unbelievable
yet exists, so true.
After so many harsh words
against us your people for our
infidelity like prostitutes,
here at the last part of his book,
Hosea tells us to never lose hope
because you love us so much.
Moreover, dear God our Father,
what I like most in Hosea's writings
is how you yourself reveals to us
how we must approach you
like a teacher coaching us 
for the best answers so we may pass
your final exam.

Thus says the Lord: Return, O Israel, to the Lord, your God, say to him, “Forgive us all iniquity, and receive what is good, that we may render as offerings the bullocks from our stalls
Hosea 14:2, 3

Please Lord, help us experience
your promises of "healing our defections,
loving us freely, becoming like dew 
so we shall blossom like the lily, 
our splendor be like the olive tree
and fragrance like the Lebanon cedar,
allowing us to dwell in your shade again
and raise grain, blossom like the vine,
and our fame be like the wine of Lebanon"
(cf. Hosea 14: 5-8).

Cast away our doubts of your love
and mercy for us, Father for as your Son
Jesus Christ had revealed, all the commandments
is summed in LOVE, your great love for us
as the very reason why we must love you
not because you need our love but 
so that we can have more of your love
when we love.
May we love,
love,
and love!
Amen.

Prayer to love the giver, not the gift

The Lord Is My Chef Breakfast Recipe for the Soul by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II
Wednesday, Week XI, Year I in Ordinary Time, 16 June 2021
2 Corinthians 9:6-11 ><)))'> + <'(((>< Matthew 6:1-6, 16-18

So many times, O God our Father, we have been acting so foolishly, forgetting the more essential in life as we waste precious time and our very selves with less important things and matter.

And most often, it is you whom we always forget, whom we disregard when you alone is the one whom we must always desire, whom we must always please for you alone who truly loves us above all.

Most of all, you alone is the Source of all good things in this life to whom we must always turn to.

Jesus said to his disciples: “Take care not to perform religious deeds in order that people may see them; otherwise, you will have no recompense from your heavenly Father.”
Matthew 6:1

You do not need “advertisements” for your goodness and love for us for they are all self-evident.

Worst is how we fail to realize that every time we advertise our goodness and supposed to be holiness, the more we fool ourselves as we become most selfish and not holy at all!

Make us aware to remember the teaching of Thomas á Kempis that it is the love of the giver – YOU – that matters most than the gift itself.

A wise lover values not so much the gift of the lover, as the love of the giver. He esteems the affection above the gift, and values every gift far below the Beloved. A noble lover is not content with a gift, but desires Myself above all gifts.
Imitation of Christ, Book III, Part VI, “Of the proving of the true lover” by Thomas á Kempis (d. 1471)

It is because of this wrong focus on the gifts than on the Giver that we have failed in imitating your Son Jesus Christ in his loving service and generosity with others.

Help us realize, O Lord, that you alone are the source of every good gift in life, that you can never be outdone in generosity as you give us lavishly with all the gifts we need in this life.

Help us realize that we are all vessels and sharers of your grace:

“Moreover, God is able to make every grace abundant for you, so that in all things, always having all you need, you may have an abundance for every good work…You are being enriched in every way for all generosity, which through us produces thanksgiving to God”
2 Corinthians 9:8, 11

We pray, O Lord, for each of us to count the many blessings you have given us amid the hard times that have fallen upon us since the start of this pandemic so that we may see you more above all things. Amen.