Photo by author, Laguna Lake, Los Baños, Laguna, 13 February 2020.
How often does it still happen today, Lord Jesus Christ, that like in our gospel today you would “sigh from the depth of your heart” after we, your people, would ask you for more signs from heaven?
Have mercy on us, Lord, for our lack of faith in you after all these years.
Forgive us for being “unstable in all our ways” with you, always “a man of two minds” as St. James would describe us (James 1:8) in seeking wisdom and things from you.
Forgive us for those moments we doubt your presence and power especially when we fail to win your favor, to get your blessings for our particular prayers and supplications.
The fault is really on us, Lord.
If sighing is your way of keeping your patience with our being so stubborn, teach us to reach out to you in the depths of our hearts, to remember those countless occasions you have saved us.
That instead of asking for signs from you, we may just sigh deep inside us to experience you again. Amen.
Every day, every night, we thank you Lord for so many blessings you have showered upon us. But, every time we thank you Lord, I wonder if we have rightly thanked you?
Saying thank you is not only being grateful for anything given or shared with us; saying thank you is more than recognizing the goodness of the giver, especially you, O Lord our God.
Saying thank you, Lord, is being like David giving his very self wholly to you, for your praise and glory, in the service of your people.
Thanking you, O Lord, is most of all bringing out to share whatever gift you have given us.
The best expression of gratitude especially to you, O Lord, is to be a lamp giving light to others, leading others to you, reminding others of your light and guidance.
Help us, O Lord, to come closer to you to become like you so that it is our life becomes a thanksgiving and praise to you always. Amen.
2 Samuel 7:4-17 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 4:1-20
An oasis near the Dead Sea, Israel. Photo by author, May 2017.
God our Sower, every good seed is from you.
Thank you very much in giving us the best seed of all, your Son Jesus Christ, the “Word who became flesh”, himself the very fruit of the “seed” you promised to King David long, long ago.
That night the Lord spoke to Nathan and said: “Go, tell my servant David, ‘The Lord also reveals to you that he will establish a house for you. And when your time comes and you rest with your ancestors, I will raise up your heir after you, sprung from your loins, and I will make his Kingdom firm. It is he who shall build a house for my name. Your house and your kingdom shall endure forever before me; your throne shall stand firm forever.'”
2 Samuel 7: 11-13, 16
Cultivate us, O Lord, to become good soil who will be open to receive your seed to make it sprout and grow and bear fruits.
So many times in our lives, we choose to be like the “path” where seeds fall and we do not mind at all. Likewise, we sometimes choose to be like the rocky ground who joyfully received Jesus for a while but when trials come, we give up on him because we have not taken him into our hearts to take root in us.
There are those among us, O Lord, who choose to be among the thorns, who choose to believe in science and technology, in materialism that choke the word in us until it dies out and bear no fruit.
In all instances, the problem is with the soil, never with the seed that is so good if given a chance to grow on rich soil would surely be fruitful.
Teach us to be a rich soil, one who is patient and still, willing to wait for your coming each day sowing us the good seed who value silence, and most of all, who uphold the sanctity of life itself so that YOU, O Lord will grow in us, be nurtured by us, be loved and embraced by us.
Show us anew the beauty of your words, O Lord, so we may immerse ourselves in you, be still in your presence to receive and digest your words as food that delights us and strengthens us. Amen.
1 Samuel 18:6-9; 19:1-7 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 3:7-12
Photo by Mr. Jim Marpa, Carigara, Leyte. 2019.
Praise and glory to you O God our loving Father in heaven!
Today, I just want to bask in your immense love for me, to let myself immerse in your love, in your grace, in your mercy.
Please, loving Father, let me be assured always of your love through your Son Jesus Christ.
As I prayed today’s readings, I realized that next to pride, the most sinister sin we have is jealousy that silently creeps into our being, making us forget your enormous love for each one of us. It is something we never outgrow that actually worsens as we age!
Saul was very angry and resentful of the song, for he thought: “They give David ten thousands, but only thousands to me. All that remains for him is the kingship.” And from that day on, Saul was jealous of David.
1 Samuel 18:8-9
Jealousy is more than an insecurity of being less worthy or fear that we are loved less.
At its worst, jealousy is something we have always “nurtured” within us, part of our lack of faith and belief that we are loved, that we are cared for.
That is why jealousy can easily arise within us because it is an enemy we “host” within us!
The Pharisees and the scribes were jealous of Jesus Christ because they have always lacked belief in themselves that is why they kept on quarreling among themselves, competing who would be most admired and accepted by the people.
But the people who came to follow Jesus, seeking healing from him, felt so assured of his love and mercy. No one among them was jealous of others being healed because they felt Jesus loved them all!
That is why I pray today, O Lord Jesus, to let me dispose of that inclination to be jealous always, of wrongly believing and fearing of being denied of your love that is boundless and immense for each one of us. Amen.
Tuesday, Memorial of St. Agnes, Virgin and Martyr, 21 January 2020
1 Samuel 16:1-13 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 2:23-28
Photo by Mr. Jim Marpa, 2019.
The Lord said to Samuel: “How long will you grieve for Saul, whom I have rejected as king of Israel? Fill yor horn with oil, and be on your way. I am sending you to Jesse of Bethlehem, for I have chosen my king from among is sons.” But Sameul replied: “How can I go? Saul will hear of it and kill me.” To this the Lord answered: “Take a heifer along and say, ‘I have come to sacrifice to the Lord.’ Invite Jesse to the sacrifice, and I myself will tell you what to do; you are to anoint for me the one I point out to you.” Samuel did as the Lord had commanded him.
1 Samuel 16:1-4
How many times have I found myself, O God, in the same situation as Samuel? You know very well how I felt so afraid to do your work, so fearful for my reputation and most especially of other people who might harm me in doing your work.
But what really makes it so difficult in obeying you, O God, is when I doubt if you are the one truly speaking to me, when I doubt myself if I get it right from you to do something opposite the way and thoughts of most people.
Oh… how sweet it is to remember those days when I just threw myself to your will, when I just did and say whatever you willed!
It was very scary, Lord, but we did it!
You did it very well, every step of our way!
Thank you, so much, O God! Thank you!
Send us your Holy Spirit to center our lives in your Son Jesus Christ like the disciples “who began to make a path picking heads of grain one Sabbath day” (Mk.2:23) and the Pharisees lambasted them.
Surely, the disciples would have not done that without seeking permission from Jesus. And even if Jesus had allowed them to go and pick heads of grain, I am sure there were some who still doubted him giving the permission to do it!
So nice that they trusted Jesus, like the young and lovely St. Agnes who remained adamantly faithful to him in the face of death. May I be given that same faith and courage today, Lord, to find you in every step I take. Amen.
1 Samuel 15:16-23 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 2:18-22
“Sleeping Sto.Niño” at our altar, 19 January 2020. Photo by author.
Praise and glory to you, O Lord Jesus Christ!
Let me rejoice this first day of work and school in your divine presence, O Lord. Let me celebrate your coming in my life! Let me live in your divine presence most especially when everybody feels and thinks you are not with us, that you do not care at all.
Forgive me, Lord, when I act like Saul in the first reading: obediently fulfilling your will and instructions and yet, insisting on my own ways as if you are not aware of what is in our minds and hearts.
Like Saul, I always confuse your will with my “good intentions”, with what I think as good and the best for you and for others when in fact, I am playing God, “presuming” you will approve and like whatever I deem best for you and others.
But Samuel said: “Does the Lord so delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as in obedience to the command of the Lord? Obedience is better than sacrifice, and submission than the fat of rams. For a sin is like divination is rebellion, and presumption is the crime of idolatry.”
1 Samuel 15:22-23
Help me, sweet Jesus, to always “pour new wine into fresh wineskins”, to always see something new daily in you, to find you present among people and things I take for granted.
Friday, Memorial of St. Anthony, Abbot, 17 January 2020
1 Samuel 8:4-7, 10-22 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 2:1-12
Grotto, Baguio City, January 2019.
Thank you very much, O God for another week of work and school about to close this day. Most of all, thank you for for the rest you have given us these past few days from our restive Taal Volcano. Continue to keep everyone safe and ready for any worst eventuality.
Today we pray, O Lord, for those people who have rejected us, those who have rejected our friendships, those who continue to reject our peace offerings, those who still reject the mercy and forgiveness we have given them.
Our lives have all been marred with so many rejections. Too often, we do not complain and just take them as part of life, the risk in any relationships, though, deep inside, we are hurt.
But, so often, we also forget how we have always rejected you, O God, in our lives. Of how we would rather choose our own ways that often lead us into sins and destruction, rejecting your wonderful plans that simply ask us to trust in you, to believe in you, and to rely in you.
Samuel was displeased when they asked for a king to judge them. He prayed to the Lord, however, who said in answer: “Grant the people’s every request. It is not you they reject, they are rejecting me as their king.”
1 Samuel 8:6-7
Teach us, O God, to open up to you again. To be open to your love and mercy, to your mercy and forgiveness brought to us by your Son Jesus Christ.
Help us to break this cycle of rejections we within that lead us to sin.
Every time we reject you, O Lord, or our brothers and sisters in love and mercy to insist on our own ways, our own ideas and thoughts, and beliefs, that is when we often sin.
Help us to be like St. Antony who left everything in life to be a hermit in the desert in order to find you and follow you. Help us find our own desert of desolation where we can always be alone with you to rely only in you, to accept your truths to guide us in our daily life. Amen.
St. Anthony the Abbot, a.k.a. the Great, pray for us!
1 Samuel 1:9-20 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Mark 1:21-28
Inside our church from the altar table. Photo by author, November 2019.
Hanna replied to Eli, “Think kindly of your maidservant,” and she left..
1 Samuel 1:18
While praying over your words, O Lord, of that scene at the temple when Eli mistook Hannah to being drunk while praying intensely to you for a child, it reminded me of Taal Volcano’s restive behavior, of her spewing ashes and causing tremors.
But despite all these, Taal remains lovely and magnificent.
Sometimes, Lord, that is what exactly we need in life: to think kindly of others always.
The people were astonished at his teaching, for he taught them as one having authority and not as the scribes. All were amazed and asked one another, “What is this? A new teaching with authority. He commands even the unclean spirits and they obey him.”
Mark 1:22, 27
Purify our thoughts, Lord, to always think kindly of others.
To always have that disposition for silence and being non-judgmental with others to always listen to them and be open to their thoughts and feelings as well.
Like you, Lord Jesus Christ, enable us to share in the power of your words, to speak with authority by entering into that daily union with you in silence and prayers.
May we learn also from the gentle Taal: to be still and silent, to speak only when necessary so that everyone listens intently to her inner rumblings when she finally “speaks”.
We continue to pray for those severely affected by Taal’s eruptions, most especially that they may remain kind with people and nature alike in this trying moments of a major calamity.
We pray for businessmen to have a heart, to think kindly of those affected by Taal’s eruptions and stop jacking up prices of much needed goods. Amen.
Quiet Storm by Fr. Nick F. Lalog II, 13 January 2020
Photo by my high school seminary friend, Mr. Chester Ocampo, taken at the UST Senior High where he teaches art (2019).
Life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone..
John Mellencamp, “Jack & Diane” (1982)
Maybe this is part of getting old, of maturing. Of learning to grapple with life’s mortal realities and still be excited with living. It is a grace that is both fulfilling but also deeply moving and often, chilling.
An uncle and a friend have commented to me in our recent chats how 2020 had come in hard and difficult with so many sickness and deaths in the family.
Some relatives have to fly to Singapore on New Year’s Day to support a cousin whose husband had an office accident that left him in comatose for five days following a brain surgery. He eventually died and had to be cremated a few days later.
December 11 I had to drive to Manila to visit and anoint the father of my best friend from high school seminary who arrived December 2 from the States, fell ill December 4, and had to spen Christmas and New year in the hospital.
Less than 24 hours after being discharged January 3, he died the following morning after talking with my friend based in Chicago, three days short before eldest daughter arrived to accompany him and wife back to New Jersey this week.
Meanwhile last January 2, I had to rush again this time to Quezon City for the wake of our high school seminary classmate Rommel who had died of multiple complications morning of December 31.
He is the third to “rest in peace” in our batch of 18 men who graduated the minor seminary in 1982. We last saw him in our reunion, September 9, 1990 (9-9-90).
Suddenly, I felt myself in some kind of a time warp when everything seemed to be not too long ago, as if we have just graduated recently, or that my dad and their dads have just passed away one after the other these past months.
Death can sometimes be magical when life is lived in love
I realized that when we have so much love for everyone like relatives and friends, including parishioners in the last eight years, time stands still after their deaths. You do not count the days and weeks and months and years you were together and when they have all gone.
They all seem to be still present because you are focused on how those departed have enriched your very life, your very person no matter how fleeting or long ago you were together.
Death can sometimes be magical, most of all grace-filled, when our lives are lived in love.
Life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone…
John Mellencamp, “Jack & Diane” (1982)
Photo by author, our sacristy 2019.
Memories and knowledge fade, but love remains
Finally I had the chance to visit my mom – for Christmas! – evening of January 6. It was so good that just before leaving, a cousin arrived with his family to visit also my mother who is the younger sister of his mother, my Tita Celia.
It was only at that evening we have finally confirmed that Tita Celia has Alzheimer’s, the reason why her ways and attitudes have been noticeably erratic in 2019 as she was slowly losing grip of her senses.
And now, it is almost all gone according to my cousin whose sadness I strongly felt as he narrated to me the deterioration of his mother, of forgetting and losing so many things, of not recognizing familiar people like relatives and friends.
That same night, we also learned from him how our moms’ younger brother seem to be having signs of the onset of Alzheimer’s disease that are very similar with Tita Celia.
Again, I found myself in a “time warp” while they were happily conversing I was silently trying to recall the last time I have seen my mother’s siblings now afflicted with Alzheimer’s disease, wondering if they will still recognize me if I visit them later.
Moreover, I also realized how afraid I am with the prospects of getting sick in old age than of dying, sooner or later!
In fact, I was so scared that I had a nightmare that same night: in my dream I found myself lost, apparently with Alzheimer’s as I was searching for my parish rectory, looking for my bedroom, asking people about my parish staff, crying like a child.
What a relief when I woke up Tuesday morning that it was just a dream, that I was in fact in my bed, inside my room, in my parish rectory, so alive and still whole!
It seems it is easier to think and accept of one’s death than of getting sick and incapacitated later in old age. It is something we have to slowly come to terms with while still younger and stronger, and perhaps wiser.
How?
As I recalled our conversations with my cousin Louie that Monday night at home, I was amazed at his great love for his mother, Tita Celia. I remembered how he would always have pasalubong for his mother even upon coming home from school!
Maybe that is why even she had forgotten most of us her relatives, she always remembers Louie her son because he is the one who has truly loved her next to the late Tito Memo, her husband. The same is true with others taking care of their old parents afflicted with Alzheimer’s: they are recognized and remembered because they love.
Our memories and knowledge may be erased but the love we have in our hearts, the love we have experienced always remain even if everything has failed in life. That is why St. Paul declared that “love is the greatest of all gifts of God”.
Life goes on, long after the thrill of living is gone…
John Mellencamp, “Jack & Diane” (1982)
With my former students at the Cubao Cathedral after the wedding of their classmate. I felt so proud, and old, that afternoon seeing them all with their career and family, of how they have maintained their friendships all these years like brothers, of they love one another. Photo by Peter dela Cruz, one in blue.
To live is to love
December 2019 and January 2020 are perhaps my most “marrying months” in my 21 years of priesthood.
Aside from the weddings of friends and students I have officiated these past two months, three more are coming next month of February.
Again, as I saw friends and especially former students getting married, I could not believe at how fast time had passed.
Should I really be surprised when I find out my former students already in their early 30’s, some with families of their own and children whom they instruct to kiss my hand, calling me Lolo Fr. Nick?
It was a very “existential” experience that they are already old, and most of all, I am really that old after all!
Maybe that is what my married friends are telling me of the joy of fatherhood, of having your kids getting married, of having grandchildren, of the inner satisfaction that you have brought life to fruition.
That you have truly loved and now being loved.
It is perhaps the joy of getting old, of maturing, of dying or even forgetting everything when afflicted later with Alzheimer’s that you start to fade from the scene and hand over the stage to the next generation, thinking that life will still go on after us because you have loved much.
What really matters in the end is how we have lived and loved the people around us, of how we have enriched each other’s lives so that as the young ones discover life’s meaning in love, we who are older find life’s fulfillment still in the love from the relationships we keep.
Here’s a hill-billy rock music about love to drive your Monday’s blues away.
1 John 5:5-13 ><)))*> ><)))*> ><)))*> Luke 5:12-16
Flowers at our Altar, Epiphany Sunday 2020. Photo by author.
Dearest Jesus Christ:
Today we pray for those losing hope in life, for those about to give up living because they are saddled with so many problems and sufferings.
And most especially with sins and guilt feelings as carryover of the troublesome 2019.
We pray for those who cannot move on with their lives due to so many heartaches and losses and wrongs last year that they see themselves so dirty like the leper in the gospel today, refusing to aspire to become better, refusing to dream again of good things in you.
It happened that there was a man full of leprosy in one of the towns where Jesus was; and when he saw Jesus, he fell prostrate, pleaded with him, and said, “Lord, if you wish, you can make me clean.”
Luke 5:12
“Lord, if you wish, you can make me clean…
Forgive us Lord when sometimes we seem so hopeless.
“Kung ibig ninyo… kung ano po ang gusto ninyo… bahala na po kayo.”
Flowers at our Altar, Epiphany 2020. Photo by author.
Help us remember St. John’s reminder in the first reading that you, O sweet Jesus, is our life because you are the only one to whom “there are three who testify, the Spirit, the water, and the Blood”(1 Jn. 5:7-8) that refer respectively to your divine nature, human nature, and death on the cross.
You are the only one, Lord Jesus, who has overcome death because you are indeed Life itself!
Thank you very much for always willing the best for us and may we reclaim your wonderful gift of life to us daily. Amen.
lordmychef.com 