Why we must say the names of people we pray for

Quiet Storm by Fr. Nicanor F. Lalog II, 18 September 2023

It was my mother who taught us how to pray early in childhood. Beginning with the Sign of the Cross, she taught us also to be more specific in our prayers by mentioning our names to God as well as everything we need.

We were still two siblings then, with me as the eldest. After instructing us how to put on our kulambo with its long lines of cord tied to nails on the walls because our beds have no posts, Mommy would always ensure that me and my sister pray as she tucked us in our respective bed which went like this:

Thank you very much God for today;
please bless my Daddy Will and my Mommy Cory,
my sister Meg, and I, Nick.  Amen.

Later on came my second sister Bing-Bing and she was added to our list of names to mention in prayer every night. When Bing-Bing was learning to speak and her turn to learn to pray, Mommy added another prayer just for her, had to learn to pray, “God, give me patatas” because she loved potatoes found in our favorite nilaga, pochero, afritada, even the little cubes of menudo!

I still pray this prayer that had automatically added the names of new members of our family, from our bunso my only brother Willy born in 1973 to my brother-in-law when Meg got married, all my four nieces and only nephew, Mommy’s two yayas, along with other relatives and friends that include some of my parishioners as well as brother priests in the ministry all kept in a list in my breviary. Lately, I have been praying that God would bless my nieces and nephew with good marriage partners so I can already have apo, and I don’t mind mentioning their names in my future prayers!

The only other person next to my mother who had taught me to pray mentioning the names of the people I pray for is my Jesuit spiritual guide Fr. Arthur Shea (RIP). During our 30-day retreat in 1995 before our third year in theology, Fr. Shea asked us to always mention the names of the people we pray for, whether still living or already dead because according to him, that makes our prayer truly personal. He assured us that something beautiful happens within us when we mention the names of the people we pray for. And I believed him 100%!

Now I am 58 years old and 25 years as a priest, I have realized that the most effective prayer is always those most personal when we specify the people with their names and the intentions we pray for.

Prayers change and transform people, not situations; when people are transformed, relationships improve, peace and harmony happen among us. Mentioning the name of people we pray for is practical as it lessens the anger and negativities we have against any person. Most of all, it is difficult to pray for people we hate and thus, mentioning their names not only make our prayers effective but also affective.

Even if we do not mention the names of people we pray for, at least when we specify the kinds of people we are praying for produce the same results, both effective and affective. One of the beautiful prayers I have learned in high school seminary was praying for specific people we hardly know but who affect us directly or indirectly like those working overnight to deliver us goods we need the following morning such as drivers and delivery men, market vendors, and bakers. Also included in our night prayers then were those traveling overnight that they may reach their destinations safely and for prisoners languishing in jail especially the innocent ones. It was in those prayers where I learned to think more of other people, to see more outside of myself and search for those in the margins and forgotten whom God loves so much.

Call me crazy or funny, I pray also for our local and world leaders by mentioning their names even if they do not know me or did not elected them at all! When I was in first year theology in 1993, I was so overjoyed that I submitted as my reflection in one of our subjects the historic meeting in Oslo, Norway of Israeli PM Yitzhak Rabin (later assassinated) and the late PLO Chairman Yasser Arafat; I have been praying for the peace process in Israel since I re-entered the seminary and I felt God answered my prayer with that historic meeting between the leaders of two bitter enemies. I just felt so good inside that God heard my prayer, convincing me that God answers prayers of his children, no matter how simple or complicated it may be. That Oslo Accord led to the 2000 Camp David Summit hosted by American President Bill Clinton between Israel and the PLO. Though peace remains elusive in that part of the world, I still pray for the people especially after I had visited the Holy Land thrice.

Of course, God knows everything and what is needed in this world not only in our lives. For sure, he knows us all by name too! But, when we pray for one another as St. Paul tells Timothy, that is when we begin to identify everyone and find our relationships with them as brothers and sisters whom we must love and respect to make this world a better place to live in.

Beloved: First of all, I ask that supplications, prayers, petitions, and thanksgiving be offered for everyone, for kings and for all in authority, that we may lead a quiet and tranquil life in all devotion and dignity.

1 Timothy 2:1-2

It all begins in our hearts when we pray. When we make a space in our hearts for other people by mentioning their names or simply identifying them in particular needs and situations, that is when God truly comes to fill us with his Spirit. Everything then follows like peace and harmony as we have seen in today’s gospel account of the healing the centurion’s servant by Jesus (Lk. 7:1-10).

See how the Jews “approached Jesus and strongly urged him to come, saying, ‘He deserves to have you do this for him, for he loves our nation and he built the synagogue for us.’ And Jesus went with them” (Lk.7: 4-6). Jesus answered their prayers by coming with them already! He must have been so surprised too with their attitude toward the pagan because finally, they saw not differences but similarities as persons believing in God. When we mention names of people, that is when we recognize them as one of us too, making our prayers effective and affective as change and miracles begin to happen. Amen. Have a blessed Monday!